The week had progressed slowly. Her mother�s death was announced in the local paper, sparking an onslaught of flowers, cards and people calling to express their condolences. The flowers were promptly thrown out, the cards remained untouched and all phone calls were politely fielded by Nick. Neighbors had stopped by, claiming that it was such a shame that something so tragic had happened to �such a wonderful woman.� Jessica had been tempted to slam the door in their faces and probably would have too if Nick hadn�t forced her to be civil.

Today, as the musical chime of the doorbell sounded, Jessica�s face contorted in annoyance. Immediately, she turned about face, hoping that if she walked away the chime would just miraculously cease. As the incessant melody continued though, she knew there would be no such luck. With an exasperated sigh she looked around for Nick, hoping to find him and cajole him into opening the door for her. She was hardly in the mood for a series of inevitable questions about her mother�s death. Unfortunately, he was no where in sight.

Tiredly she opened the door, her face plastered with a forced smile. As the door swung open however, her smile quickly faded. Surprise registered briefly upon her face but quickly changed to disdain as she recognized the woman on her doorstep.

�I just heard. I came as quickly as I could, � the woman spoke rapidly. �How are you Jessica? You look terrible you know,� she said breezing past her as she invited herself into the house.

Jessica watched in astonishment as her aunt quickly began removing her jacket. � I can�t believe this happened. Such a shame,� she said with a shake of her head. Without even giving Jessica so much as a chance to respond, she practically threw the jacket at her. �Thanks dear,� she said with a toss of her hair.

With a weary grimace, Jessica hung her aunt�s jacket in the closet. At the same time, she tried desperately to compose herself and hide the distaste that was written all over her face.

Jessica had never been fond of her aunt. She was superficial and uncaring and had always treated her coldly. Jessica hadn�t seen her in years and had secretly asserted to herself that she never wanted to see her again.

Turning back to her aunt, Jessica forced a small smile. She opened her mouth to speak, but was cut off as her aunt�s overtly emotional voice rang throughout the air. �Imagine coming home from vacation and reading in the paper that my little sister is dead. You can�t imagine how upset I was,� she said, swiping at her eyes despite the absence of any tears. Jessica felt her stomach churn as she watched her aunt�s charade with disgust. She was well aware that her aunt and her mother had never been close. In fact, they rarely even spoke to one another.

�Let�s sit down dear. We have so much to discuss,� her aunt suggested, her face plastered with false emotion. Without waiting for any acknowledgement from Jessica, she started down the hallway. Jessica followed suit, cringing with disdain as her aunt stopped briefly to examine her own reflection in the hallway mirror.

They entered the kitchen and found Nick sitting at the kitchen table, finishing off his breakfast. Jessica hadn�t come straight out and asked him to, but there had been a mutual understanding between the two of them that she needed him there with her. Since their reunion, he had moved up to her room to be with her. Jessica was grateful for his presence, especially at night, when she was unable to sleep. Although her mother was gone now, she still had recurring dreams about her coming to attack her.

As Nick saw them, he quickly rose to greet them. �Who do we have here Jessica?� her aunt asked with a knowing smile in Nick�s direction.

�This is Nick,� Jessica said, her mood broken momentarily as she beamed with pride. She watched as they shook hands and exchanged pleasantries. Her contempt returned quickly as her aunt made herself comfortable and helped herself to some of the left-overs. Jessica watched, silently fuming as her aunt immediately began talking Nick�s ear off. Her pretentious manner and attempts to seem distressed over her sister�s death were so transparent. Jessica could see right through her. She knew her aunt well enough to know that she had some sort of ulterior motives.

The only positive thing about her aunt�s impromptu visit was that she had taken the liberty of overseeing all the funeral arrangements. Had it been left to Jessica�s discretion, the funeral would probably have been non-existent altogether.

As Jessica and Nick entered the ominous funeral home with her aunt leading the way, Jessica averted her eyes to the ground in attempts to avoid the pitiful stares of onlookers. She gripped Nick�s hand tightly, desperately trying to draw strength from it. She felt herself relax slightly when Nick looked back at her and gave her a re-assuring smile. The only reason she was here in the first place was because he had insisted that if she came it would bring closure. At this point however, she wasn�t so sure if closure was what she needed.

In typical fashion, her aunt had spared no expense for the funeral. Looking around, Jessica felt positively sick as she took in the lavish mahogany casket adorned with a spray of beautiful white roses. Their intoxicating smell was so heavy in the air that she almost couldn�t breathe.

Shooting her aunt a withering stare Jessica reluctantly followed her to the first pew, Nick in tow. Numbly she followed suit as her aunt daintily sat down. Jessica cringed in disgust when she noticed her aunt�s perfectly manicured nails and flawless makeup.

As the service started, Jessica stared ahead fighting desperately to tune out the voice of the priest as he spoke. To her, his voice sounded incredibly monotonous. It seemed as though an eternity had passed before he finally finished and her aunt sashayed up to the podium to deliver the eulogy. She felt her stomach churn as her aunt�s dramatic voice resonated throughout the room. She was nauseous at the sight of sombrely dressed onlookers listening intently as her aunt fed them lies about the wonderful person her sister had been. By the time her aunt finished, Jessica was sure she was going to vomit.

As the priest returned to say a few more words, Jessica�s mind raced. Quickly she was transported back to the world of pain and cruelty her mother had forced her to live in. All the shouting and beating was suddenly very fresh in her mind. The condescending remarks her mother would hurl at her suddenly all came flooding back. She remembered everything as if it were yesterday.

Hot tears stinging profusely at her eyes, they darted about the room. She could vaguely make out the priest�s face as he spoke. His words were completely indecipherable though as his mouth seemed to move incredibly slowly. Gazing around the room, she frowned in confusion at the sight everyone�s face as they listened to him carefully.

Suddenly, Jessica rose awkwardly from her seat. Stumbling clumsily, she managed to make it past an astonished Nick and embarrassed aunt. Oblivious to everyone around her and the quizzical stare of the priest, she shuffled towards the casket. Her movements were stiff and controlled as if she was being led by some unseen force. Tears streaming down her face, she stopped as she reached the open casket. Staring at her mother�s body with wide eyes, she spoke. �You never loved me, did you?� she asked her voice low and raspy. She stood there for a few seconds, her brow furrowed in consternation as if she were waiting for a response. �Did you?� she yelled, prompting Nick to jump from his seat. Within seconds, he was by her side, placing a firm hand upon her shoulder. �Let�s go Jess. Please don�t do this,� he whispered anxiously in her ear.

Roughly, Jessica shrugged his hand off her shoulder. �I hate you!� she screamed. �I hate you so much! You never loved me!� she continued loudly, causing a few astonished onlookers to gasp in shock. �Why didn�t you love me? What did I do?� she began babbling as sobs racked her body.

Instinctively, Nick reached forwards, his arms firmly encircling her. She thrashed about wildly, desperately trying to free herself from his grasp. �I hate you so much!� she screamed again as she pounded furiously on his chest. The tears streamed relentlessly down her face as she continued to squirm beneath Nick�s grasp, but with no avail. He was just too strong for her. Finally, she gave up and collapsed against him, burying her face in his chest. Jessica�s body continued to shake vehemently and her heart-aching sobs echoed throughout the room as confused onlookers stared at her. Jessica didn�t care though, because in her heart she was well aware that they could never truly understand.

Jessica lay, surrounded by the warmth of her comforter as the last of the guests left the house. She had lain there listlessly all day as she listened distractedly to the sounds of sober voices expressing their condolences.

After her outburst at the funeral home, Nick had immediately driven her home. The car ride was awkward and uncomfortable as neither spoke. They had arrived home and he had made her a steaming cup of herbal tea and then helped her into bed. Throughout the day, Nick had come upstairs numerous times to check on her. Each time she heard his footsteps upon the stairs however, she would quickly close her eyes and bury her face in her comforter. She didn�t feel like talking to anyone at the moment.

The only plausible explanation Jessica could come up with for her sudden eruption earlier on was that it was a result of her pent up emotions. She had never had a chance to let all the hurt and anger she�d been feeling out. Since the day she had found her mother, there had been no tears, no sadness and no remorse. Today was the first time she�d expressed her true feelings.

Closing her eyes, Jessica lay there willing sleep to overcome her body. She knew it was impossible though as images of her mother�s angry face danced throughout her mind. With a sigh, Jessica rolled over uncomfortably, wondering just how much longer everything would hurt and if the pain would ever truly go away.

[Next Chapter].[Table of Contents].