| Why I hate RETAIL |
| Here are a bunch of stories about things that happend to myself, or some of my coworkers in the days of retail. Most of these are pretty old, but they still might be entertaining to read. And I'm still not really sure why I decided to write these in third person....but oh well. |
| Lindsey was toiling away at her recently acquired job as a cashier. "This isn't too bad," she thought as the first few weeks went by. Poor, poor innocent girl. One day, a very large, sweaty woman missing a few teeth came into Lindsey's line, with her equally fat and sweaty boy friend/cousin. While Lindsey scanned and bagged the woman's items, she couldn't help but notice that the woman, along with her "friend" both had shaved heads. The woman got out her wallet and noticed that she had left her wallet in the car! Oh dear! As her male compadre (lets just call him "Billy") went to the car to retrieve the required cash, the woman began a conversation that Lindsey was never able to forget. "I just got over another really bad case of lice, ya know," the horrid woman began,"that is why I had to shave my head." "Oh my god my blond hair!!" thought Lindsey in distress. "When I went to the doctor," the woman began again, "the doc said it was the worst case of lice that he had seen in his whole career! He even got some of his doctor friends to take a look." The woman persisted in her conversation, as if she were talking about a day in the trailer park. "Almost everyone I knows had to shave their hair off too. My mama did, my Papa, Billy, ma' grandma and gradndpa....My sister didn't want to shave her hair though, so she just cut most of it off....Hey! she use ta' have hair just like yours!!!" Lindsey forced a feeble little smile and hoped Billy would be back soon. The woman continued to talk about the different treatments she used to "cure" herself. Poor Lindsey, completely grossed out by the situation, must have given her self away with a horrified look on her face, because just as Billy came back, she said matter of factly, "Oh, the lice is all gone now." Sure it is. Sure it is. |
| One day, Stephanie was casually talking to Lindsey over her shoulder as the two girls were "working." Seffany, not paying attention, stepped on a stray hanger laying on the ground and slipped, almost taking a clothing rack down with her. The two girls laughed. It was great. ~A little bit later~ "Hey Lindsey!", Stefanie started as Lindsey walked up to her. "Remember that time I slipped on a hanger?!" "Yeah..." Lindsey said. "That was five minutes ago!" |
| Vicki and Steph were working "diligently" at the fitting room desk, folding and sorting all the crap...I mean clothes, yea...clothes. All of a sudden, they heard a woman's voice, talking to herself, coming from the fitting rooms. The woman, who was rather on the obese side, had brought a few baithing suits in the fitting room to try on. Apparently, she forgot about the two girls right outside, because she began to sing: "Miss AmmmmmmmmmmmeriCA!!! Miss AmmmmmmmmeriCA!" of course, the two girls could barely stifle their laughter, however, it would become harder for them because the woman continued to sing, and then added "No one's gonna laugh at me no mo' !" You go, Miss America, you go. |
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