| As he offers a cold beverage, I think my career has reached its pinnacle. Never before have I been granted an interview of such worldly proportions�I must be cautious. We�ll start out with a few simple questions� Could you state your full name please? Kyle James Boisjoli. Where were you born, Kyle James Boisjoli? I was born in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Now that I�ve got him right where I want him, where any question I desire is mine for the asking, I�ll really let loose. Would you ever endorse a product? Yes, I think so. So you�re a sell out. No� I'd only do it if it was a product I liked�say, Mountain Dew. Mountain Dew is awesome. I wouldln't do it just for money, though. That�s good. Truly a patriot. Is COBRA KYE a different person than THE KYLE? Somewhat. THE KYLE is the Master of the Universe, whereas COBRA KYE is a rock-n-roller/poker player. They do share similar characteristics, though. As I look into his dark, fanatical eyes, I can only imagine a blazing inferno behind him, hair blowing theatrically back in Hell�s shadow, and a laugh that is inhumanly 3 octaves below normal� Why COBRA? Why not boa constrictor, or platypus? Because my buddy Drew made up Cobra, and you can�t change it once it�s out there. Plus, you have alliteration, same sound. (C=K, Cobra Kye). And it�s so fun to say: COBRA! Would you ever consider�a mullet? Yea�if I ever get a haircut, I�ll get a mullet for at least a week. I mean, why not? I�ve already got all the hair, I just need to cut some off. I�d like to see that. I bet you would. Do your parents ever liken you to Dee Snider, or James Hetfield? Neither. How bout Satan? No. Oh, you mean likened like compared to? In that case, one morning freshman year, I was dressed in all black, and when I came to breakfast, mom said �Good morning, Satan.� By the way, I�m not a Satanist. So you know. I�m skeptical. Most are. What�s the best thing about having illustrious, flowing hair? Definetely headbanging. No feeling can compare to flailing that big mop around. Also, when I ride my motorcycle in the wind, it blows and flows, it feels cool. How about the worst thing? People discriminating against you. Bastards. Yea, you said it, Jpod. That sucks balls. It�s my understanding you�ve been to OrLANdo. Please enlighten me. Me and Aaron Lassila went down to OrLANdo last summer and this spring break. It was great. We then proceeded to drive out to the coast, and surf for a few days at Cocoa Beach. So you and Strokin� are good friends. How�s that for ya? It�s good. Friends since kindergarten, formed a band, and now that I got my recording studio up, we work on original songs and record them. My favorite is �Til I Found You,� (The Super Nintendo Song). Why is 80�s music better than music today? I had this answer planned out, but I forgot. Wait a few seconds here. I patiently waited, as time flew and Cobra contemplated. It was rock n roll, man. It had meaning to it. Back then, a love song was a love song. It could be heavy and also meaningful/deep. None of this pansy BACKSTREET BOYS BULLSHIT. All they do is sing off a computer. They're hardly even real people, they're products that have been carefully crafted to make the large amounts of money for the producers that created them. In the 80's, rock was rebellious, it was cool. Word up, Cobra. They dressed like women a lot, didn�t they? Well... Yeah, I guess they did. |
| The Kyle: |
| Exclusive Interview with Jordan "Jpod" Wiklund |
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