Table Of Contents:

---

---

About the Author

Dedication

Introduction

---

Chapter One:
AN AMERICAN FAMILY
"The point at which two lines meet"

Chapter Two:
THE AMERICAN SOCCER MOM SOCIETY
"I do so solmenly pledge to daily strive to achieve a state of busy"

Chapter Three:
BEING A SOCCER MOM IS A GOOD THING
"If I expect my children to value education, I must continually pursue it myself"

Chapter Four:
GOAL LINE TEXAS
"It's tough to have a family crisis without family"

Chapter Five: AN EXAMINATION OF MY OWN POLITICAL DEFINITION
"I have a label I have inherited, but..."

Chapter Six:
INTRODUCTION TO THE INTERNET
"And then the world shrank"

Chapter Seven:
THE APPEARANCE OF IMPROPRIETY
"The Emporer has no clothes on but we are not allowed to tell him"

Chapter Eight:
THE WASHINGTON POST POSTER CHILDREN
**Dear friends I've never seen who always debate with kind hearts... **most of us... **most of the time.

Chapter Nine:
THE CANDY ROSE FILE
"Ms. Candy, I do want to see the rest of the LUM file... E: me!"

Chapter Ten:
THE KAMAKASI ASSIGNMENT
"Get your bras out of the fire, the feminists have lost it"

Chapter Eleven:
THE GREAT AND POWERFUL AMERICAN MEDIA
"Will we ever be able to trust you again"

Chapter Twelve:
THE MONICA YEAR
"Brought to us and sponsored by The Great American Media"

Chapter Thirteen:
READY...., AIM.....,
"Don't fire until you see the whitewalls on their minivans"

Chapter Fourteen:
FOOL'S GOLD
"...and to honor him, they gave him his weight in glitz and glitter"

Chapter Fifteen:
Hillary Rodham Clinton, Co-President
"I'm NOT that way. I take care of people"...HRC

Chapter Sixteen:
The Impeachment of William Jefferson Clinton
"The Partisan mauling of the Constitution--Caught on Film"

Chapter Seventeen:
The Arkansian Proliferation Plan
"America, can you spare a 'digm?".... Bill Clinton

Chapter Eighteen:
The Soccer Mom photo Album
"At this point in our lineage"

@Jenni Vinson May 25, 1999