Matt Johnson
2nd hour

Matthew M.

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Matthew M., age 16, recently moved to Valparaiso from Ft. Worth, Texas. Matthew says that he doesn't like Valparaiso because "it's too preppy, swimming is required, the teachers are bad, theres nothing to do, and I miss my friends". Matthew is accustomed to moving, having lived in four different states. "I've had to move a lot because of my dads job", said Matthew with disappointment. He has lived in Arizona, where he was born; Texas; New Hampshire; and Indiana, where he currently resides.

Matthew is a little over 6 feet tall. He has long arms that hang near his knees when he walks because he always slouches. Today he is wearing his favorite sweatshirt and a pair of shorts even though it is less than 40 degrees outside. The sweatshirt is a soccer sweatshirt of some kind with a white figure kicking a ball into the net on the front. It isn't surprising however that he is wearing shorts seeing as how he wore them all throughout the winter and became known to some as shorts kid. "I love shorts, they're so comfortable and it's not really cold outside anyways", said Matthew defending his short wearing in such bad weather. Although he looks to some like he would be one of those tall uncoordinated kids, he is nothing like that. Matthew is very athletic and coordinated. He would never tell you that though. Matthew is the kind of person who will do something great and then say "could've been better". He played on the varsity soccer team and is currently on the division leading intramural Frisbee team.

"Matthew is a fascinating individual who is definitely unlike any other person you will meet in Valpo", says senior Laura Groth.
What a worthless paragraph.
Matthew has a passion for his computer, which he has named after himself. He spends countless hours online talking to his friends and updating his website, www.geocities.com/happymonster313. His website is all about his life and includes several sub-pages including a recently added friend's page, a pick-up lines page, and a page devoted entirely to kittens.

"Every time I get online, that kid is on. It's like he never leaves his computer. When his computer broke the other day I thought he would die, but fortunately for us he made it," said Matthew's friend Jamie Catania.

When he's not working on his computer Matthew enjoys tutoring for the boys and girls club, scoping out chicks, pumping iron, watching anime, and hang out with friends. "I like tutoring because of the pride I feel when one of my kids brings me back a paper that he did really well on and I know that I've really helped someone." Matthew stays up until the wee hours of the morning to watch anime on most days. Anime is a type of animation that originated in Japan. It is characterized by colorful art, futuristic settings, violence, and sex. "I watch for the sex", said Matthew jokingly. However, the late nights don't affect Matthew's study habits. He is an exemplary student. He maintains an above average grade point average and is a pleasure to have in most classes according to his most recent report card, even though he claims to hate school. The classes he enjoys include ITGS and physics. He dislikes everything else, specifically US History and math. "I hate the way my teacher counts off for ity bity mistakes or if I dont show my work and still get the correct answer she counts off", said Matthew angrily.

After school Matthew participates in Science Olympiad, Earth Awareness Club, the school soccer team, intramural volleyball, and intramural Frisbee. "We are doing pretty well (in Frisbee), but our two hardest games are Wednesday and Friday, so we will see," said Matthew. His team, The Metersticks, is 3-0 in a five game season. Our volleyball team is alright but we should be better. Their record stands at 3-4. Matthew loves the intramural sports here in Valparaiso, but feels that the Frisbee league was set up very poorly and cost too much. It costs more than two dollars a game and all they had to pay for was a few Frisbees. The league raised around 1,700 dollars from the teams.

In the future Matthew plans to be a Biology teacher. He enjoys teaching young children and would like to continue with it and make it a career. As for now, Matthew is just enjoying life and taking in everything that Valparaiso has to offer.

This article made possible by the mind of Matt Johnson, and the assignment of some lady who teaches a blow-off class that Matt's lazy ass took.

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