Sex, cars, and cats.
It's been about a week since I actually posted some news stories that affect you and me. Maybe I should stop yapping about myself long enough to tell you about the new articles I have found. Except I don't really have any articles to share... I haven't been collecting any over the past week. It was a pretty slow seven days.

* Cybersex quickies? I don't understand the fascination of wanking it to text messages. And I don't understand how, according to the article, the average male "spends only about three hours per week" doing it. Three hours a week? How many times a week? If it's once a week, that's insane. And if it's every day, well, that's just not cool. I want a percentage of guys that actually do this, just so I can be even more frightened. ASCII art has never looked that good in my opinion. :p To each his own, I guess.

* Viagra saves the day again for male pornstars. Guys using the miracle drug when they don't even have a performance problem are reducing costly movie production expenses ($5,000 to $35,000 a film!) since production doesn't have to be delayed a day or whatever for... eh... "no reserves." "Back then, you could only do one, maybe two (sex) scenes a day," said Collins, who has been an actor since 1998. "Now, we're doing five." Ouch.

* Hey, women are good drivers, right? Hehe! Even I drive better than them. And I don't need to hit six cars and a pedestrian to tell you so.

* This is the dumbest protest ever. It's more proof for why I hate the rest of the world.

And I'm getting tired of this layout already. Heh. I'm never happy. ;p

Well this hella sucks
Mother called up MediaOne this morning to inquire about the installation process and some other stuff. I guess she didn't expect "wires all over the place" like we have for the phone modem, so she decided not to get the cable modem. And the installation guy was coming today, too. Grrr.

I'm not sure what she was expecting, since it's not like we were getting a wireless broadband service (I don't think she knows that's even a possibility). And given the size of the house and the distance between the computers and where the TV cable is (the two computers are like 75 feet apart, and the main TV cable is downstairs somewhere), one had to expect the presence of wires along the walls or whatnot.

So now I have no broadband connection, nor should I expect one until I move the hell out of my house and get it myself. That being said, I can't really host my sites from my own computer like I wanted to. And since my mom didn't get the free network card that would have came with the cable modem, I can't format my computer and do other bad awful things I wanted to do for about another week.

This is so dumb. I had my hopes up for about a month only to have nothing to show for it. :/

Ash Gromnie shocks you for 118 points of damage!
While thumbing through the famous last words of player characters, it reminded me of the good times I had back on the Frostfell server. I kinda miss my days in Asheron's Call. You know, killing the same stuff over and over again, amassing loot that I would eventually sell on eBay. Or playing on the RPI network, lose my connection, and then never find my body again. Or for some real fun, doing things like pissing off other people or doing a quest I couldn't have done by myself (I'm the chick in the dead center with the gray coat and the dark gold salad bowl for a hat, hehehe). But it's not really the action I miss. I kinda miss my online peeps. One still talks to me to this day, but I still wonder how my boys (especially Kenjutsu-Kai Iaido, Arcath, and Neos) and my girls (Al-Qutuz, Weeeee, and my liege Storm Jade) are doin'. I don't really have a way to find out, either, since the monarchy site was torn down. *sigh* Oh well. Perhaps I shall find them again in Shadowbane.

And speaking of Shadowbane, there will be housing! How tight is that? Want to own your own little cottage? Perhaps a villa? Or how about your own three-story fortress? They can be yours if you save up enough gold. Housing in Ultima Online sells for hundreds (even thousands) of American dollars, and they cannot be destroyed. But this isn't UO. There is a chance that if you log in and you can't find your house, someone probably bitch-slapped it with a trebuchet in Shadowbane. Bring it. Just make sure you don't store your valuables at home. :)

Heh, I pimp this game out so much that you'd think I was part of their marketing team.

Jerome's restaurant review
I'll make this review really brief.

Reasons why The Common Man rocks:
* It reeks of New England style.
* If you're lucky, you may have a magnetic kitchen knife!
* Modestly priced for what you get.
* GET THEIR BAKED APPLE. God damn... So good...! In fact, get two!

Reasons why The Common Man sucks:
* We couldn't figure out how to get change back from a gift certificate. :p
* That's about it.

And... I'm spent. I want another baked apple now. Comes with cinnamon and nutmeg and vanilla ice cream, too. *drools*
The ice cream puff is desiged to kill you, by the way. Good luck finishing it.

Personality Disorder Test - Jon's results
First time around:

Disorder | Rating
Paranoid: Moderate
Schizoid: Moderate
Schizotypal: Moderate
Antisocial: High
Borderline: Low
Histrionic: Very High
Narcissistic: Very High
Avoidant: High
Dependent: High
Obsessive-Compulsive: High

Now how could this not be bad? This guy is friggin' messed in the head! Dude... I don't even know what to say about this.

So Jon reconsidered some questions and then got these results:

Disorder | Rating
Paranoid: Low
Schizoid: Low
Schizotypal: Low
Antisocial: Moderate
Borderline: Low
Histrionic: High
Narcissistic: Moderate
Avoidant: Moderate
Dependent: Low
Obsessive-Compulsive: Moderate

I like how dependence and narcissism have bother dropped significantly, while the other categories are essentially one tier lower.

People with histrionic personality disorder are constant attention seekers. They need to be the center of attention all the time, often interrupting others in order to dominate the conversation. They use grandiose language to discribe everyday events and seek constant praise. They may dress provacatively or exaggerate illnesses in order to gain attention. They also tend to exaggerate friendships and relationships, believing that everyone loves them. They are often manipulative.

And I was expecting the OCD category to get more love than just a mere "moderate" rating.

Tribes 2 isn't as fun without people you know
How am I supposed to talk shit if I can't do it to someone who knows I'm not being serious? *sigh*

Personality Disorder Test
This test, sponsored by 4degreez.com, is meant to help determine whether or not you have a personality disorder. It is not meant to be used as a diagnostic tool, but rather as a tool to give you insight into a potential disorder that may be having a negative impact on your life. If you believe you may be suffering from a personality disorder or any other disorder, you should ask your family doctor to recommend a therapist in your area to meet with.

Please remember that this test isn't meant to diagnose you. Only a professional can do that. Below are your test results, broken down for the ten different personality disorders. You are rated "low," "moderate," "high," or "very high" probability for each disorder. Low or moderate ratings mean that you are unlikely to have the disorder. High or very high means you are more likely to have the disorder. Only a professional can diagnose a disorder, however.

Disorder | Rating
Paranoid: Moderate
Schizoid: Moderate
Schizotypal: Low
Antisocial: Low
Borderline: Low
Histrionic: Low
Narcissistic: Moderate
Avoidant: Low
Dependent: Low
Obsessive-Compulsive: Low

Hehe. In the "schizoid" description: They do not show a need for attention or acceptance.
And in the "narcissistic" description: People with this disorder seek attention and praise.

I also love this question in the test:
When you are talking to someone, do they sometimes have difficulty following your train of thought?

This question so reeks of me! :)

Take the test. In the mean time, I will continue peeling the skin off of my right ear. Seriously.

Ding Dong, The Bitch Is Finally Dead
Jon here, for my monthly day. Here is a conversation with Jerome.

me: my wife died
me: http://www.usgennet.org/usa/pa/county/warren/Resources/Obits/Mrs__Jonathan_Sheldon/mrs__jonathan_sheldon.html
Jerome: i'm sorry, dude
me: I also wrote a book: Unfair & Deceptive Acts & Practices
me: http://www.addall.com/Browse/Detail/1881793575.html
Jerome: i didn't mean to rail her so hard
me: its ok
Jerome: nice
Jerome: a $100 book on cheating

I'm listening to a very bad album.
And being jobless sucks. Especially since I thought majoring in information technology would land me a job where I would live comfortably and still have enough time and money left over to spoil myself a bit. Oh well. Shit happens. The economy will probably pick up later. Too bad I'm pessimistic by nature, yet I portray myself to be optimistic all of the time. At least I'm not the only one in this predicament. And those online job-hunting search engines have waned in relevant job postings in the last couple months. *sigh*

And it looks like I'm out of a webmaster job for a while, too. For 24 hours, in fact. Jonny take the proverbial yet fictitious helm on the 18th, since it is the third Wednesday of the month. I guess this means I'll have even more time to finish up one of my side projects, or maybe even find a place to work. Woo.

Yup. Part 2.

Jon: I'm propositioning you
me: nice
Jon: You've got a greeting, click here.
me: you have too much free time
Jon: no, its automated
[...]
Jon: You've got a greeting, click here.
Jon: you should make a link to this one on your website
Jon: 8-)
me: ooph
Jon: it makes you kinda sad to have a friend like me, eh?
me: especially when you use the email addy [email protected]
Jon: haha

Yup.

Ray: I seriously need some head.
Ray: :oD
me: i hope you aren't propositioning me
Ray: Uh...NO! NO! NO! NO! I meant a woman.
me: hehehehe

I should have played along and said something like "because if you are propositioning me..." never mind. I don't want to think about it anymore.

This one post per day thing sucks
And I actually felt like writing today. Unfortunately, Blogger was down for a good chunk of the day. And once again, here I am, posting just shy of midnight. Heh. C'est la vie.

But now, I don't really want to say anything. I managed to acquire a cold from someone who thought he had allergies. Guess not. Now I'm all messed up. And it's the middle of July. That's really messed up. That's almost as bad as when I got sick halfway through Spring Break. Now that sucked.

What also sucks is that there was no cable modem installation going on in my house today. Instead, it will happen on Saturday. What the hell? I've had my computer ready for file transfering and for a rigorous formatting for about two weeks now. This blows. I kinda want to be able to learn ASP and give me that much more "l33t 5killz" to add to my fairly boring resumé. That's kinda hard to do if I can't get Win2k up and running from a clean install. Damnit.

That's all I can say for now, since I'm about to take some red Nyquil and get knocked the fuck out for approximately four days. Hehe, see you then. ;p

"daPimps suck my J"
Ain't much happening with the ol' J-Man as of late. I did finally see Pulp Fiction, though. I knew all of the quotes from the movie thanks to some exposure from my former RPI roommates, but I never actually saw the film. Now, uh, well, that's no longer the case. Yay.

And supposedly, the next round of Planetarion starts in about four weeks. You know you want to blow up other planets with me. It doesn't even require any effort to play, either, so don't say "I don't have the time" as an excuse. That's bullshit. Anyhoo, I'll keep you tuned in as new round details develop.

And now, headlines!

* Every J-man needs their own J-Lo, and it looks like my J-Lo is in trouble for using a certain racial sobriquet in her latest song written by Ja Rule. In this article, you will learn the ways of angry mob mentality and you will see "respect" and "Eminem" in the same sentence. Freaky.

* The Man Show's Periodic Table. I'm under the impression that they change their periodic table frequently for some reason (by either adding to this one or starting from scratch again), so you better take a look at it now while you still can.

* Me love you long time... in two years. The people of Kenya aren't allowed to get freaky freaky in order to stop the spread of HIV. Part of the national budget has to go to buying rubbers now, too.

* And since all of those links were relatively low on the disturbing scale, here's a story designed to taint this post's good natureness.

Cable modem tomorrow. I hope.