Sephiroth : (coming up from behind her) Hello, writer!
Jha’Meia : (Looks at Sephiroth suspiciously) Since when did you start being so friendly?
Sephiroth : Well, it came to my attention that if I treated you nicely, you would make that Katherina loosen her hold on me and allow me to kill you all. As you can see, it’s not so fun being in her control.
Jha’Meia : (turns back to computer) But you’re so well-behaved when you’re under her control. No threats of deaths hanging over our heads. (thinks) Well, threats of death from your mouth, but no biggie so long as we got Kat around to keep you company.
Sephiroth : You think I like her company?? You’re even more twisted than Hojo!!!
Jha’Meia : (already immersed in her old files) Ummm.
Sephiroth : What’s that you’re reading? ( points at screen ) Why is my name in there? And why is it misspelled??
Jha’Meia : It’s one of my old files. Long before I figured out you were a bloody ass through and through.
Sephiroth : (tapping on the “Page Down” button) “Ayrees Gains”?? What the hell??
Aeris : (pops head around door) Did someone call?
Jha’Meia : Wasn’t my idea. D’Brah and Shi’Iana were the ones who told me you liked Aeries. So I wrote a little love story-
Sephiroth : How can I have liked her when I’m supposed to have killed her? Twice, too, if I’m not mistaken.
Jha’Meia : (shrugs)
Aeris : Whaaaat? (Comes in and up to the computer) What’s this??
Jha’Meia : (thinks : One, I can handle… both… uh-oh…) Oh, $#iiiiiiiittt!!!!
Sephiroth : Whoa, wait, I hide in her bed? What’s that all about?? Now I’ve got to continue reading…
Aeris : Sephiroth hides in my bed? When? Where?
Jha’Meia : It’s not really you in there, you @*(&#$&@!!!
Sephiroth : @*(&#$&@ is right. And nothing happens??
Jha’Meia : What do you supposed would have happened, with your demeanour that way? Man, Sephiroth, what a waste! Good looks, but you’re such a bas3rd. What a bloody shame!!
Aeris : Oh, my goodness, what happens here? A proposal?
Jha’Meia : (Hides face in hands) Oh, gods… what have I done? I never should’ve let Sephiroth come near my comp…
Sephiroth : Cool… I go to the confessionary… Do I get to kill the priest?
Aeris : It appears you are confessing to… having sex in a church? (swings around to face Jha’Meia, who’s gone)
Jha’Meia : SHI’IANA!! (Finds Shi’Iana discussing Mesatenian Magic with Marron and drags her off) Have you got any manipulate materia? I need it now!!
Shi’Iana : Why?
Jha’Meia : Remember the story I wrote at your behest? The one where I sort of changed Sephiroth’s name to Sephiro and Aeris to Ayrees? Remember that one?
Shi’Iana : Oh, yeah. It was really romantic.
Jha’Meia : Well, romantic it ain’t at this moment, not to the male subject, that is. Sephiroth and Aeries, the REAL ones, are reading it now!!!
Aeris : (still looking through the DOC file) Gee… Jha’Meia paints such a lovely picture of you, Sephiroth! I wonder if you’re like that underneath all that mayhem and murder? Oh, how romantic this is!
Sephiroth : @*(&#&@#(#!!!!!!!!! (turns and sees Jha’Meia has come back) JHA’MEIA!!!!!! (pulls forth masamune) SOMEONE is going to become ONE WITH THE PLANET this time!!
Jha’Meia : (holding up hands and backing away slowly) Remember I’m the writer and that’s just a frikkin’ story.
Sephiroth : ( holds up masamune - very very VERY threateningly )
Jha’Meia : Gawd…
Aeris : (running to Jha’Meia) I love your story! Can you write some more like that? Please? Pretty please?
Sephiroth : Stand out of the way, Ancient, while I dispose of this… writer.
Jha’Meia : (almost quavering voice) I’m going to call for Katherina!!
Sephiroth : ( lowers masamune ) Dammit!!
Jha’Meia : Besides, you fared better in that story!
Sephiroth : Damnation, you are as twisted as Hojo!!
Aeris : Sephiroth! She’s not! She’s a nice person who writes lovely romantic stories!
Sephiroth : ( puts away masamune ) I’m leaving. ( disgusted face as he stalks off )
LATER…..
(Vincent and Laguna, getting along quite well, come into the study and see the still powered-on computer)
Laguna : Ah, so Jha’Meia left her computer on! I wonder what’s this file.
Vincent : It appears the opened document contains variations of Sephiroth’s and Aeris’ names. Like Jha’Meia was trying to write a story concerning them.
Laguna : Yeap… ( looking through the file ) Must’ve been Jha’Meia all right. Shi’Iana or D’Brah don’t write stuff this good. Let’s see if we can find something else to open. How about this one?
Vincent : Perhaps we should not intrude upon the privacy of our friend.
Laguna : She won’t mind.
( Both of them read the document they opened. Jha’Meia walks in and they both stare at her. )
Jha’Meia : What now?? I know it’s a variation of Sephiroth’s and Aeries’ names, okay?? It’s just a totally orginal story and has nothing to do with them whatsoever!!
Laguna : … … … …
Vincent : Dare we have the courage to ask you who is Vincenzo Lagoon whilst you are in this mood?
Jha’Meia : AAAAUUUGGGHHHH!!!!!!