Snake: I'd like to place a collect call to Otacon please.
Operator: Please hold sir.... Alright, connecting you now.
Otacon: Snake! Why the hell are you calling collect?
Snake: Do you know how much it costs to call people codec? It's not like I have government funding you know.
Otacon (whining): But now I have to pay for it.
Snake: Don't we have more important things to think about?
Otacon: You're the one that took the time to call collect.
*Meanwhile, back at snakes apartment*
Jesus: Dammit, where's the remote. Snake should know, he always knows for some reason. Where is he.
*Jesus looks around the apartment and finds a note from snake*
Note- I had to take care of some business. We need milk, and batteries. Oh, and I'm going to get us a new TV, one of the nice ones that aren't out yet.
Jesus: He's never around when you need him, is he? Hey, GOD. I need some help.
GOD: YES SON? WHAT DO YOU NEED?
Jesus: Snake disappeared and need him to find the remote. Where is he?
GOD: ARE YOU SURE YOU WOULDN'T LIKE ME TO JUST TELL YOU WHERE THE REMOTE IS?
Jesus: No, just tell me where Snake is.
GOD: A DARK HALLWAY AT 12 WELLINGTON STREET.
Jesus: Thanks big guy. Later.
GOD: GOOD LUCK, MY SON.
*Back in the dark hallway, snake and otacon are still arguing*
Snake: Look, Otacon, if you just stop complaining so I can get some information
Otacon (cutting snake off): But I'll still have to pay for the call.
Snake (yelling now): SHUT UP ABOUT THE DAMN CALL. You're a hacker, you can just erase the phone bill.
Otacon: ...... You're right. What do you need?
Snake: A floor plan and the location they are storing those experimental tvs in.
Otacon: You're going to a lot of trouble to get a new tv aren't you? Isn't the old one good enough?
Snake: You know how often we watch tv... Ahh, thanks. I'll see you later Otacon.
*snake finally takes his hand from his ear and stands. Jesus walks up behind him, and taps snake on the shoulder. Snake jumps and lets out a yelp*
Snake: JESUS, don't sneak up on me like that.
Jesus: No need to Yell. Some people consider that swearing.
Snake: I was swearing. What the hell are you doing here?
Jesus: I need the remote. Where'd you leave it?
*Snake point's to Jesus right pocket, where the remote is sticking out. Jesus smacks his own forehead.*
Jesus: Silly me.
*Suddenly, the lights in the dim hallway go on revealing a LOT of armed guards, all of whom of are pointing their guns at snake and jesus.*
Jesus: ****! let's get out of here!
Snake: Ahh, this is childs play.
*Snakes starts fighting, Jesus is constantly being shot and ressurected. Eventually, most of the guards are dead.*
Jesus: You've killed quite a few people just for a tv.
Snake: They aren't dead. I use tranqs. Im not a monster you know. Now let's get our tv and get out of here.
*End of Episode*
sonicandfffan's Notes: I shortened the last line. This episode feature in the game as a tutorial. Good work Pitt.