Instinctively, Jessica�s hand flew out, steadying herself against the door. Her legs were shaky as a wave of nausea overcame her. Painfully slowly, her eyes travelled the length of the floor, stopping only briefly to examine the broken shards of glass which were spattered slightly with bright red blood. Her heart beat recklessly as her mouth contorted into an astonished scowl. Her lips were poised to emit a blood-curdling scream, but suddenly she was unable to make a sound.

She felt her throat constrict as the blood drained slowly from her face. Her whole body froze as she took in the sight of her mother�s crumpled figure, her face devoid of any emotion whatsoever. For a minute Jessica stood, staring in quizzical fascination at her mother�s helpless form. Butterflies swarmed her stomach as she suddenly noted the distorted angle of her mother�s neck.

Jessica moved with clumsy numbness, her legs extremely cumbersome as she made her way to the kitchen in search of the phone. Clumsily, she stumbled past the jagged pieces of familiar looking glass, flinching as she passed her mother�s silent body. She moved cautiously, half anticipating her mother would come roaring to life at any given movement.

Miraculously, she made it to the kitchen and reached for the phone, her body shuddering dangerously. She picked up the phone slowly, grasping it as though it were some foreign object. With stiff fingers, she somehow managed to punch in the correct digits. Her tongue felt like cotton as she nervously glanced back at the hallway. Desperately, she tried to swallow the uncomfortable lump that was rising in her throat.

�911. Hello?� a calm voice said through the receiver.

The voice registered in Jessica�s head, but for a moment she was unable to make a sound. �I�� she struggled. �My�She�s�� Jessica stuttered uncontrollably.

�Calm down Miss. Take your time,� the voice soothed.

Shakily, Jessica drew in a large breath and exhaled. As she did so, a strangled cry emitted from her throat. �I think my mother is unconscious,� she finally managed to croak.

From then on, the conversation was a blur. Jessica mumbled answers, somehow managing to choke out her address. As she hung up, her mind raced in contemplation of her mother�s current state and it�s far-reaching implications. She stood unmoving, staring dazedly off into space. Her thoughts were nothing but a jumble of images and voices as they raced around in her head. Jessica didn�t realize how long she had been standing there until a loud, authoritative knock on the front door startled her from her thoughts.

�Paramedics! Open up!� a loud voice yelled. Forcing her aching legs to co-operate she stumbled back towards the door with visible effort. This time, Jessica averted her eyes to the ground, concentrating on the debris of glass instead.

Finally, she opened the door, almost oblivious to their presence as they quickly brushed past her. She saw and heard nothing as they barked orders at one another, quickly going to work on her mother.

Jessica stood stock still, unable to grasp the enormity of the situation going on amidst her. Her mind raced in maddening circles, making her dizzy in the process. Through the dense haze of confusion occupying her mind, she heard a voice, calling to her from a distance it seemed.

�Miss?� the paramedic repeated waving a hand in front of Jessica�s face.

The movement snapped Jessica from her trance. The room suddenly had a foreboding feeling to it as Jessica�s eyes focused on the paramedic. As she did, she felt her breath catch. The expression on his face gave everything away. She turned away quickly, unable to look at him as he spoke. She fidgeted nervously with a lock of her hair, barely paying attention to what he was saying. However, she was vaguely able to decipher the words �alcohol and bad fall� from his speech.

�I�m very sorry Miss,� he said in a practiced manner, making it strikingly obvious that he had said the words many times before.

Jessica waited desperately for the feelings of remorse or sadness to take over body. She waited as the paramedics covered her mother and quickly moved past her with contrived, sympathetic looks upon their faces. Even as the wailing ambulance departed her driveway, carrying her mother along with it, Jessica was still waiting.

Nick sat at the kitchen table staring blankly at his mug of now cold coffee. He sat alone, her words resonating clearly in his head, the volume escalating with each passing second. With a shake of his head, he stood quickly and marched determinedly over to the sink. He could spend hour upon hour analysing her words if he chose to, but it wouldn�t make any difference. He�d just make himself even more confused, if that was possible.

Sullenly, Nick watched the coffee in silent fascination as it swirled about the sink before slipping down the drain. The coffee mug now empty, he remained at the sink staring off blankly into space.

�Because I don�t even understand it myself,� she had said. The words had been said with such simplicity, yet to Nick they were so confusing. If only I knew what she meant, he wondered. Somehow however, Nick had a sinking feeling that he would never understand the hidden message behind her words. It would remain a secret forever.

Nick�s trance-like state was suddenly interrupted by the offensive jangle of his phone, which cut through the silent air like a sharp knife. He moved towards it slowly. He no longer raced for the phone with the same anticipation or elation as he used to. Every single time his phone had rung this week, it hadn�t been her. He had no reason to believe this phone call was any different.

�Hello?� he muttered with a tired sigh. No response. Nick listened intently and faintly heard the sound of light breathing on the other end. A slight shiver raced up his spine.

�Nick?� she finally whispered with scared desperation.

�Jessica,� Nick breathed, his heart pumping furiously. Silence ensued as Nick desperately tried to get over his initial shock. His lips were pursed to speak, but she spoke first, catching him completely off guard.

�She�s dead Nick,� Jessica said softly.

�Who?� he asked wearily.

�My mother.�

Another bout of silence ensued. �I�ll be right there,� he finally managed to utter.

Nick stood on her doorstep, unaware and unsure of what awaited him beyond the familiar glass doors. It was difficult to gauge Jessica�s emotional state from the phone. Surprisingly, there had been no sorrow or regret in her voice. She hadn�t sounded miserable or even the slightest bit upset on the phone as one typically would when they lost a loved one. However, there had been an almost imperceptible desperateness in her voice that led Nick to believe that despite her nonchalant attitude, she was secretly very scared.

Nick hadn�t found it strange that she had called him in her time of need, despite the current fragile state of their relationship. To him, it only seemed natural that she had reached out to him. She knew he would be there without a moment�s hesitation and so did he. At that second, what had happened between the two of them didn�t seem important at all. All that mattered was that she needed him.

Carefully, he reached up and rang the doorbell, listening as the chimes echoed hollowly throughout the house. He waited patiently for her to open the door and found himself slightly alarmed when she didn�t. The situation bore an uncanny resemblance to what had happened a week ago. Nick felt himself shudder involuntarily as the memories flashed before him. His eyes flew open immediately. It couldn�t happen again. He wouldn�t let it.

Instinctively, he clutched the ornate brass doorknob, thoroughly surprised as the door miraculously opened. His eyes scouring the house wildly, he instantly noticed the stifling eerie aura about it. �Jess?� he called, his voice resonating throughout the silent house. He waited for a response, worried, but nevertheless undaunted when he didn�t receive one.

He moved with uncertainty written upon his face, but a remarkable sureness in his step. A flood of light emanating from the kitchen caught his attention and quickly compelled him towards it. Nick moved confidently, as if controlled by some unforeseen force.

As he entered the kitchen, his heart skipped a beat as he felt his breath catch. There she stood, her back towards him as she gazed out the window. He stood staring forlornly for a few moments contemplating how to approach her. Even from a distance, Nick could tell from her posture that she was troubled. His heart went out to her as he began moving towards her quietly.

His muscles were tensed as he moved but he quickly relaxed as he drew nearer. Comfortingly, he placed a gentle hand upon her, immediately sensing the tension in her body. Protectively, he wrapped his arms around her drawing her body to his. He felt her instinctively collapse against him as her arms encircled his waist, grasping onto him tightly.

They stood exactly like that for hours, silently cradled in each other�s arms. It didn�t matter to either one of them that there was so much left unsaid between the two of them. All that mattered was that they were together. The rest they could deal with later.

Nick let out a frustrated sigh as he watched Jessica pass him quickly on her way to the bathroom. Aside from the occasional glance or accidental brush of their shoulders, Jessica had been purposely avoiding him for the past two days. In fact, they had barely talked to one another. Each time Nick had tried to broach the subject of her mother�s death. Jessica had blatantly refused to discuss it. Before he was able to get a word in edgewise, she would retire to her room and stay holed up there for hours on end.

The only reason Nick had opted to stay was because he knew how much Jessica needed him. Despite the wall she had built up around herself, he knew that inside she was hurting. He also knew that without any forewarning, the wall could come tumbling down. If there wasn�t anyone to save Jessica, surely she would be buried beneath the rubble.

Nick had spent the past two days sleeping uncomfortably upon the sofa in the living room. Every night he had stayed up until the wee hours, his body aching to go upstairs and just hold her in his arms. Despite his rampant emotions, he had managed to control his impulses.

He hadn�t broached the subject of their relationship partly because he didn�t want to overwhelm her. It was becoming increasingly difficult however, especially when he watched helplessly as Jessica walked past him without saying a word. The distance between the two of the was absolutely killing him. He felt like a part of him was missing and would continue to be until he made things right again. I have to do something and soon. I can�t take this anymore.

Nick�s train of thought was suddenly broken has he heard the bathroom door open and soon saw Jessica emerging cautiously from the hall. He watched her movements carefully, desperately trying to gauge her reaction in any way possible. saidJessica walked, staring off into space as though she was oblivious to his presence. As soon as Jessica spied him upon the sofa however, she quickly turned and began to head in the opposite direction.

�You can�t avoid me forever you know,� Nick whispered soft enough not to startle her but with enough emotion that it forced Jessica to stop in her tracks. He watched, his heart beating perilously as ever so slowly she turned to face him.

�I know,� she whispered back wearily. These past few days had been utter torture for Jessica, pretending that she didn�t notice Nick�s presence or see the inquisitive expression upon his face as she passed him quickly. It was becoming quite difficult to ignore the feelings of longing that were slowly building up inside her. To say that she missed Nick was an understatement. It was unbearable not having him in her life and now Jessica was at point where she wasn�t sure how much more she could take. Her resolve to be strong was slowly crumbling.

�Please Jess. Talk to me, � he beseeched.

Jessica gazed at him forlornly, struggling desperately to remain calm. Unsure of what she was getting herself into, she slowly walked towards him, her eyes averted to the ground. She bit her lip in consternation as she squeezed awkwardly between the table and the sofa where Nick was sitting. A slight tingle raced up her spine as she sat down next to him. Quickly, she inched her way into the corner of the sofa trying to create as much distance between the two of them as she could.

Nick watched her carefully, noticing her nervousness and discomfort. Sitting next to her suddenly brought about a swarm of memories of the happy times the two of them had shared with one another. Looking at her now, Nick realized again just how much he had missed her. �I missed you,� he said softly, voicing his thoughts.

�Me too,� she returned almost inaudibly.

Slowly, Nick�s hand crept forwards her, searching for hers. In his eyes both hope and longing were evident as his hand gently covered hers. He was slightly taken aback however, as Jessica quickly withdrew her hand as if his was scalding to the touch. He watched in silent confusion as her eyes began to brim with unshed tears. �How did we ever let this happen to us?� he asked suddenly.

Jessica flinched noticeably at the sound of his voice which was tinged with both hurt and frustration. The last of her intentions had been to hurt him.

�I�m so sorry Nick,� she whispered as the tears began to course slowly down her cheeks.

�Are you really?� She flinched again, his words like a knife to her heart. Through her tears she was able to see his face. Gazing at it, she sadly noticed that his eyes had now become a dull blue. They lacked their usually warm sparkle and the compelling sense of hope which had drawn Jessica to him in the first place. His complexion was sallow and dark circles marred his face. If possible, Nick looked as though in the past week he had aged.

�Why did you leave?� he questioned hoarsely, his brow furrowed in confusion.

The room began to spin around her yet again as she fought to collect her bearings. Fervently, she took in large gulps of air as she tried to calm herself. �I had to,� she finally managed to choke out.

�You had to?� he repeated almost to himself. �I don�t understand.�

Of course you don�t, she mused to herself. How could she expect him to understand something that she herself after hours of contemplating wasn�t even close to comprehending. �If I didn�t leave, you would have eventually left me,� she tried to rationalize through her tears. �Don�t you see Nick? I was scared. Scared that just like everyone else in my life you would inevitably betray me. I couldn�t deal with that,� she said her voice escalating as it gained emotion. �You�re the only person I�ve ever truly cared about Nick,� she said, her voice intense. �I thought that if I was the one that left maybe it would hurt less,� she brokenly as the salty tears continued to cascade down her face. �Only it didn�t Nick. It hurt so much more,� she added in a whisper before she buried her face in her hands.

As Jessica�s body shuddered with sobs, she was unable to control herself. Slowly, she wrapped her arms around herself, rocking her body back and forth as she tried to console herself. She couldn�t bear to look at Nick at that moment for fear that he was upset with her. Nothing would hurt her more then seeing the pain which she had inflicted upon him in his in his eyes.

Nick watched Jessica, his heart breaking as her explanation resonated in his mind. Gently, he reached forward gathering her in his arms. Holding her body close to his, he held her tightly as he gently stroked her hair. He waited patiently and eventually her tears subsided but her body continued to shake. �Jess,� he whispered in her ear. �Look at me.�

Wearily, Jessica looked up at him. His expression was both tender and warm as he spoke. �I promise I will never leave you.� His words were so simple and said with such emotion that it touched her heart. As his blue orbs gazed back at her lovingly, she began to wonder why she ever doubted him. �Even if we aren�t together Jess, � he began hoarsely, �I�ll always be right here,� he said reaching forwards and gently placed a hand on her heart.

�I know, � Jessica whispered back at him, her eyes brimming with tears. As she said the words, she buried her face in his chest, wrapping her arms tighter around his body. They sat there clinging to one another silently as if they had just found each other after a long time and were unwilling to part from one another. In their hearts, they both knew that was exactly what had happened.

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