These characters do not belong to me. The song is Ol’ Red by Blake Shelton. I don’t claim the song in any way,
shape, or form. Except the parody is mine.
Ol Red
By Kenzie Kennedy
____________________**********************************____________________________
Inu-Yasha poked his head up from the well. He walked quietly up the steps and sniffed around outside before heading
to Kagome’s house. He reached it quickly and slammed the door shut behind him.
"Hello? Who is it" Kagome’s mother came out of the living room. "Inu-Yasha? Kagome’s not here; she’s at school."
Inu-Yasha looked at her sheepishly. "I know. I wanted-" He shook his head and was quiet.
"You wanted what?" Kagome’s mother asked.
"Well, Kagome sang a song from somewhere called Am-ir-ka..."
Kagome’s mother smiled broadly. "Oh, yes! She sang the revised version for me when she came home. It was very good."
Inu-Yasha stared at her. She smiled warmly at him. Maybe this wouldn’t be so hard. "The song was okay. I wondered if there were more."
"Kagome has some up in her room," she said. She abandoned whatever she had been cleaning and showed him up.
When she left, Inu-Yasha had a stack of CDs and some knowledge of how to work the CD player. "Okay, I put this in,"
Inu-Yasha delicate placed the CD on the circle, "put the lid down." The CD whirred. "I push this button and-"
Music poured out. Inu-Yasha listened.
Down in the kitchen, Kagome’s mother discarded something she had been humming when she started adapting the lyrics.
She shook her head. "I must be going crazy," she muttered to herself.
With a dog demon in the house and humming, "How much is that doggy in the window?" wasn’t a good decision.
Especially when it became, ‘How much is that hanyou in the window? The one with the firerat clothes?'
Upstairs, Inu-Yasha found one that he liked and was committing it to memory.
Well I caught my wife with another man
Well, I caught my miko with another man
And it cost me ninety nine
And it cost me fifty years
On a prison farm in Georgia
Nailed to a Goshinboku tree
Close to the Florida line
Close to Kaede’s village
Well I'd been here for two long years
Well I’d been there for fifty years
I finally made the warden my friend
I finally was released by a girl
And so he sentenced me to a life of ease
And so she sentenced me to find the shards
Taking care of Ol Red
That can stay, Inu-Yasha thought, looking down at his clothes.
Now Ol' Red he's the damnedest dog that I've ever seen
Now Ol’ Red he’s the... Inu-Yasha thought for a moment then shook his head. It’s sort of true.
Got a nose that can smell a two day trail
That can stay.
He's a four legged tracking machine
He’s a two-legged tracking machine. I don’t know what a ‘machine’ is but Kagome’s mother called this music thing a
machine. It can’t be a bad thing.
You can consider yourself mighty lucky
That can stay.
To get past the gators and the quicksand beds
To get past the humans and the youkai dens
But all these years that I've been here
But all these years that I’ve hunted
Ain't nobody got past Red
That’s true, Inu-Yasha grinned.
And the warden sang
And Kagome sang
Come on somebody
Why don't you run?
Ol' Red's itchin' to have a little fun
That’s right.
Get my lantern
Get my flashlight
Get my gun
Get my pack
Red'll have you treed before the mornin' comes
That can stay, too.
Inu-Yasha disregarded the rest of the song. There wasn’t much there to work with and he didn’t like how it told
about setting Ol’ Red up with another dog. He liked Kagome. Inu-Yasha blushed. Where did that thought come from?
Maybe he could work it in anyway.
Well I paid off the guard and I slipped out a letter
Well I waited for years and dreamed a lot of bad dreams
To my cousin up in Tennessee
Because of a miko Kikyo
Oh and he brought down a blue tick hound
Her reincarnation Kagome
She was pretty as she could be
Blushing, Inu-Yasha admitted to himself that the last line could stay.
Well they penned her up in the swampland
Well they penned her up in the village
'Bout a mile just south of the gate
‘Bout a mile just south of the tree
And I'd take Ol' Red for his evening run
She found Ol’ Red on her evening run
I'd just drop him off and wait
She set me free from the tree
And the warden sang
And Kagome sang
Come on somebody
Why don't you run
Ol' Red's itchin' to have a little fun
That’s right.
Get my lantern
Get my flashlight
Get my gun
Get my pack
Red'll have you treed before the mornin' comes
That can stay, too.
Now Ol' Red got real used to seeing
His lady every night
His lady every day. Is she my lady? Inu-Yasha asked himself a question. Even if she’s not, it sounds good.
And so I kept him away for three or four days
And so she kept far away for three or four days
And waited till the time got right
That’s all right.
Well I made my run with the evenin' sun
That, too.
And I smiled when I heard 'em let Red out
And I smiled when I heard her in the well.
'Cause I was headed north to Tennessee
‘Cause I was headed straight for her with glee
And Ol' Red was headed south
And Kouga was headed south
And the warden sang
And Kagome sang
Come on somebody
Why don't you run
Ol' Red's itchin' to have a little fun
Get my flashlight
Get my pack
Red'll have you treed before the mornin' comes
Now there's red haired blue ticks all in the South
Now there’s black-haired hanyous all in Japan
Love got me in here and love got me out
Kikyo killed me and Kagome saved me
Inu-Yasha repeated that to himself. I like it, he thought to himself. He scampered downstairs to sing it to Kagome’s mother.
She was waiting in the kitchen. Inu-Yasha shifted his feet back and forth until she noticed him. "Inu-Yasha, you
should have said something. What is it?"
"Um, I’m finished..."
She saw the hopeful look in his eyes that he was trying to hide. "May I hear it?" she asked.
Inu-Yasha brightened and started to sing.
Well, I caught my miko with another man
And it cost me fifty years
Nailed to a Goshinboku tree
Close to Kaede’s village
Well I’d been there for fifty years
I finally was released by a girl
And so she sentenced me to find the shards
Taking care of Ol Red
Now Ol' Red he's the damnedest dog that I've ever seen
Got a nose that can smell a two day trail
He’s a two-legged tracking machine.
You can consider yourself mighty lucky
To get past the humans and the youkai dens
But all these years that I’ve hunted
Ain’t nobody got past Red
And Kagome sang,br>
Come on somebody
Why don't you run
Ol' Red's itchin' to have a little fun
Get my flashlight
Get my pack
Red'll have you treed before the mornin' comes
Well I waited for years and dreamed a lot of bad dreams
Because of a miko Kikyo
Her reincarnation Kagome
She was pretty as she could be
Well they penned her up in the village
‘Bout a mile just south of the tree
She found Ol’ Red on her evening run
She set me free from the tree
And Kagome sang
Come on somebody
Why don't you run
Ol' Red's itchin' to have a little fun
Get my flashlight
Get my pack
Red'll have you treed before the mornin' comes
Now Ol' Red got real used to seeing
His lady every night
And so she kept far away for three or four days
And waited till the time got right
Well I made my run with the evenin' sun
And I smiled when I heard her in the well.
‘Cause I was headed straight for her with glee
And Kouga was headed south
And Kagome sang
Come on somebody
Why don't you run
Ol' Red's itchin' to have a little fun
Get my flashlight
Get my pack
Red'll have you treed before the mornin' comes
Now there’s black-haired hanyous all in Japan
Kikyo killed me and Kagome saved me
When he was through, Kagome’s mother nodded. "I think she’ll love it."
Kagome moved out from where she had been hiding. "Inu-Yasha, that was so sweet! What are you doing here? How’d
you figure out the CD player?"
Inu-Yasha started to blush. "Oh, drat," her mother said. "He was doing so well, too. I showed him how to use the
player, dear. Would you like a cookie?"
"Mm! Cookies!" Kagome dived into the food while her mother winked at Inu-Yasha. He nodded to her in thanks.
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