I plopped down in my easy chair and turned on Channel 2
A bad gunslinger called Salty Sam was chasing poor Sweet Sue
He trapped her in the old sawmill and said with an evil laugh:
If you don't give me the deed to your ranch, I'll saw you all in half!
And then he grabbed her
(And then?)
He tied her up
(And then?)
He turned on the bandsaw
(And then? And then...)
(Chorus:)
And then along came Jones, tall thin Jones,
|: slow-walking Jones :|
Along came long, lean, lanky Jones.
Commercial came on, so I got up to get myself a snack
You should've seen what was going on by the time that I got back
Down in the old abandoned mine, Sweet Sue was having fits -- that villain said:
Give me the deed to your ranch, or I'll blow you all to bits!
And then he grabbed her
(And then?)
He tied her up
(And then?)
He lit the fuse to the dynamite
(And then? And then...)
Chorus
I got so bugged I turned it off and turned on another show
But there was the same old shoot-'em-up and the same old rodeo
Salty Sam was trying to stuff Sweet Sue in a burlap sack -- he said:
If you don't give me the deed to your ranch, I'm gonna throw you on the railroad tracks!
And then he grabbed her
(And then?)
He tied her up
(And then?)
He threw her on the railroad tracks
(And then?)
A train started coming
(And then? And then...)
Chorus