Monday, February 7th, 2005
Welcome to the new and improved website. Now I know this isn't the most spectacuar thing you've ever seen, but if you had seen the previous ones, then you'd appreciate this page a whole lot more. The only words I can use to describe the old page are "piece of ass". As you can see, this page is still under construction. When it's done, I hope it will be a lot more...point filled... than it is now. But until I have time to add more pages, with more features, and photos, here is a funny story I found to tide you over.

Lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they are not prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you Know me?? She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Williams. I have known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me.You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you are a big shot when you have not the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than an insignificant paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The Lawyer was stunned!

Not knowing what else to do, he pointed Across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?" She again replied, "Why yes, I do. I have known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster too. He is lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He cannot build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he also cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."

The defense attorney almost died.

The judge asked both counselors to Approach the bench, and in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you bastards asks her if she knows me, I'll throw your sorry asses in jail for contempt."

- Queen Ness