| Day by Day |
 |
 |
| If you return to the Main Page, we hope that you will sign our guestbook. We hope to share the encouragement and kind words with Maria someday. |
|
 |
|
|
| 3/30/2006 Just in case you wonder, if you wait a week to buy plane tickets, even for two months away, they may go UP in price. That is a bit disappointing. We are still praying for God's wisdom on that one. Okay, pride comes before the fall. Today I was feeling so PROUD of myself for feeling all peaceful inside even with NO updates. I just prayed normally, hoped normally, very calm and peaceful like a lake on a still day. Then 4:30 hit. I guess I realized yet again there was NO update of any kind. I snapped. Yep, completely lost it. I cannot explain, but this frantic feeling just takes over, and I have to let it out and about to calm back down. I have now, so I am back to being the "cool cat" I was earlier. :) Aren't you glad? As I attempted a quiet time WITH my children at breakfast talking nonstop (not so quiet time), I read this verse. Read it several times since I couldn't hear myself think. Psalms 145:3, 9 "Great is the LORD, and greatly to be praised; And His greatness is unsearchable. The LORD is good to all, And His tender mercies are over all His works." I started thinking about God's greatness...His tender mercies...and most of all, how good He is to me. As I did, I thought, "Why not praise God for some of things you have learned through this adoption process, Reba?" So I developed a top ten list. They aren't really in any particular order. Some are more "deep" and "spiritual" than others. And I won't lie, I was really hoping that #1 would be how God answers prayers with a GOOD update. I guess it still can be, just for the future, not today. Anyway, here we go. 10. I have learned how to develop a website. I had tried it once upon a time with Hunter, and I think he is still 18 months old in the pictures. :) Now if I can just figure out how to get people to sign the guestbook :) 9. I have learned what NOT to say when someone is adopting. Like, "Wow! This process is going so quickly for you!" and "I am sure God is teaching you something through all this." (I am sure He is, but sometimes I am ready to stop learning :) And I don't really get offended. People don't mean to rub salt in the wound. It is just kind of like the end of the pregnancy when people kept saying, "Haven't you had that baby yet?" "Oh, you're still pregnant?" Fun things like that. 8. Both old and new friendships. Friends I have known for years writing me to tell me they are praying. And then the many new friends I have made via the Internet. When you share a common bond (the adoption process), you have your own little support group on days that you might lose it...like today. :) 7. Bible verses. As I have mentioned before, I know all of the Bible stories. I have read a lot of verses. Even tried reading it cover to cover, though I always fizzle out around Numbers. But I am for the first time seeing how many of these verses apply to my life. 6. My prayer life has expanded. I can now understand how you can be in the state of prayer 24 hours in a row...it is always there, in the back of your mind. 5. Parenting...I treasure my moments more now as a parent since I have learned what it is like to have a child not with you. I will try not to take for granted those bedtime hugs and snuggling on the couch we long to do with Maria. Plus I take a LOT more pictures to share with Maria. 4. The sacrifices of our family. They love us through the hills and the valleys in the process. My sister is sharing clothes meant for her daughter (born 3 days after Maria). And they wait anxiously with us. They don't sign much on here, but we know they love us. 3. A passport. I have a passport now. I feel so official. And I have learned geography. Like where Guatemala is, and what time zone Guatemala is. :) 2. All kinds of adoption terms. PGN, POA, dossier, family court, preapproval, BC...I have a whole new vocabulary now. 1. Answered prayers. Both past (finding out daughter) and future (bringing her home) We are blessed! |
 |
| Maria Elizabeth, 11 months |
| 3/31/2006 Apparently I get more and more wordy the longer I wait. I used to be able to get three entries easily on a page. Now I am squeezing in two. You better pray that this doesn't last too much longer. I will be writing chapters. :) Proof that God loves me: After a week of bubbling tests with kindergarten, April Fool's Day falls on SATURDAY. You have no idea what it is like to teach a class of kindergarten students on April Fool's Day. Okay, I was pondering these verses today: Matthew 6:9-13, "In this manner, therefore, pray: Our Father in heaven, Hallowed be Your name. Your kingdom come. Your will be done On earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts As we forgive our debtors. And do not lead us into temptation, But deliver us from the evil one. For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen." I especially thoguht of the part, "Your will be done." You see, I find myself almost getting ritualistic or trying to be "good" to please God so He will move the adoption forward. I know that sounds irrational, but I think it is pretty common to "bargain" with God. (I didn't say right, just common) I am just sneakier about it. (Like He doesn't know every thought and motive I have.) I think to myself, "Maybe if I don't check my e-mail, God will surprise me." Or "If I pray about this for this amount of time, I will see an answer." The bad thing about that (besides the fact that it doesn't work :) is that I have made this situation about me. Not him. It is supposed to be "Let YOUR will be done." Not "Let my will be done exactly when I want it." So please pray that I will be more willing to turn my heart over to Him and let HIM do His will...and accept that it isn't mine. On a more positive note, I made it to 5 without that panic going off like yesterday. And that is pretty good, especially on a Friday when I know there will be no update earlier than Monday. So thank you to God for showering me with your peace. One more prayer request...please pray that our pre-approval will come without my having to contact legislators. I know that is usually a powerful tool, but I want God to shine through this sitatuation, not a person. However, I will willingly do it if God requires that... |