"Okay, so let me get this straight," I told my brother, turning to him from looking outside the car window. "This girl made out with you, thinking it was me, then when she found out it was you she slapped you? And now she wants to call me so we can go out? I don't think so, Taylor." Was he nuts or just stupid?
"Why not, Zac? She's cute and she really likes you."
"I've never met the girl! I've never even seen her. Your definition of cute doesn't always seem to match mine." I was not one for blind dates, especially coming from a person who'd fuck anything with boobs.
"Why? I thought Nic was cute, I thought Amber was cute. I've been right every single time about a girl. Don't say that to me."
"You didn't give her my number, did you?" I asked.
"Of course I did!" Taylor said, looking over at me. I rolled my eyes and turned away to the window. "Oh, don't get mad at me because I think you should hook up with someone. Come on, she's hot and she's got huge tits." Yes, my typical older brother. Always thinking about the body. I used to be like that before.
"Is that all you think about?"
"Are you gay?" I rolled my eyes again. "You're the only guy I know who doesn't think about sex all the time. You haven't got laid since last summer! I mean, come on Zac, you've got a sexy girl waiting to be with you and you're looking at me like I'm hooking you up with Janet Reno or something. I'm trying to get you someone because you've been sitting around like a complete moron since Nic left."
God, why did he have to mention her? The conversation was bad enough without him mentioning her name. "We don't talk about her anymore, all right?" I said, tapping lightly on the mirror to the music on the radio. I'd picked up the habit when I began playing the drums, and Taylor finds it incredibly annoying. "Listen, Tay, I know you mean well here but I'm not looking for a relationship with anybody."
"I'm not asking you to marry her, Zac. Just fuck her. You need to get laid. Badly." Was that his mission here? Just to get me laid? If I wanted to get laid I had no problem getting it.
"I'm not like that anymore, Taylor. I don't fuck random girls just for the hell of it. You can do what you want with her. Just leave me out of it."
"I don't need a girl. You do."
"I don't need anyone! I don't need a girlfriend, I don't need to get laid, just leave me the fuck alone! God, Taylor, if I wanted someone I would have gone out and found her!"
"You're still hung up over Nic, aren't you?" I shook my head, faking my shocked expression. I could tell already he wasn't buying it.
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"You're still in love with her, so you want nothing to do with anyone. Dude, why don't you just call her? She'd talk to you, I'm sure about it."
"I don't know where you pulled that one from," I said. Why would he say that? I haven't spoken to anyone about Nic at all�even if I couldn't stop thinking about her. I couldn't get her out of my mind, more so lately. Now that the tour was coming up when summer started, my thoughts were drifting to her more than not. Would she even come? I doubt it, she'd probably stay home this year and I'd never get to see her again.
"You still should call her. If not, at least talk to her at the wedding."
The wedding. "Shit�" I muttered. Darling and Isaac's wedding. She'd be there. She was the maid of honor; of course she'd be there!
"Zac? I think you should�"
"I don't want to talk about it." The truth is, I did want to talk to her again. I wanted to see her and I wanted to be with her, but I didn't know how to get around to it. I've tried, maybe once or twice, to pick up the phone and call her when I knew she wouldn't be home so I could leave a message on her answering machine. But every time I picked up the phone, I couldn't bring myself to dial the numbers. I didn't have the guts to talk to her. How horrible is that?
"She's coming tomorrow," Taylor said, bringing me out of my thoughts. "She'll be with Darling all week."
"I said I didn't want to talk about it, Taylor. I don't want a girlfriend. I don't want Nic, just leave me alone."
"Fine. But don't say I didn't try."