10. Mayonnaise doesnt complain
9. Mayonnaise has a later exparation date
8. Mayonnaise doesnt smell bad
7. Mayonnaise tastes better on a sandwitch
6. Mayonnaise doesnt mind if I make fun of it
5. Mayonnaise is less pale
4. You can recycle mayonnaise
3. Mayonnaise doesnt have "Accidents"
2. Mayonnaise gets more chicks
1. Mayonnaise is smarter
-Submited by Aleph Brian M
10. Thats the only function of his brain
9. He has to keep telling more stupid jokes to try to recover from his other stupid jokes
8. He cant think in his head, so he has to do it by talking
7. He can tell time because he speaks 5 words per second
6. If he stops for too long he will forget what he wants to say
5. It's the only way he can exhale
4. It's the only way he can pick up girls, even though it doesnt work
3. it prevents him from thinking about girls too much
2. He likes to piss off Noodles
1. He can't be labeled as slow like Jon
-Submitted by Aleph Daniel Pe
10. I brought my playstation 2 to a frat overnight
9.I have a phone
8. I have the internet
7. I can talk on the phone that I have
6. I am capable of sending e-mails on the internet
5. I tried to do a fundraiser as Gizbor
4. I sold stuff at convention as Gizbor
3. I have been in JFK for an entire half a term
2. I have been on chapter board longer than I have been a member
1. I'm Leah's brother
-Submited by Aleph Daniel Pe
10. Buy 100 cans of Jolt Cola. Stack them. Number them.
9. Put up missing dog signs with his face on them all around campus
8. Flush the toilet every time he walks in
7. Paint a tunnel on the wall like they do in cartoons. Every day, hit your head as you try to run through it
6. Chain yourself to your roomate's bed and get him to bring you food.
5. Shelve all your books with the spine facing the wall and complain that you can't find the book that you want.
4. Glue everything to the ceiling
3. Sign your roomate up for various activities like cheerleading and cheese club.
2. Create an army of animal crackers and leave a declaration of war on his desk.
1. Spend all your money on transformers. Play with them at night. If your roomate says anything, say "They're more than meets the eye"
-Submitted by Aleph Brian M