The Dalai Lama - Tenzin Gyatso

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"It is natural for the immature to harm others. Getting angry with them is like resenting a fire for burning." Shantideva
A BAG OF NAILS... Once upon a time there was a little boy with a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he should hammer a nail in the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. But, gradually, the number of daily nails dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence. Finally the first day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He proudly told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days

passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. "You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out, it won't matter how many times you say 'I'm sorry,' the wound is still there."
"If there are sound reasons or bases for the points you demand, then there is no need to use violence. On the other hand, when there is no sound reason that concessions should be made to you but mainly your own desire, then reason cannot work and you have to rely on force. Thus, using force is not a sign of strength but rather a sign of weakness. Even in daily human contact, if we talk seriously, using reasons, there is no need to feel anger. We can argue the points. When we fail to prove with reason, then anger comes. When reason ends, then anger begins. Therefore, anger is a sign of weakness." The Dalai Lama

HEALING HATRED By His Holiness the Dalai Lama... The destructive effects of hatred are very visible, very obvious and immediate. For example, when a strong or forceful thought of hatred arises, at that very instant it overwhelms one totally and destroys one's peace and presence of mind. When that hateful thought is harboured inside, it makes one feel tense and uptight, and can cause loss of appetite, leading to loss of sleep, and so forth.
If we examine how anger or hateful thoughts arise in us, we will find that, generally speaking, they arise when we feel hurt, when we feel that we have been unfairly treated by someone against our expectations. If in that instant we examine carefully the way anger arises, there is a sense that it comes as a protector, comes as a friend that would help our battle or in taking revenge against the person who has inflicted harm on us. So the anger or hateful thought that arises appears to come as a shield or a protector. But in reality that is an illusion. It is a very delusory state of mind.
Chandrakirti states in Entry into the Middle Way that there might be some justification for responding to force with force if revenge would help one in any way, or prevent or reduce the harm which has already been inflicted. But that is not the case because if the harm, the physics. injury or whatever, has been inflicted, it has already taken place. So taking revenge will not in any way reduce or prevent that harm or injury because it has already happened. On the contrary, if one reacts to a situation in a negative way instead of in a tolerant way, not only is there no immediate benefit, but also a negative attitude and feeling is created which is the seed of one's future downfall. From the Buddhist point of view, the consequence of taking revenge has to be faced by the individual alone in his or he future life. So not only is there no immediate benefit, it is harmful in the long run for the individual. However, if one has been treated very unfairly and if the situation is left unaddressed, it may have extremely negative consequences for the perpetrator of the crime. Such a situation calls for a strong counteraction. Under such circumstances, it is possible that one can, out of compassion for the perpetrator of the crime and without generating anger or hatred, actually take a strong stand and take strong countermeasures. In fact, one of the precepts of the Bodhisattva vows is to take strong countermeasures when the situation calls for it. If a Bodhisattva doesn't take strong countermeasures when the situation requires, then that constitutes an infraction of one of the vows. In addition, as the Entry into the Middle Way points out, not only does the generation of hateful thoughts lead to undesirable forms of existence in future lives, but also, at the moment that strong feelings of anger arise, no matter how hard one tries to adopt a dignified pose, one's face looks rather ugly. There is an unpleasant expression, and the vibration that the person sends is very hostile. People can sense it, and it is almost as if one can feel steam coming out of that person's body. Indeed not only are human beings capable of sensing it, but pets and other animals also try to avoid that person at that instant. If we examine how anger or hateful thoughts arise in us, we will find that, generally speaking, they arise when we feel hurt, when we feel that we have been unfairly treated by someone against our expectations. These are the immediate consequences of hatred. It brings about a very ugly, unpleasant physical transformation of the individual. In addition, when such intense anger and hatred arise, it makes the best part of our brain, which is the ability to judge between right and wrong and assess long-term and short-term consequences, become totally inoperable. It can no longer function. It is almost as if the person had become crazy. These are the negative effects of generating anger and hatred. When we think about these negative and destructive effects of anger and hatred, we realise that it is necessary to distance ourselves from such emotional explosions. Insofar as the destructive effects of anger and hateful thoughts are concerned, one cannot get protection from wealth; even if one is a millionaire, one is subject to these destructive effects of anger and hatred. Nor can education guarantee that one will be protected from these effects. Similarly, the law cannot guarantee protection. Even nuclear weapons, no matter how sophisticated the defence system may be, cannot give one protection or defend one from these effects. The only factor that can give refuge or protection from the destructive effects of anger and hatred is the practice of tolerance and patience.

Last Update - March 5, 2005

motivated to be ordained on the basis of some sort of superficial "fashionable" renunciation, there is no need to become a monk or nun. Rather, it would be better to study the teachings for a few years to gain a real understanding that one needs to practice these three higher trainings, the importance of training in morality and, finally, that the most excellent way of practicing morality is to be ordained. The Buddha himself was an ordained person, as well as Nagarjuna, Asanga and all the Great Ornaments of India and many other greatly realized beings. It is true that subsequently there were some lay masters and tantric practitioners, but they were greatly realized beings and they were lay persons for very good reasons. But generally, in such places as Thailand, Burma, and Sri Lanka, the foundation of the Buddhist teachings is the vinaya and the celibate life. So being ordained is very good. I rejoice.
On Keeping One's Ordination... Having taken ordination, it is important to remain a monk. Of course there are difficulties, but there are also benefits and merits. The longer you stay a monk and remain celibate, the more independence and freedom you have to spend more time on spiritual things. With a family you have to spend a lot of time, and it creates a lot of unnecessary problems and worries. So there are difficulties of course. Sometimes you meet an attractive woman and find it a little bit uncomfortable. (Laughs) If you remain with her, of course there is some pleasure for a short while, then as time goes by, comes misery, fighting and more worries, and with children even more trouble. Perhaps there is more freedom, I think, having a girlfriend without being married. (Laughs) A few moments here, a few moments there, then eventually you may get AIDS. Then instead of meditating on anicca (impermanence), real anicca comes. (Laughter) So then of course, mindfulness of the body is very useful. You look at a beautiful, attractive companion, but of course, there is just the same bones, same flesh, same blood, as any other body. You should think about and visualize the substances inside the body. Many years ago, in Bangkok I saw in the entrance of the main hall of a monastery, some pictures of a dead body � one day old, two days old, three, four days, like that. So first the fresh dead body, then blue, swelling. That is what the Buddha himself is always talking about. So that's very important. You have to familiarize yourself with that, again and again. Intellectually you understand, "Yes, the body is ugly, made of substances which are very dirty." Intellectually you understand, but emotionally still you feel, "Oh, this is very beautiful, very smooth, very good color, very beautiful shape and good smell." Good smells are usually artificial smells, not coming from the body, but from perfume! (Laughter) But still, emotionally you go in that direction. Intellectually you understand this is dirty, this is bad, but still emotionally you go in a different way. So you have to familiarize yourself, and once you really feel fully convinced, then the emotion gradually changes. Then at a little higher level you find out the very nature of delusions, the afflictive emotions: anger, attachment, jealousy, discontent. One must be convinced that the negative emotions are very harmful, being destructive not only in this life, but in all lives; not only for myself, but for all society, the whole world, all sentient beings. Negative emotions are so harmful, so destructive. Once we have developed some sort of full conviction, one gets some distance from negative emotions. I think the Buddhadharma, the Buddha's way of shaping our mind, using not just one method, but hundreds of different methods is so helpful. So we need to study the various methods so that we can use them to eventually shape our minds. So just praying to Buddha is good, but not sufficient. In that respect, to study the works of the great Indian masters such as Nagarjuna, Aryasanga and Dignaga, Dharmakirti, is very useful because their works really give more detailed, profound explanations about our negative mind and how to change it.

Advice from His Holiness the Dalai Lama (Extracted from an interview Venerable Tenzin Josh had with His Holiness The Dalai Lama during the Pre-Ordination Course in Dharamsala on February 24, 1999)
Advice to the Ordination Candidates... In general, the practice of the Buddhist teachings is founded upon the "going forth" from the lay life and into the ordained life, the celibate life. However, wanting to take up the ordained, celibate life must be based on a realistic, genuine faith in the Buddha's teachings on the three higher trainings: morality, concentration and wisdom; and particularly, that the best way to practice morality is to be ordained. If one is

Tibetan Sayings... (A Precious Treasury of Elegant Sayings)
Experience can be a most beautiful adornment.
Hurtful expressions may carefully be avoided.
Meditation without Knowledge will in the end be without true success.
Men of little ability may prosper by depending on the great.
Much talking can be a source of danger.
Only narrow-minded men make such distinctions as "enemies" and "friends." It is uncertain who may yet be of aid to one.
The greatest happiness consists in having tranquillity of mind.
The quiescence of a holy man is the sign of his being a sage.
The talkative parrot is shut up in a cage. Other birds, who cannot speak, fly about freely.
To know thoroughly one's own virtues or powers are the characteristics of an excellent man.
When about to perform any great work, endeavour to have a trustworthy associate.
From The Ocean of Delight for the Wise...
Dhyana [contemplation] is a clarifier of a beclouded mind.
Don't consult the one who is habituated and hardened to evil doings.

Gloat not, even though death and misfortune overwhelm your enemies.
Gold is acceptable even from one who is inimical.
He who fails to practice worthy precepts after learning them, could be like someone who lights a lamp and then shuts his eyes.
He who is ever looking for faults in those who are learned and righteous, has the nature of a crow.
Narrowmindedness merely serves praise.
Preaching religious truths to an unbeliever is like feeding a venemous serpent with milk.
Relinquish an evil custom even if it is of your fathers and ancestors; adopt a good custom even though it is established among your enemies.
The selfish don't know enough of what leads to altruism.
Who can say with certainty that he will live to see the morrow?
From The Staff of Wisdom... Companionship with the wise and gentle, even in prison, can work better than sovereignty with the unruly.
The science that teaches arts and handicrafts is for gaining a living - The science that teaches deliverance from worldly existence, is not that the true science?
Time is fleeting and learning is vast, so use the swan's art of extracting milk from water and devote yourself to the Most Precious Path.
To him who knows the True Nature of things, what need is there of a teacher?

Causes of Regret... HAVING received a pure and well endowed human body, try and use it for the best. It would be a cause of regret to spend it wholly in worldly aims and pursuits.
To spend the prime of youth mostly in vulgar amusements, can be a later source of much regret.
To abandon kindly parents can turn into a source of regret.
Some Things to Be Avoided... It is generally well to avoid a guru set on acquiring possessions.
Avoid friends who are detrimental to your peace of mind.
Avoid gaining your livelihood by means of deceit and theft.
Avoid acts of levity and thoughtlessness as lower you in another's esteem.
Avoid useless conduct and actions.
Avoid such food and habits as disagree with your health.
It could be well to avoid and eliminate what is most likely inspired by greed
Some Things not to Be Avoided... Good passions, rightly used, are not to be avoided: Taste life to the full, rather.
That which comes of itself as a good gift, is not to be avoided.
Reason, a best friend, is not to be avoided.
Helping one's body and mind to carry on and flourish, is not to be avoided..
Things To Know... The mind is quite impermanent.
Ideas very often arise from a concatenation [a linking together in a series or chain] of causes..
Some sorrow is rather inevitable in a lifetime. (Life works as a guru.)
Misfortune is also a guru.
Attachment to worldly things easily makes prosperity inimical to spiritual progress.
All things are quite interdependent.

What to Persevere In... A beginner should both listen to and meditate on salvaging expert teachings.
Striving to dominate great drowsiness may prolong it. Remain sensible with yourself, at any rate.
Should various misfortunes assail you, expressing pity is not enough].
Should there be great mental attachment, contemplate so as to advance in spite of that.
Hurry toward perfection.
Incentives... Get a free career so as not to be dominated.
Be incited to live piously.
Reflecting on the results of evil, avoid evil.
Win Enlightenment of mind yourself.
Seek the antidotes of evil and bad propensities before the latter win.
Aimlessly frittering away one's life is no small incentive to diligence too.
It helps to be incited to diligence - in any neat way you can .
Mount not evil.
Errors... A weak intellect is apt to lead to narrow-minded dogmatism.
Without adequate religious instruction, great zeal makes some go to erroneous extremes and

follow misleading teachings.
Lack of adequate preparation may easily cause much time misspent in the "basement" of unconsciousness, instead of "moving upwards and upstairs" furtively]
Much and sound knowledge can divert some into worldly thinking: Guard against it.
Worldly ambitions bring about that one allows oneself to be dominated by worldly motives.
A vulgar mind may be puffed up with worldly pride.
Exhibiting skills in worldly rites through pride is no small error.
Decadence is always wrong.
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