oz tour

A picture tour of Jess and Hannah's trip to, galavant around and scurry from, Australia.

'Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking, the in-flight movies being shown on the flight are 'The Wind In The Willows', and 'The Wind In The Willows' Widescreen.'

Jess and Hannah board a plane to Australia,
unaware of the disaster that awaits them...

Jess and Hannah land in Singapore airport,
drink hot chocolate and check out the local gadget shops.
(If you look through the indoor ferns on the top-left of
the picture you will see a gadget shop.)

'Woah, so it's a minidisk player and a hot chocolate maker in one?'

'Hey, you guys, look!' Cartman pointed to the trees.
'What's that? A building?' asked Jess.
'It looks like... a Post Office!'

The girls jump out of crashing plane and land in the ocean. If you look very hard at the top right-hand corner of the picture you can see Patrick's Island.

They manage to paddle in a dinghy to the Great Barrier Reef and paddle in to shore.

'Wait a minute, how did you get here? You didn't walk over the reef, did you?' 'NO!'

'Guys… what is this turtle doing to my leg?'

They get to shore near Cooktown and sleep on the beach for the night without realising the place is a habitat for turtles. KILLER ONES! Only kidding.

They make their way through the bush in a 4 by 4 and then a limousine, narrowly avoiding a dingo.

Everyone turned around, including Hannah, consequently almost running into a tree. She was slowly getting the hang of driving but the clutch was still proving to be a problem. The deserted, straight roads through the bush were an excellent training ground.

Jess began to wake up as they entered the outskirts of Brisbane. Slowly it got brighter and brighter as the few isolated houses turned into streets of housing which turned into shops and businesses. Jess looked out the right hand side of the car as they stopped at traffic lights. She could see the centre of Brisbane – full of about a dozen skyscrapers and tall buildings over the river. It was beautiful.

Jess and Hannah drive into Brisbane and stay the night in The Novotel hotel.

The next day Hannah goes shopping in the centre of Brisbane and Jess has fun in the library.

The librarian got up and walked over to her, lifting a card which said: 'PLEASE LEAVE THE LIBRARY; YOU'RE BEING TOO NOISY.'.
Jess stood up; turned the card around and held it up to the lady.
She covered her mouth and ran out of the room.

'Hmm…' sighed Hannah as the water lapped over her bare feet.
'Aw, Christ, put your shoes back on, Jesus!' Jimmy moaned, holding his nose.
'Ah, p*ss off.'

Everyone gathers on the fake beach in the centre of Brisbane and a decision is made to leave for Newcastle.

Jess and Hannah travel by bus from Brisbane south to Newcastle, then get a taxi to the cheapest accomodation in the town...a shed.

20 minutes later the taxi screeched to a halt outside what looked like a shed. This was because it was a shed.

Everyone looked out to sea and saw a little way away, floating nearer, a block of ice with a solitary penguin standing on it. It waved as it went past.

Jess and Hannah decide it's time to go home. They get back in their dinghy and start paddling, but by mistake they go south towards Antartica and bump into a lone penguin floating on a sheet of ice.

After stopping on an island, unintentionally breeding dragons, moving on to another island by speedboat and getting on the dragons to fly off, they come down from the clouds for a breather and land on a skyscraper in Hong Kong.

The dragons began to descend. They landed one by one with a gentle thud and their passengers fell off onto the roof. 'Hannah,' Daniel said, standing up. 'You can let go of my waist now - we've stopped flying.' 'I think I'll hang on for a moment - for security,' she insisted.

'I think we're in Texas!' said Jess. 'Texas?! What makes you say that?' Hannah asked. The dragons flew past a signpost saying 'TEXAS'.
'Oh.'

Flying off on the dragons again they end up in Texas, gamble to get money for plane tickets and make their way to an airport on a horse and cart, not before extracting water from several cacti.

THE END

Getting to the airport, they board their plane home and fly off into the sunset back to England.

And there, in front of them, was the end of their travels.

 

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� Jess and Hannah 2005

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