and Entertainment Complex
Sheeps
MEMORIAL PISSING PLAQUE official nominees...
I cannot ignore a challenge...BABZEE!
INSTRUCTIONS:
Now, imagine all the energy Russellmaniacs are devoting to determining exactly where said pissing took place. Imagine said Russellmaniacs building a shrine, and making yearly pilgrimages to the Memorial Pissing Plaque.
Got the visual? Such things as cherubs, yellow water in the fountain, etc, have been mentioned, and it was suggested we need a formal forum for nominations for the design of the memorial. Describe your design below.
NOTE: This is not my idea. NOT MY idea. Just want to clarify that...
ADENDUM TO NOTE: TO fully appreciate this thread, read thread by NOVA entitled " I'm just wondering, WHERE IS DA MAN? "
POSTSCRIPT TO ADENDUM TO NOTE: Lest any Perch visitor is offended, I for one do not believe this story. Not that I don't believe our boy never did this in a public place; as has been mentioned most men have, it is a male rite of passage. And I need to emphasize to our American Perchettes that it is a disgusting activity, but is not frowned upon in other countries to the extent it is here at home. So Russell may not realize .....AHEM! Just NOMINATE A DESIGN, dammit.
All of you have by now read Ted C's latest trash re Russell pissing off a fire escape at an Austin nightclub. If not, you know where to find it.
Sheeps
MEMORIAL PISSING PLAQUE official nominees...
I'll go first . . .
I propose a big sink. With plastic flowers in it.
( To truly appreciate this, refer to Nova's Where is Da Man thread. )
Babzee
MEMORIAL PISSING PLAQUE official nominees...
�
Sheesh, Sheeps!
OK. . .I already made my suggestion . . . somewhere ...
Did you get enough disclaimers on that or what?
I propose a "Splash" shaped plaque - bronze, perhaps - with a fountain of yellow water bubbling up from the center. Kind of like an eternal flame but wet, ya know?
And I think it should be surrounded with a massive planting of Sweet Peas!
Torri sez
MEMORIAL PISSING PLAQUE official nominees...
A brass plated urinal complete with a circulating pump. Rather than urine or yellow colored water, I think that locally brewed beer (SteinBock? ) he took to should be used...maybe we could even get the brewery to finance the site.
Of course it will also require those velvet rope thing-ys that you see at move premieres...maybe even a U.S. Park Ranger too, at least on the anniversary of the infamous event when we all make our pilgrimage to the sacred site.
And if it really takes on, we can build an auditorium and show a film....just like they do in Hawaii before you go to the Arizona Memorial. Then comes the giftshop...where we can purchase vials of the "annointed" earth.
That should just about do it...
Babzee
MEMORIAL PISSING PLAQUE official nominees...
ROFL--great suggestions, Torri!
But you forgot the Sweet Peas - gotta have them around a pissing plaque!
Maybe the gift shop could sell little suncatcher thingies with the actual sweet peas pressed between pieces of glass! Whatta souvenir, eh? Fertilized by Himself!
Torri sez
But in Austin . . .
...wouldn't yellow roses or Texas Bluebonnets be more appropriate...or am I missing something critical?
Sweet peas = sweet pees?
Sheeps
MEMORIAL PISSING PLAQUE official nominees...
ROTFLMAO! ! "Fertilized by HIMSELF! "
Torri - love your business sense, gal! I propose that instead of a film, on the exact anniversary of the event we have a special TOFOG appearance.
Uh...how we gonna explain this to Russell?
CGee
Ding Dong The Funk is Gone! ! !
In my opinion this and "Da man" thread is the most fun we've had post M.R.! Let's keep it going!
No memorial would be complete without some form of flannel. Perhaps souvenir flannel toilet paper?
Babzee
But in Austin....
Sweet peas = sweet pees
LOL - since we're memorializing it, it must have been one SWEET pee ...
You got it, Torri!
Torri sez
MEMORIAL PISSING PLAQUE official nominees...
Well yes, an annual concert would be appropriate. But a "filmed recreation" (like they do for those infotainment programs) could be used the remaining 364 days of the year.
We could also sell postcards...I suggest the kind that "move" when you look at it from different angles (the proper name escapes me) : Zipped, unzipped...zipped, unzipped,
Do you think they'll catch on?
Don't you just get the feeling that Ted Casablanca will be first in line (having camped out on the sidewalk for weeks) to visit the memorial?
Babzee
MEMORIAL PISSING PLAQUE official nominees...
Well, upon further consideration, maybe the whole Memorial Pissing Complex ought to include several public toilets too. So that no one can defile the sacred ground, so to speak. Re the sink proposal, perhaps we could substitute dishes for flowers? LOL - in line with the line from Steel Magnolias, "he's such a gentleman he'd take the dishes out of the sink before he peed in it."
Babzee
MEMORIAL PISSING PLAQUE official nominees...
OMG, Torri!
I love the postcard idea ( is the elusive word "holographic" ? ).
And maybe we could issue a special invitation to Teddy C to come to Austin an help "christen" the Memorial Complex!
Oh - and maybe the giftshop could also sell Thighmasters!
Along with the flannel toilet paper ( OMG! )
Do you think it would be entirely toooo tacky to also sell the Sordid Love World Tour t-shirts there too?
Torri sez
Memorial Pissing COMPLEX!
Now you're talking...
I think we could also sell little Russell on the fire escape snow-globes (yellow water would just NOT be a good thing).
Then there's the ALL WATERBED hotel/convention center right next door...
I also demand a royalty on the "I slept with Russell Crowe and all I got was this lousy T-shirt" consession.
Anon
Torri Sez- -
I get the t-shirt connession for
"I slept with Russell Crowe and THANK GOD all I got was this lousy t-shirt"
No, I've never slept with russell crowe.
Sheeps
Torri sez
Yes, and we'll have the attached cafe' to the complex....with such delectables as Pea Soup and Moo Cow Mocha Pie and Cabbage Head Rolls...and lots of Shiner!
Babzee
MEMORIAL PISSING PLAQUE official nominees...
SheepZee -
Check under the Where is THE MAN thread for a discussion Torri and I were having re tomatoes and possible tomato products to sell in the Gift Shoppe ...
Torri sez
The attached restaurant...
Lasagne, ladies, lasagne.
Babzee
The attached restaurant...
Baked Mystery Alaska!
Insider Sushi?
Breaking Up Pasta?
Thirty Odd Foot of Spuds? (gotta say it aloud to make it sound almost right)
Torri sez
The attached restaurant...
...only if there are carrots in the pasta
Babzee
The attached restaurant...
You would put carrots in pasta? ? ?
And what happened to the good wine?
BTW - the restaurant could be decorated with lots of large photos of fruits and veggies. And the wait staff could wear light meters on strings around their necks!
Torri sez
The attached restaurant...
...funky eyewear is also part of the attire.
I'm done in. Nighty-night!
Leeee
Well, girls...
....this is a little more like the old days!
Babzee
Nite Nite, Torri
It's been fun! We'll work out royalties later .....
Torri sez
Nite Nite Torri
I'm back with one more idea...
If we can get Russell to donate his ciggie butts, we can encase them in clear resin and sell them in the gift shop as paperweights. And just to appeal to RC's sense of irony, we can donate the proceeds from their sale to the American (and Australian) Lung Association.
Now I really must get to bed...toodles.
Babzee
Paperweights
Yet another brilliant idea, Torri!
Oh - maybe we could get him to donate his beer bottle tops too! We could get those encased in clear (or even beer-colored) resin too and sell them. Shall we contribute those proceeds to the Salvation Army?
PuppyDawg
We've forgotten...
...tomatos - same as lemon trees, Mate. The restaurant could use the tomatos for the lasagna. Lemon trees could be planted to sweeten the air ( 'cause it would sure need to be sweetened).
I like this thread.
Krissy
We've forgotten....
I'm with ya on just about everything, especially the flannel toilet paper (ROFL! )... but, back to the cherub type statue...
Somewhere in Europe (Belgium, or Germany maybe? ? ? ) there is a statue of a little boy pissing, bc he wandered off, got lost, and when he was found, he happened to be takiing a leak. My hubby's got pics of it and a keychain. It's called the Mennekin Piss ( sp? ). Now, I propose a lifesize statue of Russ, and we can call it the "Russell Can Piss (wherever he wants to) " memorial... we'll leave off the flowing water/beer, in the interest of taste. Wouldn't want our entertainment complex to be tacky, by any means!
Torri sez
Paperweights
Actually I think the beer caps will make excellent refrigerator magnets...or adornments for a key ring.
What other typical gift shop knick-knacks can we come up with? Genuine Jocelynd cow-pie doorstops or for the big spender, a Russell on black velvet, nope make that Russell on black flannel painting.
...and of course the gift shop will have a TOFOG wing...
Krissy
Doorstops...
�
Well, the cowpie doorstops would have to come in 2 price ranges, bronzed (expensive) and au natural (cheaper).
how about a tattoo parlor as part of the TOFOG wing - people could get copies of Dean's G clef and barbwire tattoo
and, of course, we'd have to sell copies of the TOFOG personalized license plates, and the little "euro" stickers for the car - MPP in black letters on a white background - Memorial Pissing Plaza, to encompase the whole site.
(my personal disclaimer for all suggestions - I'm home sick today - headache, stomach ache, and slight fever - I can't be held responsible for ANYthing I post today )
minime
MEMORIAL PISSING PLAQUE official nominees...
� I don't believe anyone has suggested the virtual website tour! I believe we could be sponsored by all types of companies.....Shiner Bock, American Standard Urinals, and the guys who make urinal cakes (never having used a urinal, I have no idea who they are). But I think a virtual tour could really catch on.
Torri sez
MPP
Excellent suggestions, both!
The virtual tour could be hosted by Sid 6.7 too!
Minime, I haven't taken the time to let you know that I admire your "Barge". It also reminds me of a Viking ship and as any fan knows, da man is of Norwegian ancestry. Skol!
BTW - feel better soon Krissy. I recommend chicken soup and a good movie (wink, wink, nudge, nudge)
minime
Good mornin' Torri sez. I would love to see Sid 6.7 host the virtual tour. ( Is it too perverted to have him do it nude? Never did care for the green suit. Besides it is for public peeing afterall! )
Glad you like the barge..most of us on board agree that even if DeNile is landlocked, we will stay on board for the party! Come on and grab an oar! !
Torri sez
Minime, it would be wrong for Sid to NOT be in the nude.
Unfortunately duty calls...but I'll be back this evening! C-ya!
Krissy
Mmmmm, nude Sid - I'll have to take the tour, just to make sure that all is up to par, lol!
oh, and the urinal cakes - as any good Frasier watcher knows, urinal cakes are made by his ex-sis-in-law Maris' family!
I'll be having the chicken soup (and movie)for lunch Torri! Thanks!
Debm1
I've printed out this whole thread and I'm going to read it. Gotta catch up on this one. This one really looks like it is heading for the sluices.
Krissy-get to bed, eat your soup and check your e-mail.
Krissy
C'mon ladies. put your (slightly off-kilter) thinking caps on and come up with more suggestions for this wonderful fans-of-Russ destination!
Debm1
Do any of you who were in Austin on the 18th remember that RC used the word "piss" in a totally different way.
Remember when the Hollywood types were acting up and RC told us that he had given them "free piss and food" and look how they acted. Maybe you guys can run with that.
Krissy: read your e-mail or I'll send SID after you. I just got him in the mail yesterday.....Footy Perv
Krissy
Yes deb, piss is drink. As Jeff would say, piss is also wee,
I got one e-mail from you and I think I replied, and then I got a second, but it was blank... SID? ? ?
minime
�
So you saying our memorial should be a drinking fountain after all....Kind of changes the shape of things....
Krissy
�
Ewwww! no! ! ! yuck! ! !
We'll stick with the non-drinking fountain, please!
I just thought of some more food/restaurant suggestions - mashed potatoes and "peas" must be served with the lasagne; the napkins will look like striped dishtowels, and should be worn around the neck; you MUST push you plate away when finished dining, or the waitstaff with the light meters will not clear your table; and, in addition to light meters, they should also have lens caps and/or magnifying glasses hanging around their necks.
Now, the hosts/hostesses who seat patrons should wear something different to distinguish them - how about PJ bottoms with little horsies on them?
minime
�
How about just the blue bath towel...Of Course if we are discussing hostesses, maybe they should wear the tops of the horsie PJ's.
sorry about the drinking fountain theme. I know you are not feeling well today. Hope I didn't make it worse hehehe!
Viking Barge...
Ladies and Ted, your host for the tour Sid 6.7...
Ladies and Ted, your host for the tour Sid 6.7...
Is Jeff your Plumber?
MPP suggestions
Subject of the day!
Subject of the day!
Piss or Wee...
Piss or Wee...
Horsie PJ's
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