He was hesistant at first but once he saw me stare at his lips while licking my own he knew I was willing. My eyes closed as he kissed me softer and more gently than I have ever been kissed in my life. My own sigh came as a surprise to me as the kiss deepened. The phone rings and is ignored as I lay back, he moves forward and suddenly he was on top of me on the couch. He shifts and his hand begins to rub me. The feeling of silk between his hand and my body was amazing and my hips began to move with his hand. He stands up and pulls me up with him and he leads me to the bed. Here I am, flat on my back with Nick on top of me and his tongue is in my mouth. I can't believe this as we roll over and his hands cover my butt, even through his boxers and my underwear I can tell he is ready for more as I begin to grind into him. His high pitched moans are intoxicating and I break the kiss and my head drops onto the bed. He turns his head and whispers in my ear,
"What? What's wrong?" He rolls us over and I look up at him,
"It's been a long time Nick." He nods and places light kisses on my neck,
"I know, it's ok baby. What do you want to do? You can tell me." I know he can see the pained look on my face, the look of fear,
"Hey, what happens between us stays between us. I won't tell anyone." The phone rings again and we both sigh,
"You better get that, it could be important." He shakes his head,
"They'll hang up." I nod,
"Or they'll keep calling." He looks at me and nods in defeat as he gets up and answers his cell phone. I take the opportunity to pull myself together and stand up to go to the bathroom. He grabs my hand and I point to the bathroom. Once inside I take a deep breath and look at myself in the mirror as I turn on the water. I can't believe this, how many times am I going to say that? I should believe it because it's definitely happening. A few splashes of cold water over my face doesn't really help but I take another deep breath and head out,
"-because you can't pull a black girl doesn't mean I can't. I told you man, everyone loves me...yeah, I'll tell you all about it." My stomach drops as I look at Nick's back and head back inside the bathroom. I feel stupid, how stupid can you be Quinn. I shake my head as I think back to what one of the girls said at the club,
"Probably just testing, seeing what it's like." I walk out the bathroom to see him sitting on the bed waiting for me with a smile. I don't bother to say anything I just walk over, pick up my boots, the dollar off the coffee table and head for the door,
"Where are you going?" I just walk out, leaving him there asking questions. Standing in front of the vending machine I look over and see him coming down the hall with a pair of pants on. I'm banging the vending machine when he comes over,
"Sometimes you just have to hold it a little longer." He reaches past me, just like a man to try and step in and fix the problem, and pulls the handle,
"Here you go." He offers the candy to me,
"Why did you do that?" He frowns,
"This isn't what you wanted?" I place my hands on my hips,
"No it's not. Do I LOOK like I eat Almond Joy bars?" He sighs and whispers as his eyes dart around to make sure no one was present,
"What is your problem?" I roll my eyes and cross my arms,
"You're my problem!" He looks so utterly confused standing there with no shoes on, his hair all over the place. Hard to believe he looks like a little kid standing before me now but five minutes ago he looked like the man who was going to make me feel like I've never felt before,
"What? What did I do?" His eyes searching mine pleadingly,
"I'm not trying to be your black experience ok." I turn and run into Eric who pulls me into his arms,
"Are you ok?" I wipe the tears from my eyes, unsure of when I started crying,
"Can I sleep in your room?" He whispers in my ear,
"Sure." I walk down the hall, not bothering to say another word to Nick. Walking back to Eric's room I can't help but beat myself up for being stupid. Why did I think for even a moment that he was being sincere?
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Mixed Feelings
Chapter 64