| Chapter 2 - The Black Oracle |
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| It has been a week since Viva La Resistance has been formed, and so far it had been a success. Numerous victories have been won by Viva La Resistance. They now control terroritory downtown, and it is now a constant hellzone there. Yet, more and more people are joining The Pasties now, because they supply their troops with supplies for their paint guns. Viva La Resistance only supplies the air for the guns. They have resorted to making their own paintballs, they now use real paint. The Walzack terroritory is starting to fall to Pasty control, Viva la Resistance has been pushed back all the way to the ballpark, The Pasties are attacking on all sides of Walzack. If Viva La Resistance loses the Walzack terroritory they will most likely lose the war because there will be nothing to stop The Pasties onto marching on Old Maides Viva La Resistance's stonghold. Moda thought all night about what to do and has come up with Operation: Kids Next Door. It consists of a plan to send Oreo Kanobi undercover and infiltrate the Pasties main base of operations for the Walzack siege. The next morning Oreo Kanobi was briefed on his mission. He accepted, but with the simple question "Why Me!?" Moda responded "Well, it is hard to explain, your becoming a strong black man, see your case has been very rare. Your are half white and half black, we did not know which way you would sway, and with your hate recently towards the black man, you awoken your "black panther" power. You will soon become a GangstaKnight, I cannot train you in this power, for I am a proud white man. Thats why before you proceed with your mission you must pay a visit with The Oracle..." "The Oracle from the Matrix!? She is real?" Oreo interupted. "No, not the Oracle from the matrix, his name is Negrodamus. He was once the greatest GangstaKnight in all the land, but his old age and constant weed smoking finally caught up with him. He has retired and now lives down in the bu." Moda says "You will visit this prophet and seek his guidance. You will return and complete Operation: Kids Next Door. Your ride is on its way, good luck and god speed." Oreo left the room and proceeded to his room. He had a hard time taking in all he was just told. He wished he could contact Commodore 64 to tell him he was becoming a black man. Yet, everyone knew Commodore 64 was blacker than him. Oreo heard his ride pull up and honk, he got up and left for Negrodamus. Oreo pulled up to Negrodamus's crib around 4:20. It was a rundown house on the outskirts of downtown. Oreo could hear in the distance the sound of paintball shots ringing out. He entered Negrodamus's house, suddenly out of no where. "HEY NIGGA WHAT IS UP, WANT SOME GREENS? OR HOW ABOUT SOME OF THIS FRESH FRIED CHICKEN WITH SOME BBQ SAUCE, I WILL EVEN THROW IN A SAMUEL ADAMS BEER!!!" Negrodamus yelled out. "Why are yelling Negrodamus? Hold on right quick though, I gotta call B-Rent and tell him a black person called me a nigger." Oreo said. "BECAUSE THIS IS THE WAY I TALK, IM SAMUEL ADAMS BITCH!! PEOPLE HAVEN'T CALLED ME NEGRODAMUS SINCE THE DAYS OF SLAVERY, BUT THAT NIGGER LOVING PRESIDENT LINCOLN LET US GO!! I LOVED MY JOB I HAD ACCESS TO THE BIGGEST WEED STASH IN THE WORLD. THIS SHIT WAS DA BOMB NIGGA, BUT THAT BITCH TYRONE BIGGUMS HAD TO TAKE IT ALL, WHAT THE HELL DOES A CRACK LOVING NIGGER DO WITH WEED, BUT THAT BITCH KNOWS HOW TO PARTY, HE HAD A CRACK PILE THIS HIGH(Negrodamus raises his hand to show the hieght of the crack pile which was up to his chest), WE ALL SUFFERED HEART ATTACKS." Negrodamus yelled. "I dunno, I am here for training, my white master Moda.." Negrodamus yelled "A BLACK MAN HAVING A WHITE MASTER, THATS JUST SOME BULLSHIT, BUT YES I DO SENSE THE GREAT POWER OF THE BLACK PERSON IN YOU. YOU NEED A SHIT LOAD OF TRAINING MY ONCE HALF WHITE FRIEND. YOU HAVE NO CLUE ON HOW TO LIVE LIKE A TRUE BLACK PERSON. YOU MUST WALK LIKE A BLACK MAN, TALK LIKE A BLACK MAN, AND ACT LIKE A BLACK MAN. IT IS NOT AN EASY TASK, BUT THROUGH MUCH WEED SMOKING YOU WILL GET THROUGH IT." "Sorry but I pass on the grass, crack is.." *SLAP* Oreo got slapped by Negrodamus. "DONT YOU EVER TALK ABOUT DRUGS LIKE THAT FOO! YOU BEST NOT KNOW HOW TO HAVE A GOOD TIME!!" Negrodamus yelled. The rest of the week Oreo trained hard on the ways of the black man. He learned Weedology, Black Language Arts, Black History, Black Music, Black Home Ec, Certain White Hate, and AP Poportions. It was now friday, and Oreo Kanobi has completed his training. He could now talk black, walk black, and act black. He was no officialy black, to a certain extent. Oreo was all ready to leave, he went to say goodbye to Negrodamus. He walked into his room and said his farewell, they did their "black" handshake and when Oreo was about to leave Negrodamus yelled to him to stop, Oreo stopped turned around, Negrodamus told him to look under the matress. Oreo walked over and lifted up the matress. Under it was an Ak-47 paintball gun and a nice silver polished glock paintball handgun. "THEY WERE YOUR FATHER'S NIGGA, HE WANTED ME TO GIVE THEM TO YOU, BUT I WAS AFRAID YOU WERE TO WHITE TO KNOW HOW THEY WORK. YES I KNEW YOUR DAD, THAT NIGGA WAS THE BEST GANGSTAKNIGHT IN THE WORLD. I WILL NEVER FORGET THE BITCH HE DIED OVER FOR. HER NAME WAS LATISHA, FINEST BITCH IN THE WORLD, BUT SHE HAD A WHITE BOYFRIEND, AND WHEN THE HONKEY FOUND OUT HE FLED WITH HER AND YOUR FATHER FOLLOWED AFTER THEM, THE WHITE FOLK LEAD HIM RIGHT INTO A TRAP, HE WAS NEVER SEEN AGAIN. REPORTS HAVE IT HE IS DEAD, NO BODY HAS EVER BEEN FOUND. KEEP THOSE WEAPONS ON THE DIZZLE IZZLE FO SHIZZLE MY NIZZLE." "Fo shizzle nizzle, I will keep this shit close to by 24/7 nigga. Thanks for all your black help Negrodamus. I will be the best GangstaKnight ever. Peace out." Oreo said, and he parted for the stronghold. |