Meanwhile, Jess was pacing
her room whilst Ian sat nervously on the edge of her bed.
“I'm bl**dy sick of this,” Jess declared. “I
travel to Australia for her. I jump out of a plane for her. I
drive through the bush, I fly on a dragon, I travel through time
and give up my life to live on an island...” Jess paused to
think. “AND I lend her money,” she added.
“And this is how she repays me.” She shook her head.
“It's sickening.”
“Maybe she'll apologise later on when she's cooled off a
bit,” suggested Ian.
“Ah, but will I have cooled off?” Jess asked.
“Frankly, I've had it.”
There was a silence.
“Had what?”
“It.”
“It being...what?”
“I dunno...'It'.”
“Right.”
Hannah was walking over to the Star Bar
with Zane and Brandon when she spotted Patrick sitting outside
the (locked) doors of the Casino.
“What are you doing?”
“It's locked!”
“Yes...I know.”
“But...It's...LOCKED!”
“Well obviously to
stop freaks like you getting in,” Hannah commented.
“You were once a freak like me.”
“Yeah, but I'm better now...I've been cured.”
“Obviously unlike him,” said Brandon.
“Looks like he's trapped in a sea of torment. A fragile
ecosystem of crushed inner being. A fantasy world of--”
“Yeah, yeah Zane we get the picture,” Hannah
interrupted.
“You're weird too,” Brandon said to Zane.
“Look, I may just be but a mere MTV presenter, but I feel
better in the knowledge that I don't have my wages paid by
teenage girls.”
“Hey, we have male fans too - we're a rock band.”
“Yeah, a poppy rock band funded by girls who prefer your
looks to your supposed 'talent'.”
Brandon just walked off.
“Wow, that was strange. There's normally at least a slap-up
involved if there's an argument in this book...I mean, island...on
this island.”
Zane looked at Hannah and raised an eyebrow quizzically.
“This islands like a metaphor for the hungry, blood thirst
random beatings of a boxer's red, padded fist with coverings of
materialistic--”
“Oh, zip it Zane.”
Jess was talking to the performer for that
night at 'The Jess-ter', Michael Smiley, and telling him where to
set up. As he departed, Jess looked over to a table where Dylan
and Kelly were arguing over rugby.
“Ireland.”
“Wales.”
“Ireland.”
“Wales.”
“IRELAND!”
“WAL--”
“My God, this sounds like an articulate conversation,”
commented Jess, walking over. “Haven't you two got anything
better to do?”
There was a thoughtful silence before they
both replied, “No.”
Jess rolled her eyes. “Well, I do.” She turned to talk to the stage
manager. She had just caught his attention when Zane and Hannah
walked in.
Hannah cleared her throat, but it was Zane who spoke, “Hannah wishes it to be known that she is not talking to
you.” He nodded; his duty fulfilled.
Hannah cleared her
throat again and stamped on his foot.
“OW! Hannah
also wishes it to be known that Patrick and Jimmy have
escaped.”
“WHAT?!” Jess exclaimed.
“You heard,” said Hannah. “OH!” She slapped her hand across her
mouth and in her outrage at herself she kicked Zane, who bent
over in agony and held his shin.
“So where are Jimmy and Patrick now?” Jess asked no one
in particular.
Hannah punched Zane in the arm. “Patrick's by the Casino
door and Jimmy's got a catapult...one that hurts.”
Jess growled and walked off.
“I think I handled that well,” Hannah concluded
happily.
“Oh yeah,” Zane squeaked. “Fantastically. “He
fell over, having had enough of pain.
“You know, we'd be
good together - very good.”
Patrick looked up at the approaching Jimmy.
“I want to kill Jess and you want the keys - well, Jess has
them - I know where they are. I could help you out of this.
Patrick, my friend, my arch enemy, but sometimes it's better to
keep enemies close by your side.”
“Keep your friends close, keep your enemies closer,”
agreed Patrick.
“So...do you want to help me in my mission?”
“Mission?”
“To kill Jess?”
Patrick frowned. “Oh...why do you want to kill her?”
Jimmy thought hard. “I can't remember.”
“Then...is it really necessary to kill her?”
Jimmy
thought again. “Yes.”
“But why? You've not got a motive.”
Jimmy was getting
confused. “Stop trying to distract me from my task,” he said,
accusingly.
“I'm not. I'm just curious why you have this obsession with
Jess - or, rather, killing Jess - when you've no reason
to.”
Jimmy couldn't think of an answer. Curses! To end the
conversation he pushed Patrick over into the sand and ran away.
Brandon sat in the Star
Bar, downing his sorrows with a pint of beer. Next to him sat
Kelly, the 'Welsh boy', doing the same thing but for a different
sorrow.
“What's your problem?” Brandon asked, downing the
little beer left in his glass and gesturing to the barman for
another.
“I've been outlawed 'cause I'm Welsh.”
“Ooh, harsh.”
Kelly nodded, staring to the bottom of his glass.
“You?”
“I'm apparently funded by teenage girls,” Brandon
sighed.
“Aren't we all...” said Kelly.
“Yeah...” Brandon looked up with a light in his eye.
“Yeah! We are! We all are! I bet his TV show
is mainly watched by young obsessed teenage girls!” Brandon
laughed. “Yeah! I'm gonna go and tell him that! I'll show him!”
Brandon got up from his stool and patted Kelly on the back.
“Sorry about the Welsh thing.” Brandon walked off
leaving Kelly on his stool, thrown out of 'The Jess-ter' by Jess,
for annoying Dylan, annoying Dylan!
Maybe Hannah would be sympathetic. That's what he'd do, he'd find
Hannah! Kelly jumped up and headed for the door. He found Hannah
just outside with Terror the Tiger, trying to teach him to sit.
“Sit, Terror! SIT!” Hannah commanded.
“No...no...don't eat that parrot - SIT!”
“Hannah?” Kelly said, coming over.
“Yep?” said Hannah, pulling the parrot corpse from
Terror's mouth.
“Jess kicked me out of her club.”
“Why?”
“She said I was annoying Dylan.”
“Were you?”
“Quite possibly...but it's not fair!”
“Why don't you come with me? I've just realised that I
haven't seen Toby or Tyke for a while...I'm going to the llama
pen.”
“Well...ok,” said Kelly. “But no Welsh gags,
ok?”
“What?”
� Jess and Hannah 2002