<<<<-
My hands shook against the door as I pushed it open. He was here. I had known that when I came downtown this morning. I�d passed the hotel with all the groupies screaming, their signs and face paint smeared by the rainy drizzle. But downtown? When I was?
I flashed my security pass at the door guard before rushing toward the back searching for Ryan. I flipped the pass at the owner as I headed backstage.
�Did you get them?�
I turned around, finding Ryan disheveled and nervous, fidgeting with his distressed jeans.
�Yeah, they had everything set aside for you when I got there. All I had to do was pay and walk out. Still can�t believe you shop at Abercrombie. Why buy expensive clothes?�
Ryan shrugged, grabbing the bags I handed him. Pulling me towards his so called �dressing room�, he managed to bore me with preparation details. As soon as we walked into the room, the door closing behind us, he began stripping off his clothes, pulling things from the shopping bags.
I flopped onto the couch that took up one of the walls, allowing a smirk to cross my lips when Ry pulled off his sweater, showing off his toned abs.
�What�s with you?�
He turned to me, his new shirt half way to his mouth, ready to bite off the price tag.
How do you explain insanity? Okay, not insanity, just unprepared excitement mixed with confusion. I had expected to see him without him seeing me.
Had he realized it was me?
Did he even remember me?!
Of course I recognized him. Even with his baseball cap on backwards, blonde strains pulled haphazardly through the brim, I recognized him instantly. And he�d been wearing his glasses. He was even more gorgeous than I�d remembered - and I had posters in my bedroom to remind me at every moment.
�I ran into him.�
Ryan gave up on the tag, tossing it to me when I pulled a pocketknife from my jacket pocket.
�Him who?�
I broke through the plastic and threw the shirt back at him. How could he not know who �him� was?
�Him! Nick! I was coming back from Abercrombie and he knocked me down by accident.�
He looked up at me, eyebrow raised in curiosity.
�And�?�
And I averted my eyes and rushed away. And I�m a complete idiot. And I wanted to jump in his arms. And he didn�t recognize me. And he looked good enough to rape. And he caught me off guard enough that I wouldn�t have been able to pretend that I didn�t know who he was, what he does. And I now want to search the city so I can melt in his arms if he�d let me. And I don�t want to pretend anymore.
�And I left.�
Ryan gawked at me, laughter bubbling up from his chest.
�You left?! You�ve been talking about this guy nonstop since you were eleven! And even more since July. You see him again and you just leave?!�
Sitting up and leaning forward with my elbows on my knees, I felt tears begin to pool in my eyes. Why is he yelling at me? I was running his errands and he�s yelling at me for coming back in time for his show?!
�What the fuck do you want from me, Ryan? You know damn well if I had stopped and I had talked to him, you would have never gotten your clothes in time. I wouldn�t have made it back for your show if I�d given him enough time to talk to me.�
The smirk fell off his face.
�So you gave up the man of your dreams for me?�
I stared at my hands.
�I had an obligation to you Ryan. You�re my friend.�
He stared at me, wanting more.
I sighed.
�He�s a goddamn Backstreet Boy, Ryan! Why the hell would he want anything to do with me? Especially with all those barely dressed, ready for anything groupies hanging off of him? I was just a boring fling. It would have been a waste, if he�d even recognized me in the first place.�
Ryan shook his head.
�I wasn�t there, but just the way Xander and the others talk, he was looking at you like you were definitely more than a fling.�
�It doesn�t matter. The moment�s past. He�s gone.�
Ryan�s smirk returned to his face.
�After the show, I�m taking you to the hotel and we�re going to talk to my friend who works there, Craig, and you�re gonna talk to Nick. I�m not going to feel guilty for you missing out on a chance for �another day of bliss�.�
I snorted.
�I�m going to the concert tonight. That�s enough.�
�Nope, we�re gonna hunt him down. It�ll be fun.�
One