2004.04.24
The Day of Silence was on Wednesday. Yes folks, I actually went the entire day at school without talking. It was only 6 people participating, but some would jump in later and be silence for a couple of periods, one period, 10 minutes, whatever. We were very well recieved, and only Mopey (no surprise) and my first period teacher gave me any signs of objection. (My Philosophy teacher probably objected too, but he didn't say anything.)
I had it easy, myself. Others, not so much. I know Luke for one had a tough time. He was telling his mother and a friend of his family about it, and both had strong objections. His mother had always told him that she would support him in anything he did, even if she disagreed with it. The real icing on the cake, though, was what the family friend said. She told Luke that she had gay friends, and lesbian friends, and although she disagreed with their lifestyles, she loved them anyways. "It's those bisexuals I can't stand!" Luke was ready to cuss her out right then and there, and I might very well have done the same if I were him. He just left it alone, though. At the very least, now he knows that he can't tell his parents about his sexuality- probab;y not ever. It's a shame, but I suppose it's better that he knows now then when it's too late.
Luke's father reacted in a completly different way, though. His father is chairman for our school council, and was at school on Thursday to set up for parent-teacher interviews. He caught wind of what we did, (Luke didn't plan on telling him after the way his mother reacted), and told Luke how proud of him he was for standing up for what he believed in. His father took a couple of our left-over cards to show school council in case a few fundie parents call in to complain. Personally, I kind of hope that they do call. Currently, our school board has said that they aren't allowed to touch the issue. Angry parents would force them to discuss the issue of GLBT students, and to actually deal with it. They need to deal with it.
I attend a 1200-population school. That's fairly big. Now, according to statistics, between 2% and 10% of the population is homosexual. For simplicity, we'll assume that this statistic includes bisexuals and transgenders as well. That means at my school, there should be roughly between 24 and 120 GLBT students. I know 2. I know 1 personally, and the other by name only. (Stephanie knows him better- she has class with this second guy.) I can say with a fair degree of confidence that this is about the record. I highly doubt that anyone at our school can name more then 2 GLBT students. And that is sad.
I was explaining this all to Tarryn on Tuesday night. She wanted to know if next year, we could change it a little, and do a Day of Silence against all kinds of discrimination- not just focusing on the discrimination faced by GLBTs. I strongly objected to this, on the grounds that the Day of Silence is supposed to be for anti-GLBT discrimination, and for the reasons stated above. Students at my school are afraid to come out. The anti-GLBT slurs and teasing is terrible. Heck, if I were GLBT, I'd be afraid to come out at my school! This needs to stop, and the Day of Silence is a step in the right direction towards getting it to stop. It needs to stop.
I also had an interesting discussion with my friend Doug a few nights ago. Normally, we don't talk very much, but he commented on my MSN name (promoting the Day of Silence), and asked me a few questions about it. He commented that I had, "finally found her backbone". That one line stuck with me for a while. Doug hasn't seen me since last year (he's at university this year). I always figured myself to be a very strong person. Yet, he seems to think that last year, I was spinless. A pushover. The exact opposite of who I wanted to be. And you know something?
He was right.
Last time I saw him, I was with Stephen. I was a lot quieter about the things that I beleieved in during that time- especially issues he disagreed with. I mean, I would talk about them and assert my opinion when the issues came up, but otherwise... silence. I'm not going to sugarcoat anything here, either. Stephen is a homophobe. Time and time again he mentioned how he disagreed with homosexuality- even to Luke's face! He's racist. This year, a Muslim girl came to our school, and he mentioned how he was shocked that they would "let a Saladin into this school." That wasn't the only anti-Islamic thing he's ever said, either. He constantly mentioned his views on woman's rights, and how her place was in the home and that a woman should never speak out against her husband. He was fundamental with his religious views, and never dared to even consider straying from them. This all leaves me to wonder... what the heck was I doing dating the guy for a year and a half? What was I thinking?!
Easy answer. I wasn't. I wasn't thinking. If I had been thinking, I would have ended things with Stephen at the first racist, homophobic or sexist comment. Had he not held those views, I might have even been able to handle his fundamentalism! But not all of that. Not when I feel so strongly otherwise. I shoudl have said more about that, too. I really and truly had no backbone, and I couldn't see it until now.
Don't worry, I've got it back. Stephen can't do so much as be politically incorrect before I jump on him for it. I've challenged him on countless occasions about homosexualit; now more then ever, in light of the Day of Silence, Luke coming out, and new laws and policies to benifit GLBTs. I'm not quiet anymore.
I kind of like me better this way.
-Jenna
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