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| 3/20/2006 Hello! Welcome from cold, wet Northwest Arkansas. Once again, do plan for tomorrow...you don't know what the weather will be like! (Okay, that may be a bit of a twist on the verse) So far most of the plans I had for spring break are NOT working out. I don't know if God is preparing me for something with Maria's case...if so, I am getting a little nervous. Things NOT working out seems to be a common theme. I know, I know, God is with me...no matter what. Which brings me to my verse. Psalms 23:1-3 "The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul; He leads me in the paths of righteousness." Probably one of the most common verses to hear from Christians and even non Christians. I remember growing up thinking that first verse was funny. The way I heard it (as a child) is "The Lord is my shepherd I shall not want." As in I don't want the shepherd. I never understood that. Well, eventually I have grown and matured somewhat, and now I realize, I don't have to want for anything (my needs anyway) because God is my shepherd. He is taking care of me. He is making me lie down in green pastures. Interesting, isn't it? He MAKES me lie down. I am not wise enough to know to do it. I get so caught up in the human world, what is or is not going right. What might or might not happen tomorrow. I would just walk right on through that green pasture and miss a good meal. He leads me beside the still waters. He isn't leading me to the stormy seas, though it feels like it sometimes. He is leading me to the still waters. And if it does get stormy (like NWArk tonight!), He is right there to calm the sea or me...whichever He chooses. He restores my soul. Ever need that? I do. And with this adoption, probably even more so. It is easy to let my soul be disheartened. We thought we would have our sweet daughter home with us by now. But even though things are not working out as I had hoped, He is restoring my soul daily. Today was a day of prayer. I have felt like God was impressing on me to spend one day a week in prayer (as much as is possible with life going on :) I do pray all week, but just to have that one day of prayer to focus on Him, the adoption, Maria, and other prayer needs. I can't say it was the most meaningful day of prayer I have had. It wasn't a "Mountaintop" kind of day. But I am thankful for that time, that He listens, and that He answers. Okay, benefits...what benefits? I will admit. It was a dreary day. It was cold and wet. But God daily provides the benefits. So, one is that Mark received a bonus (actually it was over the weekend). And we definitely will be putting some of it toward the adoption, which is a blessing. (After tithing of course, Meme) We are still in prayer about a possible trip with the kids to visit Maria. We are just praying for God's wisdom since we don't know when the adoption will be finalized. While we are praying for June, we know that God's time is not always ours. And we want clear direction whether we should visit. Another benefit was just enjoying the day at home. Please continue to pray for our little Maria's health and safety, and for our case to make some progress. Thanks! |
| 3/21/2006 Yes, I am posting a little early. I am in a bit of a funk today, so I guess I thought it might help me to express myself a little. Why am I in a funk? No particular reason. True, it is spring break, and currently it is 37 degrees outside with a chance of snow outside. Yuck! (And overcast for day two in a row) And I am ready for some kind of progress with Maria... And my son is in a funky mood which affects all of us. :) We are on spring break (or more like winter break), and I am trying to do something fun with the kids every day. Yesterday was a bit of a surprise, since I had thought we would be in Kansas, so I didn't really have anything planned. But we did go to Target to get a few things we needed, and we got Icees and popcorn for a snack/lunch...I let the kids eat them in the living room while watching a Dora movie (and hopefully learning Spanish). If you know me at all, that WAS special...we don't typically let the kids have any kind of food or drink outside of the kitchen. Well, today I had planned on going to this Airport Cafe here in Springdale that is pretty much sitting on the runway (small airport). With this not so lovely weather, I made a change in plans and decided on McDonalds with the indoor playground. Lauren was THRILLED. Hunter was not. He decided that wasn't good enough...he wanted donuts instead. I think about all those kids who would be thrilled to get to go anywhere, and my child is complaining about going to McDonalds? Needless to say, it hurt my feelings a little. Okay, a LOT. I don't expect any thanks from them (though it is nice when they do), but I also don't like having to listen to complaining when I am trying to give a gift. (I would much rather have been at home...) Which made me think of this verse. (Well I couldn't think of the exact verse, but happened to find it on another website...thanks, Tonya) Colossians 3:15, "And let the peace of God rule in your hearts to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful." Some days, it is easy for me to feel thankful. When the weather is beautiful. When I have had a delicious seafood meal. When we receive new pictures of Maria. Other days, like today, I think I am more like Hunter, just not as verbal about it. "God, I know I have a healthy family and a good roof over our heads, a loving husband, but I want Maria to come home NOW." I feel like saying sometimes. Or just whining, "Why aren't we getting that preapproval? How come this is taking so long?" (It is taking longer than a normal adoption process...but then who said we were normal?) Anyway, I can't say just reading those words took away all of those disappointed feelings...just that they are good words to ponder. Okay, so do I have any benefits to express? Yes. We ended up having a fun time at McDonalds. We went to the library. I found the cutest book to check out called "Go!Go! Maria!" It about one year old Maria who can speak both languages and just what her development is like at that age. We visited my Grandmother (GG) and she is doing well. And I am about to take a little nap. So even if the day is once again not going as planned, I can say, "God, we are thankful." (However, please don't stop praying or signing!) |