The Great PATRIOT Act ConspiracyThe Great PATRIOT Act Conspiracy
Liberal hysteria has been quite high regarding the PATRIOT act. Let's face it though, liberal hysteria isn't anything new. Hell, they'd be hysterical if it started raining dollar bills I'm sure. Anyway, you may think that the liberals (aka liebrals) have a good reason to be hysterical over the PATRIOT act, like taking away rights or some such silly nonsense. Of course, you'd be so wrong that I'd look at you and be all like "Damn you so wrong honkey!" You see, they don't care about any of that Constitutional crap. I mean for Christ's sake, it's not like this country was founded on a constitution anyway. No, the simple fact is that the liberals hate the New England Patriots*. This is simply because patriot means you love a country, and we all know liberals hate America. Now, I'm sure you never read this PATRIOT act because it's long and extremely boring. If you did, however, you would realize that the only thing is says is that the New England Patriots will win every Super Bowl they're in by law. The liberals want the act amended to say the following:
"In lieu of Super Bowl (hereby known as "breakdancing panda") victories, the New England Patriots (hereby known as the "New England Flagburners") must present de facto legal terms to King Edward Kennedy. However, the Broncos are allowed to win every breakdancing panda they're in. Go Broncos, go America, September 11th never forget!" We simply can't call them the New England Flagburners, because then the terrorists would have won!
*But hating the Patriots isn't such a crime, because I fucking hate those fucking fucks. You can tell because I used a naughty word three times.
