Dr Horvath's

Movie Reviews

Well well, where does one start with such a fine eye for detail, I'll go by the movies I have seen most recently but first I should explain the scale;

= 1 Horvathian

The following indicate what so many Horvathian's equal in viewing terms.

= Rip snorter, well worth a look see, if you don't like it I'll sell you the site.

= Nice one, give it a whirl.

= I thought twas good, but could have done with a bit of a sprucing up.

= Something in this movie was as silly as a cart wheel.

= I can't believe I paid money for that, I feel like I've been ripped a new one.

= What was that? No doubts here, I've been well and truly taken up the duff, not every day you get a movie this bad, this is definately not good, I would expect no-one has seen this movie.

Now that we understand the scale, it's time to get cracking, let us begin;

Matrix Revolutions

The ending?? tsk tsk..short review, I know. Well I'm not going to explain it to you, sheesh, that would ruin the whole point of a review, that's if you class this as a review, I see it as more of a waste of your time.

I give it

The Medallion

The problem with this is that I couldn't work out if this was comedy, action, drama, suspense, it didn't fit into any category, it had hot stuff Claire Felany a strapping young girl the love interest of Jackie Chan(don't get me wrong, he's a gun) 50 year old and that was just to yuck to see, let alone the acting, still scratching myself trying to work out how this movie made it to the cinemas, it should have been released on..not DVD, nor VHS, it shouldn't have been released straight to TV premiering on SBS along with those dodgy Japanese films at twit in the early hours of the morning.

This movie gets a

Bad Boys 2

Action packed, but full of jokes for lay men.  If your an intuitive type like myself, you'll be having a bit of a giggle at some of the pathetic story line or acting, I can't decide.

This movie gets

Lara Croft : Tomb Raider (Cradle of Life)

Whoa Nelly, if you're a hot blooded male and haven't seen this, I reckon you must like men in the odd way.  Good story I think, can't quite remember, I was WOWed by Miss Jolie, grrroww.

Agelina Jolie gets this movie ...a horvathian for her lower half, her lips, and two for her 'to die for' middle half if you know what I mean, hence the 4 Horvathians.

Terminator 3

What's the name of T1000's replacement in this, she's grroww as I take well to a good looking bird in a movie, the actual movie wasn't to bad if you follow along with the trilogy of films, there's a fair few good trilogy's out there, was this one of them? I guess so.

I give this

Pirates of the Caribbean (Curse of the Black Pearl)

Johnny Depp, what a character he is, in this movie anyway.  I'm currently looking to adopt his dress sense email me if you know where I can get me some pirate clothes and a parrot.  What about the story line you ask, yeah not to shabby.

I give this

Lord Of The Rings (Return Of The King)

Frodo and the lads are pure bliss, I look at this as more of a pre-review as I know that it will be good and you will see it regardless of what I write and once I've written what I write it will make no sense to come and read this which I've written if you have already seen the movie cause seriously, I mean seriously, what sought of larikan(most likely incorrectly spelt) reads a review and doesn't see a movie because of what some scoz breath has written, unless of course you get the true review (that which I write).

I will be giving this . Those scum bags in New Zealand got to see it at the time this was written, that being the 1st of December while we humans in Australia don't get to see it till Boxing Day which leads me to ask my next question, why do they call it Boxing Day? I'm classing that as a frequently asked question hence the hint to go to the FAQ's page and find out. 

No more reviews at this time I'm reserving myself for some comical movies that don't realise thats what they are, usually you'll find someone like Jennifer Lopez in this type of movie, who's hot bod won't save them from a negative review.  Don't like my reviews or want me to review a movie, email me at [email protected] or write in the guest book, that's if it works, who knows, not even I, the creater, you'll find out soon enough.