King Kong vs. Godzilla
(1962)
Starring:
Godzilla
King Kong
Giant Octopus
But to help get this new form of berry popular, the company needs themselves a mascot. Hey! The berry's native land, Farou Island, has a giant monkey god! Let's kidnap him and put him in commercials! He'll be the next Pepsi Girl (you remember her, the annoying one with Joe Pesci's voice. Yeah, I try to force those painful memories out of my head too)! So an expadition sets off in search of the big lug.
Meanwhile, an iceberg has been melting, causing multipal tidal waves in the vacinity. A submarine goes to investigate why, only to discover that Godzilla has recently freed himself from his icy tomb and, damnit, he's pissed! I would be too. Imagine being trapped inside an ice block for 10 years. I'd be eager to use my radioactive breath to set a forest on fire so I could get all nice and toasty.
While Godzilla does his thing in Japan, the team sent by the pharmacutical company finds giant ape god Kong wearing a giant octopus for a hat. After they convince him that octopi were so last year, they try to convince him on the perks of show business. Kong declines, saying that his uncle tried that in 1933, and it didn't quite pan out. He hooked up with the wrong women and finally offed himself on the Empire State Building. It was all over the news and quite embarassing for the family. Determined to not leave the island without a star, they drug Kong up with the berry juice, and build a giant raft in all of about 10 minutes to tow him in.
Since the Japanese government appearantly has more sense than the idiots who captured a 45 meter tall gorilla with the intent of bringing him to the mainland, they tell them nothin' doin'. Turn you damn ship around and take your giant spanking monkey with you. But before this happens, Kong wakes up and is not happy about being drugged asleep. The crew of the ship destroys Kong's raft, hoping to take Kong out with it, but only succeed in freeing him. Cofused as to where he is, Kong heads to Japan to find the nearest gas station so he can ask for directions back to Farou Island.
On his way, he bumps into Godzilla, and if there's one thing we've learned from 1933's King Kong, it's that giant lizards and giant monkeys are natural enemies (and that giant monkeys are turned on by petite blondes). Just seeing each other for the first time, they immediatly decide they don't like each other. Kong decides to lay the T-Rex smackdown on Godzilla, when Godzilla unleashes his flame breath upon him. Kong, dazed and confused, just wonders away wondering what the hell happened? The Rexes back home never did that.
Meanwhile, Japan puts up an electrical blockade in order to keep these damn monsters out of their yard. Godzilla just wonders around it, but Kong, ever so desperate to find that gas station, pummels right through it. Upon his night in the big city, he meets a hot asian chick and Kong, being a sucker for the ladies, takes her out on the town (by on the town, I of course mean on top of a building). But Japan doesn't want his kind around, so they drug him and take away his hopeful lay for the evening.
But this raises the question, is Japan big enough for two monsters? Subsequent Godzilla films would suggest yes, but this is a naive time for the country, back when they thought giant monsters were a rare thing. So they set up an air lift with giant balloons (beating their raft record by 2 seconds!) and take Kong to Mt. Fuji, where the clash of the titans takes place...
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