Candide discovers UNIX

Candide discovers UNIX

Day 1

Oh joy, oh joy. There is a package called MATLAB running on a SUN computer which it will do lots of tricky calculations for me. The SUN uses UNIX -- that's a leading operating system so it must be good.
So far it's just like all the other systems I know. I can't find a free terminal and haven't been able to log on yet.

Day 2

I can log on through the network. I have discovered a MAIL command for reading messages I'm sent. Haven't worked out how to send mail yet. Also someone told me about a command called MORE for reading files. At the end of each screenful it says "More?" and beeps; then my terminal goes crazy. Sometimes it does it after every line. Still I won't have to read many files as I haven't got any yet.

Day 3

I'm learning fast. I can examine files using a command called LS which I can easily remember because it stands for List - um - Something. Someone kindly copied some files over for me using CP. Then we found I'd got the wrong 'shell'. What's a shell? They don't have a HELP SHELL, or HELP ANYTHING. "You can be sure of shell." I also had the wrong 'path'. Anyway they've built me another one. The network is a bit slow but I suppose they're not used to having more than one person on it at once.

Day 4

I'm ready for the big time. Typed MATLAB. Seems I'm in the wrong directory now. Finally got into it (CD, easy!) and discovered that it spews out random garbage at me. I was supposed to tell it that my terminal is a BBC micro -- I do this by typing TEK. Simple, eh? Apparently it thought I was logged on to a toaster or something. Now to learn about creating files.

Day 5

They gave me a UNIX manual but it didn't have anything useful in it except some details of available editors. I'm advised to use VI (whatever that means) because it's not as bad as the other ones. Discovered that you input lines by typing I. You then type ESCAPE to stop inputting. Then you discover that this doesn't work on a BBC micro, so you hit BREAK, which also doesn't work. However you can move up, down, left and right with the alphabetic keys (H, J, K, L). L stands for Right. It's quite a game of skill moving to the correct line.

Day 6

I've created lots of files. I don't seem to be able to delete any yet. There is a command called MAN, so I tried MAN FRIDAY, MAN POWER and all the other possibilities. I think it stands for MANUEL. "I know nar-thing." This seems to be the entire HELP available.

(Later) Oh OF COURSE, it's RM. I should have guessed. What else would you type to delete a file? Still struggling with VI but I have got a program to run and put the output into a file. Now all I have to do is LPR the file and it comes out on the laser printer.

(Later still) Well for some reason the first page comes out reduced to 1/4 size and back to front but they tell me this always happens and the trick is not to read the first page. The queueing system is simple: if anyone else is printing when you type LPR, your output gets lost, so you wait for them to stop and then make a dash for it.

Certainly it's been an exciting week. No wonder UNIX is a world best-seller.

Jonathan Partington, 1988 1

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