So my plan was to go to Chicago, meet some new okayplayers, hit up a gay club, then actually have something to write about. Ha. Ha. Not that I didn�t try�I think I was just kinda lazy that weekend tho. I even had helped but I fucked it all up. Before I left for the re last week, some nice person sent me a PM telling me to go to girlbar in Chi and that it was good. Well I get to Chicago and my dumbass starts thinking that the message said �DON�T go to girlbar..it�s NOT good��so the whole time I�m saying to myself damn I better stay away from girlbar�lol.
So anyway I didn�t get to meet any Chicago dykes�.maybe they were all out of town or hiding�knowing that I was coming to town ..lol. I ended up sitting in my hotel room Monday morning praying to the Dyke-Goddess-In-The-Sky:
Dear Dyke Goddess In The Sky (I�ll leave out the dashes cuz we�re on personal speaking terms now)
Please send a nice dyke my way very soon. I would appreciate this very much. She doesn�t have to be perfect..i just want a woman who does not wear men�s underwear and who doesn�t mind holding hands with me in public on a train full of Amish people. See I don�t ask for much. And I promise to be extra good. I will not walk behind women going up the stairs in the subway trying to look up their skirts when the wind blows anymore..i swear! Thanks for listening.
Signed,
Your favorite 70% dyke,
Really truly,
Damali
So hopefully D.G.I.T.S. heard me�unless she was off watching over an Ani DiFranco concert and was distracted�these things happen sometimes�
You know what else I noticed? The more I look for women the more I meet the most wonderful men. Not that I didn�t know they were out there cuz I know a lot of them but damn!! It seems like some cruel joke in order to distract me from fulfilling my ultimate mission of seducing all the women of the world!!!! (um ok..lemme chill on that�lol) I swear I�m starting to get worried about this quest that I�m on�spring is half over and what have I got to show for it..let�s do a quick update:
Cinda: still wants me but has no time
Mandy: still messing with that married guy�I�ll catch up to her when she wakes the fuck up
Kaya: haven�t heard from her in a few weeks..i suspect she�s a way for the summer
Lonetta: still flirting but I�ve lost interest cuz I recently realized she looks like a MAN!!! Oh! Oooooooohhh! � Sam Kinison
Kelly: never called me and I�m glad..something tells me that she�s only one catfight away from a hospital room
So there you have it. No current prospects. But I�m thinking of volunteering for some committee activities for the upcoming Gay Pride Weekend at the end of June�.so things may well improve very soon so I hope ( hook me up, D.G.I.T.S!)
So the score now is Dykes: 6 Me: 6�they get one point for managing to so deftly elude me in Chicago..(especially one..but that may be a story for another week�or not..we�ll see ;-))