Over the past two weeks since Atlanta and Nick and I haven't talked. What is there to talk about? So many times I wanted to talk to him, I wanted to call but I chickened out. As time went on I got closer and closer, I started out dialing five digits of his phone number then hanging up. Yesterday I dialed nine numbers but hung up before I got to the tenth. This morning I got through all ten but hung up before it starting ringing. There were pictures on the internet of Marnie walking just behind Nick but you can tell they were together. It was a picture of them, along with the rest of the group, going to the club in Atlanta. There had been all kinds of speculation about who she was and if she was Nick's new girlfriend. I never understood how people thought everyone who was with Nick was his girlfriend. I mean I'm sure most of these girls are old enough to know you're not someone's girlfriend if you hang out or even sleep with them. I'm sure Marnie is loving every moment of this.
I read a fan's review of the Denver show and the girl said Nick was with a blonde with big boobs. Another girl had pictures but they hadn't come back yet but she was sure it was the same girl he was with in Atlanta because she had seen those pictures. I pick up the phone and dial Chris,
"Hello?" I lean back in the chair,
"Hey Chris, what's up?" It's been a week since the last time we talked,
"Hey, what you been up to?" I sigh and look over at the computer,
"Nothing much. I miss you." She sighed,
"Aww, I miss you too. It's been so hectic." I frown slightly,
"What's wrong? Everything ok?"
"Yeah, it's cool just uh, work stuff." I could tell she was a little hesitant,
"So...how is your buddy?"
"Who?" I roll my eyes and shake my head,
"Marnie." If she was in Denver then Chris would know,
"Oh, she's great." Thanks Chris, make me take the plunge. I have a feeling Marnie doesn't have to ask what is going on with Nick and me Chris probably just tells her. I feel bad for thinking that about her,
"Has she talked to Nick?"
"Um yeah, actually she went to see him in Denver and..." I knew there was more when she stopped so abruptly and I knew exactly what she didn't want to tell me, what I didn't want to hear,
"So they..."
"Yeah, she slept with him. I'm sorry Quinn, I know you like him." I knew it just like I knew about a lot of the others. Hell, he told me about some of them. I don't know why this time it was like a punch in the gut, it's not like Marnie and I are friends,
"It's not like I'm surprised. Besides, he can do what he likes." Why am I so upset,
"It's no big deal Chris. You like Howie, do you get upset every time he's with a girl?" It wasn't the same and I know she's going to bust me on it,
"That's different Quinn and you know it. What I feel for Howie, which is just a crush, is not what you're starting to feel for Nick." Call waiting beeps and I look at the ID panel and see Eric's name,
"Hey Chris, I gotta take this. I'll talk to you later."
"Hello?"
"Hey girl, what's up?" I smile, Eric can always make me smile no matter how I'm feeling,
"Hey, what's up? Where are you?" I could hear a couple of people in the background,
"We're in Las Vegas." I smile,
"I've always wanted to go to Vegas. When's your show?"
"It's tomorrow night, you should come out?" I can hear someone scream out something and he answered by telling them it was me he was talking to,
"I can't...I have to work tomorrow." Tomorrow was Friday,
"Call in sick and then fly out." That sounds so tempting,
"You just have the one show?"
"No, we have one Friday and one Sunday night...it's the last show of the tour, then we have a few days off and head to Mexico City for two shows." I began to look on the internet for flights,
"Maybe I'll work half the day and fly out tomorrrow afternoon, like at three. My office isn't that far from the airport."
"Kevin's wife asked about you the other day." I smile and frown at the same time. It was cool that she asked about me but I begin to think about the comments 'the suits' and Leighanne made,
"What did she say?"
"Her, Leighanne, AJ's girlfriend and Howie's girlfriend, or whoever she is..date, friend, whatever, are all going to be in Vegas and AJ starting kidding Nick that he was the only one that wasn't going to have someone. Kristin said he should invite you." My heart starts to beat a little faster,
"What did he say?"
"He said he could find anyone to hang with in Vegas, then Kristin told him no one wanted to hang out with some random girl he picked up for the weekend." I smile, I like her more and more.
"She was kidding him...then he said you were busy." How the hell would he know anything about me, it's not like we talked,
"I'm not busy." He laughs,
"I didn't think so...so um, what happened? You guys have a fight?" I sigh,
"I don't know, it's kind of complicated."
"You like him huh?" I sigh and shake my head. What would he think of me if I admitted it? "What makes you think that?" He laughs lightly,
"Just a feeling. You're a pretty girl, he's a good looking guy. Late nights, little alcohol, I'm surprised nothing has happened." I didn't know what to say so I didn't say anything,
"DID something happen? Is that what... did you guys-"
"NO, absolutely not." We spent the rest of our time on the phone with him telling me about tour stories and me telling him about my frustrating days at work. I make him promise not to tell anyone, especially Nick, I was coming out that weekend.
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Mixed Feelings
Chapter 60