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You live with us for 13 years,
Through all the love, and all your fears.
And now I cry 1000 tears
For you're no longer here.
I'm sorry we could not save you.
I'm sad for all we put you through.
We did all that humans can do
But could not pull you through.
The cancer won, and now you're gone,
You're free from all its wrath.
But we remain, and feel the pain
That it left in its path.
We miss you so, more than you know
Our hearts are incomplete.
And they will ache, and we will wait,
Until the day we meet.
Living here without you,
Missing you each day,
Feeling so lost and empty,
Will the pain ever go away?
I know in time it lessens,
The memories will pull us through.
And you are in God's hands now
But oh, how we miss you
From running when you saw him,
To following in his path,
Waiting by the playroom steps
Until Daddy came back.
Sitting still for fluids,
Taking pills willingly,
Never fighting force feedings
You constantly amazed me.
I'm glad you liked the tuna
And the chicken soupy too.
To see you rub your little face...
It helped to pull us through.
I'm sad you are not here today,
And that life, it must go on.
But it will never be the same
Now that My Bitsy's gone...
You were usually timid around me, keeping your distance. When I'd get too close to you, your human mom and I could almost hear you saying, "Scream! The MAN!" and you'd run and hide. But you loved being brushed, and on those rare occasions when I brushed you instead of your human mom, you welcomed my attentions on you.
We're sorry we don't have a good enough picture of you. Even though we tried hard, you usually either ran, or we captured your "Scream! The MAN!" expression on film.
When you were first diagnosed with hyperthyroid disease on September 11, 2001, we didn't know how we would ever get the pills into you. However, you liked the treats I gave you -the roast beef, ham and turkey - even though they sometimes had a "funny" taste when I'd sneak a pill or two into them. When you finally got wise to the pills, you made it perfectly clear you didn't want those pills, no way, no how. I tried to explain to you how the pills were necessary and kept you from getting sick, but you didn't quite understand. At first the whole house heard how much you wanted to run and hide rather than let me even just get close enough to hold you. After a few weeks, you learned that getting a pill or two "the hard way" wasn't so bad, and within a few months, you came to accept it as a routine thing. It was then that you realized that I wasn't so scary, and I was accepted by you. You'd let me pet you, and you even started coming to me for affection. You stopped being so timid around me.
I am grateful to you and to God that you finally accepted me and let me get close to you. When we found out just three weeks ago that you had lymphoma, you proved to us just how trusting you had become. You put up with us giving you sub-Q fluids twice a day, and couldn't have tolerated it better. You'd lie there while we pet you and kept you hydrated. When you didn't have the desire to eat enough, you accepted the syringe feeding better than I would have ever guessed.
I'm so sorry that we couldn't fix what was wrong inside of you, Bitsy. I hope you know that everything we did for you was with all the love in our hearts.
You may have been small in size, but you'll always be big in our hearts.
Daddy Jeff
December 16, 2004