| My Darling Ian, I would love to be able to write you a poem, but lets face it I am not as clever as you and Sara, so I will have to write you a letter from my heart. I have been thinking about you so much, I never stop thinking about you and I want you to know I love and miss you more and more each day. You are so much more to me than just a son, You are and always will be my best friend. I miss your frienship so much. I know that along the way, I`ve made some mistakes as your mam and I will always regret that, and I will always blame myself for not being there when you needed me the most but I want you to know that you were always loved and I was so proud of you. I am proud to have a son as wonderful as you and words can`t describe how wonderful you truly are. You are my baby, my youngest son, and such a wonderful son and friend to me over the years. I would give anything to have you back in my life. Just to hear you say "I love you mam" would mean more than anything. I miss your love so much. You and your two brothers, Garry and David, your little sister Sara are my world and I always thought I would always have you in my life. But on February 25th 2002 you passed away suddenly and left me here on this earth without you. I know in my heart, you are in a good place where everything is beautiful, no-one can hurt you anymore and there is no sickness, no sadness and you are with your beloved Nan and Grand -dad, who will watch over you until I can come to you. I have so many memories of life with you, to many to ever mention all of them. You were a brilliant baby, so lovely natured, always happy and smiling and what a smile you had,captured everyones heart especially mine. As you grew, you turned into a mischievous toddler, getting into all sorts of mischeif with Garry and David, oh God I had my hands full with you all, but I loved every minute of it. Then when Sara was born and you loved her to bits, you were so protective of her and the bond between you both grew really strong, she was very lucky to have three big brothers to look out for her. You all turned her into a tomboy. We didn`t have alot of money, but we had an abundance of love, happiness and lots of fun and laughter. I could write a book about your escapades, the things the four of you got up to. You never stopped being mischievous even when you grew up, still full of fun, loved to play practical jokes on people, remember the spider you but in my bed, you thought that was hilarious, (I didn`t) But you were just a normal boy growing up and doing the normal things boy`s get up to, there was never any malice in you. We had some really good times didn`t we? So much laughter, don`t laugh so much now that you have gone. You had lots of friends, especially the girls, who all thought you looked like the singer out of Wet Wet Wet. Do you remember the time we went on holiday to Spain and everyone made a big fuss of you, because of your looks, they all thought that you were the real Marti Pellow, what a laugh we all had, but you loved the attention, but you took it all in your stride, and poor Sammie (your girlfriend at the time) got really jealous and it finished your relationship, much to my disappointment. Yes I could go on for ever writing about you. I cherish all my memories of you. You were so loved right from the very beginning. I wish I could remember every single moment of your life, but I can`t, but I do remember the day you were born, your first day at school, your first date, the first time a girl broke your heart, when you fell in love, the way you stood up for what you believed in and the way you were always there for the people you truly cared for. You had the most beautiful smile and handsome face but above all of that, you had a beautiful nature to go with it. Yes I am proud of you !!! You are a son any mother would be proud to have, and I am glad that you are mine.!!!! I feel cheated that we didn`t get to say goodbye. I guess it isn`t really goodbye though because you will live on in my heart and in the hearts of everyone who knew you, I know in my heart that one day we will be together again in heaven and I know you will be there waiting for me. Until then always remember just how much you are loved and cherished and know we all miss you so much. I will never stop grieving for you, I love you my SON and I always will. Love You For Always And Forever Mam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx |
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