HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH MADE FUN O’ KYO! Now where in the FUCK were we bitches. I’m angry today. laugh out loud just joking. So let’s have a barfight, shall we?

So uuuuh a few rejecticles went to look for Sarah so here they be. Wandering through the woods, that is.

Miyavi: *singing* You really wanna tell me something, but you can’t... you make me want to be a man....
jo: Miyavi, quit singing Utada Hikaru... We’re on a mission here...
Kyo: Yes, please spare us...
Miyavi: SHUT UP WOMAN! GO MAKE MY DINNER!
jo: *COW TAZER*
Miyavi: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
jo: DON’T YOU EVER TALK TO MY HUSBAND THAT WAY!
Kyo: Uh, I’m not your...
jo: *COW TAZER!!!!!!!*
Kyo: OW FUCKER!
jo: DON’T YOU EVER TALK ABOUT MY HUSBAND THAT WAY!
Kyo: I *AM YOUR* HUSBAND!
jo: ..............
Miyavi: ...............
Mana: ................................................
Kyo: I mean - you know what I mean, not your husband, I’m just the one - I’m the one you think is your–
jo: HUSBAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *cling*
Miyavi: I’m surrounded by minotaurs....
Mana: *nod*
Miyavi: How are we ever gonna find anything with that tard leading the way...?
Mana: *shrug*
jo: I’ll tell you how! *jumps onto Kyo’s back* LIKE THIS!
Kyo: Hey–
jo: SALLY FORTH!
Yuki: WOOHOO! Just like the old days!
jo: YUKIHIRO!
Kyo: *falls*
jo: BAD HORSE! *starts whipping him* Get up!
Kyo: You’re mooshing me!
jo: That’s not what you said LAST NIGHT!
Yuki: OOOOOOOOOOH SNAP! *high five*
jo: *high five*
Miyavi: ...I WANT MY MOMMY!
jo: I’m your new mommy.
Miyavi: Hmm, that’ll be a little strange...
jo: Yes. Yes it will.
Kyo: *rolling on the ground* My internal organs......... Oh dear god.....
Mana: *heals Kyo*
Kyo: Wow! Thanks, uhh.... ma’am?
Mana: *shakes his head*
Kyo: ...Sir?
Mana: *shakes his head*
Kyo: Man....a?
Mana: *nod*
Kyo: Woohoo! Do I get a prize now?
jo: You get to marry me!
Sarah: HEY BITCHES I THOUGHT YOU WERE LOOKIN’ FOR ME!
Yuki: Yeash, yeash, we were.
Sarah: Then get to it... stop going off the script. Do you need cue cards or what?
Miyavi: That would be nice.
Kyo: Yeah, like some kind of a wonderful dream...
jo: just like our marriage is gonna be... *cling*
Kyo: STOP CLINGING!
Yuki: If you use fabric softener in the washer that won’t happen...
Sarah: Ok, I think this scene needs to be redone...
Director: CUT!

Take 2 biznatches.

jo: Let us go and find our friend Sarah! WOOSH! *flies into the distance* Follow me!
Miyavi: *also flies into the distance followed by Mana*
Kyo: Wait, I can’t fly! *wind picks up and he soars into the sky* Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Take 3..............

jo: We’re off to see the wizard–
Miyavi: The wonderful wizard of Oz!
Yuki: Because because because because becaaaaaaause–
Kyo: –Yukihiro is an idiot!

JAZZ HANDS!

Millionth time’s a charm... this time no reverting to early episode-esque antics.....

Take 1 million!:

jo: Come on you dumb fucks! Sarah could be out there alone! In the cold! With only the light of her... cell phone... to... O MEIN GOTT! CELL PHONES EXIST!
Yuki: Indeed they do.
Kyo: ...
Miyavi: So call her from the house and tell her to get the hell up here. *starts walking back*
jo: Oh, Miyavi... young, naive, little Miyavi...
Miyavi: *rips a tree branch off a nearby tree and whacks her upside the head with it* CALL HER!
jo: No need to get violent!
Miyavi: RRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWR! *starts whacking Kyo*
jo: OK! I’ll call her, geez... *jo’s phone suddenly rings* Oh, look! It’s her! *answers* STOP CALLING HERE, ASS HAT!
Mana: ...
jo: What Mana, you got sumthin you wanna say to me?
Mana: Do I ever.
Kyo: O mein gott. Please. I do not want to be wandering through the forests of Gackt with you cretins for the rest of eternity. Can you just call her and get her over here so we can go back to sleeping...
Miyavi: MIYAVI NO WANT SREEP! MIYAVI WANT SMASH! *goes after Mana with the tree branch*
Mana: *runs away into the forest, leading Miyavi off into the wilderness where we all know he can never survive because he’s too pretty and sparkly and shiny and pierced*
jo: ...
Kyo: ...
jo: I’m in the forest with Kyo! ALONE! OOOOH BOY!
Kyo: *turns to run but smacks right into a tree*
jo: O MEIN GOTT! Are you ok Kyo?
Kyo: What happened...
jo: You smacked your head right off a tree...
Kyo: Oh... ok. *gets up*
jo: ...
Kyo: What?
jo: Nothing. You’re just cute, that’s all.
Kyo: WHAT?
jo: UGLY! YOU’RE UGLY! ... yeah, ugly... that’s it...
Kyo: *glare* I’m onto you..
jo: Uh, right, well, I think I should call Sarah now... *gets her phone and dials the number*
Sarah: Hello?
jo: Where you at? *LIKE ON THE BOOST MOBILE COMMERCIAL! HAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA*
Sarah: I’m in hell.....
jo: Ok where now?
Sarah: Never mind...
Kyo: No NOT never mind! You get your ass over here right now before I–
Sarah: *appears behind them* Before you what?
Kyo: OH MY GOD IT’S XENA!

(LOL SORRY SARAH COULDN’T RESIST!)

Sarah: *lunges at him*
jo: *knocks him out of the way just before Sarah can get him*
Kyo: YOU SAVED ME!
jo: I know!
Kyo: Now get off.
jo: Oh, darn...
Sarah: Well. Time to go party at Gackt’s house.

Sooooooooooooooooooooooo Sarah, jo, and Kyo begin the long trek from the woods in Gackt’s back yard, back to his mansion. Oh yeah, and I guess Yukihiro is with them too but I kinda forgot about him cause this is too many kids for me to watch. But whatever... Anyway....

Meanwhile, inside the house...

Ruki: *swinging from the chandelier* WOOHOO!
Wang: *going through a random cabinet* HEY! LOOK AT THIS GUYS! *pulls out a remote control*
Ruki: Lemme see that! *let’s go of the chandelier and lands on the table, but the chandelier falls too....knocking him out.*
Reita: DING DONG, THE WITCH IS DEAD! *starts dancing around crazily*
Sakura: Oh no.... we should call.... uh... one of those things......
Reita: Sakura. You are totally wasted.
Sakura: I am not... your momma is totally wasted....
Reita: If I wasn’t so drunk that I couldn’t see, I’d...
Sakura: You’d what? Go on and say it, pretty boy! I can take on you and your nose sock!
Reita: *punches.... misses*
Sakura: Ha-ha! Take this! *picks up a chair and smashes it down next to Reita*
Reita: You missed, stupid...
Sakura: No, you missed, STUPID!

*girly slapfight*

Wang: Look at this! *presses a random button on the remote and a pole comes down from the roof above the table*
Ruki: *magically wakes up* OH BOY! A POLE!
Reita: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! MY EYES! *runs out of the room, followed by everyone else, while music plays and Ruki dances on a pole*

AND NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW! Back to another exciting episode of “Mentally, Socially, and Anger-management Challenged Crackheads in the Woods” ...

Kyo: We’re lost.
jo: Oh my god are you serious Kyo, really I had no idea that we were lost.
Kyo: Yeah, it’s a good thing you ladies have an outdoorsman such as myself to be of your assistance...
Yuki: You’re homeless....?
Kyo: ...not that kind of outdoorsman, you tard...
jo: Kyo, you can “be of my assistance” any time....
Sarah: PREVERTS! PREVERTS!
jo: *grabs her by the shirt collar before she can “run off into the woods” or “run away screaming” or any of those other things that people always seem to do in these*
Sarah: ...darn.
Yuki: My dog-like senses tell me it’s this way!
jo: *grabs him by the shirt collar before he can “run off into the darkness” ... “never to be seen again”, or some such retardation*
Yuki: ...
Kyo: Sigh. I’m doomed.
jo: ...
Kyo: What...?
jo: *puts a dog collar on him and grabs him by it before he can... um... well... ok, I just wanted to put a collar on him*
Kyo: Oh boy! Is this one of those ones that shocks me if I try to leave the yard?!
jo: Yup. Only instead of the yard, it’s my side that you can never leave.... HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Kyo: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.................
Yuki: SHHHHH! You’re going to awaken the beast of the forest!
Sarah: Yukihiro.... you and your drugs...
Yuki: *kicks her in the shin*
Sarah: Hey! You stupid monkey! YA LOOK LIKE E.T.!
Yuki: Well... you look like... you look.... like.... this ROCK! *picks up a rock and pings it off her head*
Sarah: GR! *tackles him and they go rolling down a conveniently-placed mountain side*
jo: Great... *runs after them*
Kyo: *gets shocked* OW! *follows her, trying to rip off the collar*

And then they aaaaaaaaaaaaaall died. THE END!

GAME OVER! || no wait! i have another life!