by nANCI mEEK 10/95 (to the tune "Mr. Postman")
SFX: MACHINE GUN NOISES/helicopter/echo w/"Put the gun down and come out with your hands up holding the commemorative stamps"
Wait! Oh God wait a minute Mr. Postguy - Wai-ai-aiai-ayt Mr. Postguy!
Mr. Postguy is that an Uzee? Are you a nutcase, was it too much caffeine?
You could go to jail a long time - And your last raise was only a dime
The world is a bad place to-day-ay! Alot of Crime and human Decay-ay
Mr. Postguy, is that an Uzee? Are you a nutcase? Was it too much caffeine?
You've been standing there a scarin' every body - You made us all wee-wee
You have to stop and mail these letters - Take some Prozac and then you'll feel better
Please Mr. Postguy put down that Uzee! Are you a nutcase? Was it too much caffeine?
Give me a break ......I have P. M. S. - And you're a jerk who's acting 3rd class.
You're wife's a tramp and your daughter is Bi-i - Are you disgruntled or really High-I
Postal glue from licking the letters - Lick the stamps and then you'll feel better
Mr. Postguy look and see - Is there a package from Ted Kazynski? He's been away a long, long time.
Did I mention he's a friend of mine?
You've gotta child a minute, chill a minute (chill a minute Mr. Postguy) Chill a minute chill a minute, Mr. Postguy - Now ditch that Uzee and split this Qualude with me (*REPEAT)
AD LIB to FADE FX: Machine Gun fire
*by repeat I don't mean repeat taking Qualudes, I mean you repeat the last three lines up to 5 times and then fade.
I'm OK Productions(c)