You don't have to tell me you love me. You don't have to whisper "forever". (At least not yet.)
Right now the little things count more. Lately, those haven't been available either. You call
when you feel like calling, you take me out when nothing else is going on, you
cut our conversations short when there's a game to be played.
You leave in the middle of the night, mumbling something about work in the morning.
And I'm afraid to tell you what I really want- afraid that you're not ready to hear it and if I were to just wait
a little longer, you'll get your head figured out, you'll focus on me and you'll see what a great match
we really are.
But I don't know how long I can wait for you to cross over. I have needs,
wants, desires. And you cannot fullfill them all
in the state you're currently in.
I'm trying to be patient and give you time and space, and I focus
on the times when you do get it right. When you open the car door for me, or you smile an endearing smile
and rub your hand across my knee. Or you call at 11:00 just because. Or you tell me, "let's just lay here and snuggle
for a bit." after great sex. It's these times that I hope to have more of. It's these I cling to when
I feel like throwing in the towel.
Nothing is ever perfect. The wise woman knows when to hold on tighter and
when it's time to let go. I'm still learning.
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