Are you ready for a very silly quiz?
Mark your answers and check them when finished
1. Oh no! Who left the window open? Now a female chipmunk has come in with the breeze and is doing an exotic dance all over Grandma Wuggle's muffins. I say shoot it. You say the more humane thing to do will be to:
A. Trap her and keep her as a pet
B. Skin her alive
C. Sell her to a stranger
D. Throw a net over her and toss her in the fire
2. A very long time ago, an asteroid hit the earth and killed all the dinosaurs. That is because the asteroid:
A. Was full of poison
B. Went around strangling them in their sleep
C. Provided them with a cheap source of heroin
D. Blew all sorts of dust into the atmostphere and blotted out the sun blah blah blah blah yeah yeah blah blah
3. Suzi Scum has a terrible case of acne. She has tried scraping her blemishes away with a knife and burning them away with sulfuric acid. If you can stop laughing at her long enough to suggest an oral cure, you would suggest:
A. Talmine
B. Stricnine
C. Merchantmarine
D. Tetracycline
4. Timmy Buffles has come home early from school, crying. He says that he broke is orca playing baseball. His parents will most likely rush him to the:
A. Podiatrist
B. Pediatrician
C. Psychiatrist
D. Executioner
5. The most important incident of all history is:
A. The Robespierre Fruity Ice Cream Disaster
B. The Hugely Ignored Battle of WWII
C. The Humourus Volcanic Eruption of the 17th Century
D. The Single Grammatical Mistake of the Old Testament
6. Assume that you are hideously ugly. Your shadow has been know to traumatize small children and kill family pets. You leave big greasy stains on any furniture that you sit on. Never-the-less, you have found someone who accepts you for who you are. Unfortunatly, that special someone:
A. Has won a Pullitzer Price
B. Is a cannible
C. Bathes in monkey vomit
D. Divorced a mongoose
7. Your child has come home, wanting to know more about Hans Chiristen Anderson. Unfortunately, you know next to nothing about him. The only true thing that you can tell your child is that:
A. He eats dead people
B. He sees dead people
C. Dead people see and eat him
D. He is dead
8. The most famous dead Arthur Cromwell is:
A. Arthur Cromwell
B. Artuer Cromwell
C. Art Cromwell
D. Arthur Cromratherpoorly
9. "Make room in the bathtub 'cause here comes an asteroid, Walter!"
A. Poison
B. Sleep
C. Heroin
D. Blah
10. Nobody expects:
A. The dishes to wash themselves you lazy jerk
B. You to get this question right
C. The Spanish Inquisition
D. My mother when she drops by for dinner
11. Italy borders which Albanian Country?
A. Canada
B. Albania
C. Russia
D. Mexico
12. The rarest minorities in St. Corinth's Day were:
A. Albanians
B. Canadians
C. Egyptians
D. Chinese
13. Richard Simmons:
A. Pouff
B. Not a Pouff
C. Pooch
D. A Pouff, but for leagal reasons we are not allowed to admit it
14. Koth's favorite word to say out loud is:
A. Muh!
B. Gack!
C. Bah!
D. Bleck!
And finally, an easy one:
15. The most frightening articles of clothing are:
A. Papal Underwear
B. Stupid Looking Latvian Folk Garb
C. The dresses that Peggy wears to the Prom
D. Those German helmets that have the spikes on them
