Were's my husband gone??? thats what I keep asking myself every single day. Why did'nt I realise how ill you really were, I thought it was flu, I know how much pain you was in and I never listened to you, I just thought you were been a big baby, I never thought I was slowly leaving you to die, Ian I have to live with this guilt for the rest of my life. No matter how many say to me it wasn`t my fault, I couldn`t have known how ill you was, I know their wrong, I think some blame me in a way, but who can blame them cause there right arn`t they!!
But do people know how much in love with you I was, the first day I saw that amasing smile and twinkle in you big blue eyes I was in love, thats why I asked you to marry me, even though I had to ask you twice before, cause I was a bit drunk and you didn`t belive me so I asked you again in the morning when I was sober and you said yes! I was buzzing...
How quick things change sweetpea, who would ever have guest a few years later my world would be shattered, loosing you, well its broken me, now my days are always grey, even when the sun makes them look so bright and exciting, not to me, there the same dull grey days that I will have to look at every day, I only open my eyes because of our little boy, I thank god for giving us our son who is a little miricle.. To see your face when he was born I will always remember, you was buzzing to have a son, to be a daddy, you were so proud xx................ I`m greatfull to have had the chance of being loved by you, so I try to keep that thought and smile at the happiest memorys you gave to me, Thanks sweetpea for those preciouse memories and giving me your love, and our amazing little boy, who is so much like you, its like watching a smaller version of you its crazy babe... I have to go my love cause I would go on foever, and I feel the tears on the way, bye sexy eyes, we will be together again, I will join you when my time is ready, please wait for me...... Missing you more than words can say, my love for you will grow stronger.
All my love your heartbroken wife Karen xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx |
