Military intelligence officials said last Saturday at a private press conference that America has nothing to fear from Afghanistan�s forces. The chances of invasion are unlikely considering how stupid the Taliban is. I mean, come on; think about the name Taliban. Doesn�t it just sound gay? I know I think so.
They�re not even in possession of U.S.A. caliber nuclear weaponry. What are they going to with Nukes that can travel a maximum of four miles? Oh, I know; maybe they�ll strap it onto a commercial airliner and use it to blow up New York. See if I care. New York sucks ass anyway. Or maybe they�ll just take their aggression out on some other country that�s in range of their wussy piss-poor missiles. Russia is kind of like America; maybe that�s their next target. Maybe their nukes are all duds anyway; they�re buying them from former Soviet Union Satellites, who suck ass and are gay as well.
�You better believe we�re gonna kick your asses!� said Colon Powell. �Now that we know Bin Ladin is behind this, we�re gonna kill every single Towel Head in Asia until you bastardfucks give him up!� He was, of course, speaking to Afghanistan, the Towel-iban specifically. This line of action is well appreciated, but they are few willing to kill innocent civilians.
This is where Texas comes in. Yes, the entire state of Texas is to be hoisted up by U.S. bad-ass transport planes and dropped onto U.S. ally, Pakistan (the other country that no one likes). Once on the ground, every one-toothed, shotgun-toting, beer-drinking, country music-appreciating, low-down, Texan sombich will run across the border and open a Texas-sized can of whoop-ass on those prissy little Arab bastards.
Of course, once Texas is dropped off, their will be no getting it back; there are lots of people that Texas would like to fuck up. They won�t be coming back until they�ve destroyed all of the countries in Eurasia that don�t speak hick. There are other advantages as well; Mexicans will no longer be able to immigrate illegally into America, given that the bordering country will be a baron wasteland. Yes, I welcome the complete and total annihilation of Europe and Asia, as well as America�s inevitable World Order. Fuck all you other wussy countries for even trying; your asses are ours. |
