REASONS TO BE A CHEMIST
- All the coffee and pocket protectors you could want!
- Clark Kent style safety glasses. ( my chemistry teacher have really cool safety glasses!!!)
- Exposure to all kinds of toxic and cencerous substances.
- The "opportunity" to deal with irate clients asking "where are my
  results?"
- Access to 100% pure ethanol
- Knowing how to completely dissolve the bodies of your enemies
- You never have to worry about what you're doing on Friday night
    (You're working in the lab)
- Permanent goggle marks cheaper than a tattoo.
- You hope someday to be able to use the word "buckyballs" without bursting
  into a fit of laughter.
- You wish to be blamed for all faults in the environment.
- ditto for cancer
- You are adept at poverty cooking
- You prefer to get your course credits the hard way

In chemistry lab, one of my friend accidentally hooked up her bunsen
burner to the water line instead of the gas line.  She didn't realize it,
of course, until she turned it on.

During class, the chemistry professor was demonstrating the properties of
various acids. "Now I'm going to drop this silver coin into this glass of
acid. Will it dissolve?"

"No sir," one student called out.

"No?" queried the professor. "Perhaps you can explain why the silver won't
dissolve in this particular acid."

"Because if it would, you wouldn't have dropped it in!"

If you are just curious and want to know the real answer, it's because silver is a very unreactive metal.

This was a story told to us by our chemistry master at school. A female
student wished to make some potassium hydroxide solution (aqueous) and
decided to throw a large lump of potassium into a bucket of water. Her
professor observed what she was about to do, out of the corner of his eye
and hurried towards her, and after confirming this was what she was
intending to do, asked her first to stir the water in the bucket for five
minutes before adding the potassium. She was puzzled and ran after him to
ask the purpose of this action.

'It will give me time to get away' said the professor.

-potassium is very very very reactive!!!!

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