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| Episode Six |
| Time to Make Fun of People! Vol. 2 |
| On the last episode, the last match of the first round was underway with Axem Aardvark vs. Axem Image. Going through the stupid rules of illusions of how you must notice them to make them disappear (or something), this episode ended with Aardvark burnt with �Holy pargles of death� and Image blowing off steam. -------------------------------------------------- Our camera focuses on the stadium, with most of it burning� AUDIENCE: Did you know we�re still on fire? BLUE: *Faints* AUDIENCE: We love doing that! Jamey throws a Life Shroom above Aardvark. AXEM AARDVARK: 10/601 AARDVARK: Ull�where�s that grandma and her white Axem hair that doesn�t even exist?... Image walks up to Aardvark and slaps him silly. AXEM AARDVARK: 0/601 JAMEY: Hey! That just defeated the whole point of reviving him! IMAGE: Quiet you. Image throws Jamey out of the window�er, stadium. JAMEY: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! AUDIENCE: Yay. Image walks back to the Contestants� Building. Just then, a man with red hippy hair to the shoulders walked to the ring� S. PIERCE: Let�s do the chicken dance! S. Pierce does his secret move, The Magic Hobo Dance, and turns everyone into Purple Chickens. PURPLE CHICKENS: Bagock? BLUE/PURPLE CHICKEN: *Faints again* PEACEFUL CHICKEN: Looks like I have to go on a healing spree. TURTLELY CHICKEN: Yeah, you better! -------------------------------------------------- Back at the Contestant�s Building� BANGER: Now I�m here too! MERCENARY: Isn�t it strange how we just appear out of nowhere? SNOW: Yeah, it�s great! JKI: Word up, dawg! EVERYONE ELSE: Why do the cameos get the first lines� COPPER: How about we just start talking about nothing until something happens? HASAKI: Yes, let�s� MAGIKOOPA: I think the stupid author adds this Contestant�s Building scene just to add humor�and give everyone at least one line an episode. STRIFE: My gosh, you�re right! IMAGE: If only your face was also right! NOTE: Jamey�s Book of Comeback Jokes, yo! AARDVARK: CAN WE STOP ADVERTISING THAT DARN BOOK FOR AT LEAST ONE SEASON?! DESTRUCTION: I thought you were unconscious after Image slapped you� Aardvark shrugs. JK NINJA: OK, now everyone has had a line. Time to move onto more cameos! BANGER: And Jamey will probably show up again� Jamey walks in, followed by the Audience, brandishing their Flaming Coke Bottles. AUDIENCE: Yay. KEVER: Fire good! PEACE: At least we aren�t chickens� Inferno runs by too. INFERNO: Hahaha! Take off every zig! FAST: Axem Fast thinks this episode is already weird! JAMEY: Who cares?! Anyway, GET THE FUDGE OUT OF MY STADIUM! -------------------------------------------------- � of a second later� The scene changes to the Contestants� Hotel with the eight fighters (and the other four cameos) panting. DUDES: *Panting* *Wheezing* AARDVARK: *Faints* IMAGE: Twice in one day isn�t good for him� Snow and Aardvark start to have flashbacks of how this happened in the last season. AARDVARK: *Having unconscious flashbacks* FAST: Axem Fast is here too� Image throws Fast out the window. FAST: Axem Fast says, �AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!� BANGER: I wonder when you�ll stop doing that. Image throws Banger out the window. BANGER: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! LORD OF TOH: I must say, these episodes are getting repetitive. Image throws the Lord of ToH out the window while she�s at it. LORD OF TOH: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! Everyone else runs into their bedrooms in fear. -------------------------------------------------- That night� JK Ninja slowly undresses and suits up in black ninja gear in the hallway. Peace walks by while he�s doing this. PEACE: *Faints* BLUE: I will just faint as well. AIN�T! BLUE: *Faints as well* JK NINJA: Next time, I use my room� JK Ninja walks over to Destruction�s room. JK NINJA: (thinking) OK, I�ll be fighting him in the next round. I just gotta find his weak points tonight and exploit them tomorrow! He slowly opens the door to Destruction�s room and starts gripping himself to the ceiling. JK NINJA: (thinking) Funny that I could do this AND the door was conveniently open. DESTRUCTION: (sleep talking) No�no� not the butterflies!... don�t eat them!... Curse you, Aardvark� Curse you, Link� NOTE: Windbreaker is probably laughing right about now, for he watched The Return of Ganondorf. WINDBREAKER: Haha. Destruction wakes up upon hearing this. DESTRUCTION: Oh�it was a dream�I just hope that JK Ninja doesn�t figure out somehow that my main weakness is� JK NINJA: (thinking) Yes? YES?! Destruction falls asleep. JK NINJA: (thinking) �Darn, that was a waste�and now my leg�s cramping up! Can�t latch onto ceiling�for any longer� Ninja falls from the ceiling near Destruction. DESTRUCTION: (stirring awake) What the- Oh, it�s you� The ceiling collapses and everyone staying at the Contestants� Hotel falls through. EVERYONE STAYING AT THE CONTESTANTS� HOTEL: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! -------------------------------------------------- The next morning� Everyone wakes up with bags (or whatever) under their eyes. They all report to the front of the hotel. STRIFE: I wonder what the point of this scene would be� HASAKI: Probably to make fun of more people. AUDIENCE: Darn tootin�! Blue faints�yet again. IMAGE: So that�s it?! Moonlight runs by chasing after explosive tumbleweed and singing deranged songs. MOONLIGHT: Not to mention� She is then struck down by Mod Lightning. MOONLIGHT: Owe� SAMURAI: Isn�t it, �Owie?� AND WHY AM I HERE NOW?! Jamey walks by. JAMEY: What a mysterious lightning bolt! I mean, during a bright sunny morning too! THOR, DYNAMITE, and BLOOD KNIGHT: Can we sign up TODAY?! JAMEY: Er�Image? Image throws them all out the window. IMAGE: Even through we�re outdoors� THREE STOOGES: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! PEACE: I�ve just noticed I wasn�t given a proper line yet in this episode�oh wait, never mind. JAMEY: OK, that�s it with this scene, unless� www.geocities.com/jessejames_95148/TOH3_DVD.html JAMEY: Ah, there we go� -------------------------------------------------- A few minutes later inside the Contestants� Building. LORD OF TOH: For some reason, I never liked saying ELAPSE TIME AND PLACE� JAMEY: I have gathered all you combatants and brief cameos to review the ol� tournament ladder which I assume hasn�t been messed up by my underlings. Jamey�s underlings are soon revealed to be a Head of Lettuce, Kirby and some guy. HEAD OF LETTUCE: WHAT�S HIS FACE: That�s right. �Word up!� to all of you! KIRBY: Byo! NOTE: Numbers next to the Contestants are the numbers they picked. AXEM COPPER (8784) vs. AXEM DESTRUCTION (3333), Destruction advances. AXEM HASAKI (6500) vs. JK NINJA (562), Ninja advances. MAGIKOOPA (2000) vs. AXEM STRIFE (279), MagiKoopa advances. AXEM AARDVARK (333) vs. AXEM IMAGE (5000), Image advances. JAMEY: So after all that bolded text, here come the semi-final match-ups! AXEM DESTRUCTION (3333) vs. JK NINJA (562) MAGIKOOPA: (2000) vs. AXEM IMAGE (5000) DUMPFACE: Yup, no screw ups this season! KIRBY: Byo! HEAD OF LETTUCE: WEIRDO: Yes, we shouldn�t be celebrating until we�ve ACTUALLY confirmed it. And why does my name keep changing? HAPPY GRANNY: BECAUSE I WILL NOW BATHE IN YOUR BLOOD! MWAHAHA! LORD OF TOH: I�ll just end this episode now. It�s just getting too weird� END OF EPISODE SIX |