Even before the hall is booked, flowers purchased and so on your mind will be thinking about those people who are supposed be standing next to you on this most important day. The wedding party is that all important group of people who best represent the nearest and dearest to your heart or so they say. Although this decision should be left entirely up to you and you fianc� more often than not people will have an opinion to share about who they think should be in your wedding party.
Family will pressure you to put your second cousin into the line up because they are �family� even though you have only seen this person twice in your life. Other times friends may start vying/claiming roles without even consulting you, assuming they know their place in your life better than you do. This can also lead to infighting which only makes your decision more difficult. Personally, my advice is to put your foot down and hold firm that only you and your fianc� will make this decision. But I know that sometimes you have to give on some things in order to keep the peace. Only make concessions you can live with, do what you feel is right.
The thing to keep in mind when choosing wedding party members is each person�s character. Sure you love your old roomie from college, you had great times stumbling back from bars and going on spring break trips, but is this fun loving jokester really a person you can lean on and trust to help when things get stressful? Probably not.
These people are your friends and family think about who they are to you.
Another thing that may help is making a list of all the duties each member would be responsible for taking on. Believe it or not most people don�t really know what a wedding party does other than wearing matching clothes and smiling for pictures. Making a list of duties is a way to not only help you choose the right person(s) for the job but it will also help your friends/family know what is expected of them should they choose to accept.
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