I was missing you right now. Oh how it hurts to know you
are gone. What can I say? I listen to the music and reread
the memorial that I wrote for you..and I get all choked up.
Little Angels it's called. You truly were an angel, in human
form. And now I suppose, God has given you your wings.
I
often wonder if you think of me, up there... if you are here
watching over me... sometimes I feel your presence.
Sometimes I just feel empty. Shouldnt I be happy that you
have found the peace that eluded you on earth? I guess
maybe I'm just selfish. I want you here.
I miss our talks...
sometimes I wonder what if. What if I had still been online
when you were thinking about suicide. Could I have helped
you? I just can't imagine never seeing your name light up
when I log into chat. I can't imagine not "hearing" you call
me foxxy. I can't imagine my heart without you. Something
about this eats at me night and day. I see so much of your
soul through your eyes. You were above this. and yet, you
were human. I wish just once that I would feel your spirit
comfort me. As i sit here, just a soft touch of your hand on
my shoulder, to tell me that you are alright, and that you
will always watch over me, and that you have found your
peace. Hotshot, I miss you so much.
<-- archives -->