Sephiroth : Is there a point to this game?
Shi’Iana : You’re supposed to kill your opponent.
Sephiroth : And…?
Jha’Meia : And kill her again, and again.
Sephiroth : And…?
Shi’Iana : Busy. Can’t talk now. Dammit, Jha! Why do you always have to use Ryu?? I hate it when you use him!
Sephiroth : You two sure are talkative today.
Jha’Meia : Hmmm.
Katherina : What is your problem, Sephiroth?
Sephiroth : Definitely not you.
Katherina : Amazing. What is it?
Sephiroth : I was watching Jha’Meia surf the Net the other day…
Jha’Meia : (turning from computer game) When?
Sephiroth : ( speaking very carefully and cautiously, obviously knowing something bad might come out of it ) … And she stopped by this website which had this theory about why Aeris and I should go together.
Katherina : So?
Sephiroth. : Well…
Katherina : You’ve been giving it some thought, right?
Sephiroth : Well…
Katherina : ( starts pointing at Sephiroth ) Look, he’s blushing!!!
Sephiroth : You sure like aiming for the jugular, don’t you?
Katherina : Below the belt is more like it.
( Jha’Meia and Shi’Iana stop playing their game to stare at Sephiroth )
Sephiroth : What?
Jha’Meia : I say, what a splendid shade of pink!!
Shi’Iana : He actually looks kinda cute with that colour on his face, tee hee hee!!
Katherina : Yeah. And Aeris loves pink, too.
Sephiroth : I’m leaving. ( gets up ) You’re not helping me any.
Jha’Meia : Aww don’t go, Sephi! We were just teasing you! Have a seat and tell us your prrrroooblemmmm…..
Sephiroth : ( mumbles to self )
Shi’Iana : Have a seat, Seph! We promise we won’t tease you all that much!
Sephiroth : ( mumbles to self again )
Katherina : Aaaahhh… the little joys of life.
Jha’Meia : What, no more crush on him?
Katherina : Oh, I didn’t mention Jas to you? I met him in-
Shi’Iana : Geez, Kat! Running off for another man!
Katherina : Hey! I’m married to my job, okay?
Sephiroth : ( begins tiptoeing to the door )
Jha’Meia : HEY!! WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
Sephiroth : Damn!
Shi’Iana : If you don’t sit down here at once, we’re going to call for Aeris, no matter what you do!
Sephiroth : ( pulls out masamune )
Katherina : I’ll hold his sword at bay while you call her.
Sephiroth : ( Lowers masamune ) Damn. I’ll get you for this, writer,
see if I don’t.
Jha’Meia : Are you planning to ask her out?
Shi’Iana : Movie? Dinner?
Katherina : Whoa, whoa, whoa…
Jha’Meia : Let’s just plunge into this before he has time to think it through, Kat.
Shi’Iana : Quick! Answer before you blush too much!
Sephiroth : ( groans ) You are definitely not helping me…
Jha’Meia : We weren’t made to be helpful. Go on.
Sephiroth : Do you really think the theory is sound?
Jha’Meia : … … … Well… ( looks doubtful )
Shi’Iana : ( hissing to Jha’Meia ) Just say yes!!
Jha’Meia : ( demeanour changing VERY quickly ) Of course!!
Shi’Iana : On the other hand, why don’t we just call Aeris here?
Sephiroth : Oh, no no no no no…
Jha’Meia : Why don’t we approach her and ask her whether she likes Sephiroth? In his absence, of course.
Sephiroth : Hey…
Katherina : I think it’s a splendid idea. Coming Shi’Iana?
Shi’Iana : Naturally.
( The ladies get off their chairs and head for the staircase )
Sephiroth : Hey!!!
Shi’Iana : Oh, Aaaaeeeerrriiiissss!!
Sephiroth : HEY!!!
( The three girls poke their heads around Aeris’ bedroom door )
Jha’Meia : Aeris? You free a moment?
Aeris : ( pottering over a little rose plant in a pot ) Yeap. What is it?
Shi’Iana : Well… You see, Sephiroth was just talking to us about a very touchy subject and just asking, would you like him if you were available?
Aeris : But I am available.
Shi’Iana : Ah… urr… Splendid! Would you go for him?
Aeris : … … … …
( Katherina, Jha’Meia, Shi’Iana lean forward waiting for an answer )
Aeris : Well… ( mumble mumble mumble )
Katherina : ( cupping ear ) What was that?
Aeris : I said, well… ( mumble mumble mumble once more )
Jha’Meia : Look! ( points ) She’s blushing!
Aeris : No I’m not!!! ( covers cheeks )
Katherina : Are too!!
Shi’Iana : C’mon Aeris… we’re your frrriiiieeennnndddddsss.
Aeris : ( covering face ) I’m not going to answer!
Jha’Meia : Oh, my god, (hisses to Shi’Iana) Sephiroth’s coming up!!!
Shi’Iana : Quick Aeris, give us an answer!
Katherina : If you don’t give us an answer quick, we’ll just call Sephiroth here.
Aeris : ( very very softly) I just might.
All three girls : OH, HOW WONDERFUL!!!!
Katherina : Sephhiiiiiiiiiirrrooootttthhhh!!!
Shi’Iana : Oh, Sephiroth!
Aeris : What now??
Jha’Meia : Well, there’s this website which hints heavily upon the possibility of you and Sephiroth having a relationship, and that gave him something to think about and just now he came to talk to us about it and then -
( Jha’Meia doesn’t get to finish because Katherina pulls her out of the room, grabs Sephiroth’s arm and shoves him inside Aeris’ room and slams the door )
Sephiroth : HEY!!!! ( bangs on door ) What the - ?? ( turns Oh… uh… well… hello Aeris…
Aeris : Well… hello yourself… ( clears throat and laughs nervously )
(from outside : Dammit! Move aside! I wanna hear too!! Shove off, sista! I got here first!!!)
Laguna : Hello girls. What are you all up to now?
Shi’Iana : SSssssshhhh!!! Listen!!
Laguna : ( looks blur ) To what?
Shi’Iana : Sssshhh!! ( presses ear to door )
(INSIDE)
(Both occupants very shy and bloody well nervous. Think Beauty and
the Beast “Just a little scared, neither one prepared….” )
Aeris : So… what were Jha’Meia and Shi’Iana all referring to, actually?
Sephiroth : ( mumbles something unintelligible )
Aeris : ( moves closer ) Sephiroth?
Sephiroth : ( mumbles again )
Aeris : … Who brought up the subject first?
Sephiroth : ( still mumbling, but audibly ) I did. Now I wish I hadn’t.
Aeris : You?
Sephiroth : Uh… yes.
( both fall silent )
Sephiroth : Are you free tomorrow night?
(OUTSIDE)
Jha’Meia, Shi’Iana and Katherina : HE ASKED HER OUT!!! ( hug each other ) How romantic!!!
( door crashes open, causing the snoopers to fall back )
Jha’Meia : Damn! There goes another thousand bucks!
Sephiroth : ( walking over fallen people ) Excuse me…
Shi’Iana : Well?? Well?? ( gets up and runs into Aeris’ room ) What’s happening tomorrow?
Aeris : ( smiles shyly ) Nothing much.
( Vincent passes by )
Vincent : ( helping Jha’Meia up ) What’s going on?
Jha’Meia : Sephiroth asked Aeris out.
Vincent : … … … … …?
Laguna : Wow… cool. So?
Jha’Meia : ( slaps forehead ) I forgot you’re from FF VIII.
Shi’Iana : Well ( clears throat ) you see…..
Katherina : Sephiroth killed Aeris about twice in the game, and actually, their fathers used to work together, and we all think that he needs a break from the bad guy stereotype and who else to pull him out other than Aeris?
Vincent : Uh… that sounds… wonderful.
Laguna : He killed her twice and now he’s asking her out? ( walks away shaking head ) You FF VIIers are weird… …
Shi’Iana : I can’t wait till tomorrow night!