inside
story
E. Revolution
Scene Commentary by Giampi
Note: This commentary contains spoilers
The Beginning
�You know, lately you�ve been spacing out a lot,� commented Jeff. He joined Ness, who had his nose close to the glass, admiring the hieroglyphics on the tablet. �Care to explain?�
Ness glanced briefly at Jeff, choosing to evade giving any sort of long answer to that question.
Jeff adjusted his thick, round glasses and placed one hand in his blue trousers. �It�s that girl from the dream again, isn�t it?�
When I first got the idea for E. Revolution I decided that I wanted to "re-write" the story keeping only the characters and setting, and changing everything else. This included changing character relationships and, in some parts, even personalities.
In ER, Ness is taciturn and introspective, while Jeff is outgoing and popular with the ladies. This is, of course, in opposition to most other writings of the sort, where Ness is an archetypical heroic figure and Jeff is a hopeless nerd. In the world of ER, they are perfect foils for one another, and this is reflected in the fact that they're best friends since childhood.
ER takes place ten years after the original "EarthBound" would have -- that is to say, in 200X. There is a very specific reason for this, and it has to do with the one thing that makes ER "The story of what could have been." I'm still waiting for someone to tell me exactly what that thing is, so, in the words of Shigesato Itoi, "Have fun using your imagination."
Kai Poo
The eye monster stumbled back; it had been hit in the leg by a star-shaped blast. The monster roared and winced in pain as two more stars crashed into it and crippled it. It stumbled into a lamp post and knocked it over before a final star hit it square in the eye. The monster fell to the floor, and green ooze flowed out of its dead body.
�Hey, kid! Are you okay?�
An Asian man in an oriental-style outfit called out to Ness from his left. His black ponytail, the only piece of hair on his otherwise bald head, flailed as he ran over to Ness and helped him to his feet.
�Y-yeah, I�m fine�just�I�� Ness couldn�t form the words. The man reached into the sleeve of his jacket and pulled out a cell phone, which he snapped open. After pressing a button on it, he turned away from Ness.
Many years ago, more than I would care to admit, I wrote this story called EarthBound Legacies. It was a sprawling epic that took me three years to write, was over 400 pages long, and was so poorly written and executed that the only reason I'm glad I wrote it is because it gave me a great idea of how not to write a story.
Many people disagree with me on this point. Actually, most people disagree with me on this point. They ate up Legacies and loved every bit of it. Back in the days of earthbound.net, I would get fan mail -- imagine that for a second if you will -- and there was this one instance where a guy named his webpage "The EarthBound Legacy" as an homage. There was also another kid who wanted to co-author a story with me that was also kind of campy and not very good.
Point is, he wanted to rename Poo "Kai" because the idea of a character name being a scatological reference didn't sit well with him. By that time I had already been numbed to the idea by sheer repetition (you can only write the words "...said Poo" so many times before it begins to lose its meaning) so I didn't care, but when the time came to write down Poo's name in ER I decided that maybe leaving his name as is wouldn't go over well in the story. Thus, Agent Kai Poo was born. You have to admit that it sounds better than agent Poo.
As for his special psychic attack, it's none other than PSI Starstorm. The problem was that I decided not to include PSI names in the story outright because it interfered with the narrative structure, so the only way to accurately convey the ability was through description. Thus the "star-shaped blasts of energy".
For reference purposes, Ness' "psycholuminescence" is PSI Flash.
The Power Within
Ness looked on helplessly at the creature, which opened its stinking maw and prepared to devour them. The man had slipped off his sunglasses, and was in a similar position. Ness had raised his hand instinctively, hoping subconsciously that it would keep the monster away. As the creature lunged, however, something clicked in Ness� mind.
��Ness��
Ness squeezed his eyes shut, and a brilliant light radiated from his hand. The incandescent flash stopped the monster like a wall, and it began to shriek as it convulsed. The man had raised his arm in order to protect his eyes, and was looking on in astonishment. After a few seconds of twitching the smoldering carcass of the slimy pile slumped to the ground and was still.
The monster that appears, and is subsequently killed, in this particular paragraph is the Slimy Little Pile from the original -- note the use of the words "slimy pile" near the end there. The monsters that siege Fourside in the first chapter are all monsters that appeared in the original as well -- Wooly Shamblers and whatnot -- which is my way of saying that ER does indeed take place in the same world.
Ness' psycholuminescence is the one psychic attack that causes the most damage to Giygas. This is a reference to the ultra-powerful PSI Flash Omega from the game, which could kill many monsters outright. However, since there are no "power levels" in ER, the best way to convey this reference was to make Ness insanely powerful from the beginning.
Mission Statement
�Ten years ago, in the year 199X, as per the prophecies written on an old tomb found inside one of the pyramids of Scaraba, the Earth was attacked by a force of pure, concentrated chaos known only as Giygas. In order to counteract the influence of Giygas on Earth, a special organization known as SANCTUARY was created. As such, SANCTUARY�s main goal is to eradicate any traces of the chaotic force and prevent it from destroying our way of life along with the entirety of the human race. Any questions?�
Not much to say about this. The only real purpose of this blurb was to give the reader a brief info dump, and to establish the difference between the Giygas of "EarthBound" and the Giygas of ER; in the latter, Giygas is not the "universal cosmic destroyer" but rather a force of sheer chaos. This becomes important later.
The Complex
Eventually the two came to a large double door. Painted on the center was a large circle with an image of a horned man holding a sword upside-down to his chest. Along the bottom rim the words �Prodeo Obviam Ordinatio� were written in a simple, bold font. As soon as Poo reached the doorway he retrieved his identification from his sleeve pocket and slid it through a small, black card reader on the wall. There was a beep of confirmation and the doors slid open compliantly.
The only word that could possibly hope to describe the room Ness had just stepped in was �wow�.
Since Giygas is pure chaos, its opposition, SANCTUARY, must forcefully be, or at least represent, order. The SANCTUARY base, although never really explained in the story, is located at Grapefruit Falls, near Threed. Its emblem is the Mani Mani statue -- I didn't really mean to imply anything by this, I just wanted to give SANCTUARY an emblem and the image of the Mani Mani fit the part. The slogan, "Prodeo Obviat Ordinatio" is the closest I could get to "Forwards Towards Order" in Esperanto. This is probably not the correct way to say it, I know.
Boy Meets Girl
Paula closed her eyes and smiled. �When I paint in the dark I can feel the painting�I am unhindered by the subjectivities of my sight.�
As if to illustrate this fact, she closed her eyes and dabbed the paintbrush on a splotch of azure that lay near the center of her palette, and then made two broad strokes. Surprisingly, the strokes accentuated a gray area to the lower right, and complemented the overall rhythm of the work; it was as if Paula knew she had to paint there, somehow. After finishing her demonstration she opened her eyes and stared dreamily at her spectator. All Ness could do in return was stare at the beautiful girl�the girl that had been haunting his dreams for so long�
Paula is...Paula. When I wrote her into the story I made sure to exaggerate the "gifted psychic" aspect of her personality and ended up making her into an indigo child, minus the Attention Deficit Disorder. I really like the way she ended up as a character...I don't think many people would have written her as an artist.
Apple and Orange
�I�m telling you, I was the one who told him about the side effects of the augmentation process!�
�Nuh-uh! It was me, I did it first!�
Once again Ness found himself sitting at a small table in the mess hall, next to Apple and Orange. They were, unsurprisingly, bickering over work; more specifically, who had done what work, and why that person should get credit for it. The argument, which was more annoying than it was aggressive, was interrupted by short, marked silences in which both contenders would eat from their respective trays.
I wanted to include the two inventors in the story from the start, but realized quickly that keeping their original names -- Apple Kid and Orange Kid -- would detract from the narrative. So I removed the "Kid" and just left them as Apple and Orange. They are still highly antagonistic in ER, as they were in the original, but this time around they are also partners, and deep down, best friends who really care about each other. Sort of like Ness and Jeff, only with more techno-jargon.
Apple survived the transition with the least amount of changes to his personality. He's still incredibly smart, smarter than Orange, and is responsible for inventing and refining most of the really cool equipment used at SANCTUARY HQ. However, he's still a slob, a glutton, and an immature little boy.
Orange isn't quite as smarmy and arrogant in ER, but he's cantankerous and uptight. He worries a lot about what other people say about him, and he's very ambitious. All in all, I wanted to convey that Apple is still more likeable than Orange. Ironically, though, I ended up liking Orange more than I did Apple. It's more fun to write as him.
SANCTUARY vs. Strong
Finally, after a moment, he whipped his arms to the side and the doors were literally ripped off their hinges, revealing the black, empty elevator shaft behind them. Without even thinking, Ness jumped into the diagonal shaft and slid towards the bottom.
Apple jumped on Strong�s back and tried to hold him off while Paula tried to get away. The efforts proved fruitless, though, as Strong easily threw him off. Paula�s eyes were in tears now, and she tripped over a cable on the floor while trying to scramble away. She closed her eyes again and began panicking as Strong neared her and prepared to grab her neck.
Then, suddenly, the doors to the elevator were blown open and Ness ran through. As soon as he saw Strong he reached out to him and used psychokinesis to lift him up and slam him into the ceiling.
I really needed to set up a scenario where Jeff turned bad. The only way I could do this and still be convincing was to turn him into the unwilling puppet of the Bad Guys. I didn't really know how I would go about this until I re-read the first chapter and stumbled across some line Kai Poo said about a mole. I had put that in there on a whim, just as something I could use or ignore in the future. In this case, it gave me the perfect opportunity to implement the "Jeff goes bad" scenario I wanted. However, the list of secondary characters at my disposal wasn't too big. In the end, I chose Strong because a)he hadn't had much exposure and it was easy to write his betrayal into the story, and b)I never really liked Chief Strong anyway.
Showdown
With a heave Ness was thrown into the bookshelf, knocking most of the books to the floor and shaking the very foundations of the circular room. Then, without even changing the expression on his face, Jeff strolled up to the other door, the one that was kept closed by all manner of security countermeasures.
Jeff rapped on the door with his knuckles tentatively, oblivious to the struggling teenager behind him and the feeble old man fiddling with a locked drawer in his desk. He reared his fist back slowly, ready to smash the door open, when he heard a very audible click from the desk.
�Step away from that door.� Andonuts held a small pistol in his trembling hand and pointed it threateningly at Jeff. The weapon did little to impress him.
�You don�t have the guts to shoot me,� said the possessed boy.
I had a little trouble writing this in, as I had an objective in mind but no real way to get there. That is, I wanted a showdown between Jeff, Ness, and Andonuts (who, I must stress, is not the same Andonuts as the game, he is a character I came up with); however, I had no really convincing way to get them in the same room at the same time. I believe I pulled it off without sounding too contrived, but I'm not 100% sure. You be the judge.
As for this scene, it contains what is my absolute favorite moment in ER. It's not here in the excerpt, but a bit further down, when Andonuts actually does shoot Jeff. It's this part:
�You�actually shot me. You shot your own nephew��
Andonuts switched the gun to his other hand. �You are not my nephew.�
Andonuts is old, but he's still a bad-ass. He knows how to take charge. That there is the #1 Professor Andonuts moment in ER, and my personal pick for the coolest moment in the story as well. Well, except for the ending, that is.
Unacceptable Loss
Ness gasped for more air. �It�s okay, Jeff�I�ll help you, I swear��
�No one can help me.� Another tear fell, this time on Ness� bruised eye. �They�re all gone�my family�s dead�I can�t do this��
Ness�s breathing was almost back to normal by now. �Jeff�no��
�Just kill me!!� Jeff�s grip suddenly became strong again, and Ness� eyes bulged. He reached out and, in a last ditch effort, grabbed Jeff�s face and pushed it away. To his surprise, there was a soft sizzling sound, and tendrils of smoke appeared on the spots where Ness� hand made contact with Jeff�s flesh. The latter pulled away and covered his face with his hands, screaming in agony. Ness scrambled away, terrified, and watched his friend squirming, heard his painful wails.
Ness is, after Paula, the only person capable of destroying Giygas and beginning the Revolution. As such, his body and mind have qualities that are inherently repugnant to Giygas and make it feel pain. This is why his touch burns Jeff, even after Jeff learns to control the Giygas cells inside him.
Jeff's parents had to die. I'm sorry, that's just the way it had to be. Eventually Ness and Jeff were going back to Fourside, and they weren't going to find Jeff's family anywhere (it wasn't important to the story), so I killed them off. Luckily, when I left Jeff in the first chapter, he was nowhere near his home, so I was able to concoct a scenario where Giygas destroyed the building where he lived, while his parents were still in it. This also gave me the chance to flesh out his character a little; he was holding in his grief, but the series of events that led up to the fight with Ness broke his spirit. It's sad, but it makes for great storytelling.
Ceremony
The crowd fell completely and absolutely silent, and then dropped to their knees. Ness didn�t move, opting instead to continue staring at the priest as he made his way ceremoniously to a large, golden scarab incrusted on one of the lower stones of the pyramid. He thrust the hilt of the ankh into a hole on the scarab�s back, and then twisted it clockwise. Immediately part of the wall began to rumble and shift until the mechanism on the inside of the pyramid was activated and the entire panel slid to the side, revealing, of all things�
�That tablet��
Okay...this is the part where I explain all the hard-to-understand parts of ER. Pay attention.
When Giygas attacked Scaraba two thousand years prior to "EarthBound", the Scarabans built a pyramid to hide themselves and waited for Giygas to leave. In ER, the Scarabans not only defeat Giygas, but manage to contain it. The pyramid was constructed as a means of imprisoning it forever. THIS RIGHT HERE is the one thing I mentioned earlier. The fact that Giygas was defeated screwed with the normal "EB" timeline and made it into ER. I was hoping someone would get this as early as the third chapter (it's mentioned in the prophecy Kai Poo discusses with the Professor), but alas, it was not to be.
Anyway, when the Scaraban pharaoh defeated Giygas and sealed him in the pyramid, he thought it was over. His main priest knew better. He knew that the pyramid wouldn't hold forever, so he devised a way for someone in the future to know how to defeat Giygas again when the time came. The priest sealed the pyramid entrance with his blood so that it would last longer. He also encoded his message in a stone, set in a tablet, and made it so that only someone with a specific type of brainwave could read it. Originally, this was Paula, but we all know what happened to her. Ness was the next best candidate. If you want a reason for Ness' weird dreams at the beginning, this is it: Paula's psyche was reaching out to him because she knew, deep down, the he could do what she couldn't.
The scene where Ness sees his mother is due to the fact that Andonuts touched the stone while it was busy dumping all this information into Ness' brain. I was also hoping that someone would notice the inconsistency in the story -- namely, that it's pretty weird for Ness to jump from the Scaraba of 20 years ago to the memories of Prof. Andonuts. Oh well.
Family Matters
Andonuts leaned forward. �I did what I had to do to assure the safety of the tablet. Right now that�s all that matters.�
Jeff�s eyes glazed over with tears as he stood abruptly and pounded his fists on the wooden desk. �And what about my family?! They died and you haven�t even thought about it! All you think about is your damn tablets and those stupid prophecies!!�
�I did not,� interrupted Andonuts, his tone suddenly deep and threatening, �wish for things to be this way. I brought you here because you are all that I have left. Do not make accusations like that ever again.�
Jeff averted his gaze to avoid making eye contact and sat back down. �You say that but you called me here anyway.�
�Meaning?�
The blonde scoffed. �Please, don�t patronize me,� he growled.
You're Jeff. Your uncle just shot you and admitted that he kind of cares for tablets whose ages figure in the millennia, more than he does you. How would you feel?
Revelations
Instantly Ness leapt on him and grabbed his neatly-folded collar. �That wasn�t acid in the water! It was blood! The blood was keeping the door sealed! You set it free and you didn�t know it!�
Maxwell Labs frowned. �How did you��
�That�s quite enough,� interrupted Andonuts calmly. �Ness, you have just suffered a very traumatic experience, and you have not fully recovered. Please, go back to the infirmary and rest.�
Again, a feeble attempt at enlightening the reader to the backstory from the previous chapter.
Maxwell Labs is there because I ran out of characters, again. I needed someone who was like Professor Andonuts, a scientist, only different. Since Brick Road, Mr. Fork, and Mr. Spoon were too ridiculous to make into sadistic madmen, I chose Labs.
Labs was in love with Ness' mother, but she was too busy marrying Ness' dad and procreating to notice. He blames Andonuts for her death, even though in reality he was to blame, and this hatred becomes the sole reason for his existence. He eventually loses it by the end of the story. He's crazy. I love him.
The Newcomer
�That boy is more capable than you can ever imagine,� he retorted. �As are all of my recruits. Never forget that.�
�Please spare me the attitude, Professor,� scoffed Maxwell Labs. �First that orphan from Dalaam, then the girl��
�You were just as interested in Paula as I was.�
��then your nephew, who�s possessed by Giygas��
�And in full control of it, I assure you.�
��and now this lunatic boy. I daresay I have my work cut out for me.�
More backstory. Some years prior to the start of ER, SANCTUARY participates in a joint project with Maxwell Labs' group, DREAMERS. The project involved using a special device nicknamed the Devil's Machine to amplify psychic powers and destroy Giygas forever. Kai Poo was to be the subject, but he was switched for Paula at the last minute. The project backfired, and Giygas was not destroyed, but Paula was. However, the machine altered both of them to the point where a part of Giygas took on Paula's shape and memories, effectively turning Paula into Giygas. The inspiration for this came from an old episode of the Batman animated TV series, where Robin befriends a girl who's running from Clayface, only to find out that the girl is Clayface, or a part of him.
When the Devil's Machine is rebuilt and made into Operation Rainy Circle, it uses an imperfect version of the psychic augmentation mechanism, which means that it hurts psychics as well as Giygas (thus proving that they are part of the same "system" and not diametrical opposites). This technology is the same stuff Apple and Orange were forced to use on Strong a few chapters before this.
The Set-Up
�He wants to get us out of the way.�
Orange turned to look at Poo, who was sitting calmly in his place with arms crossed and closed eyes obscured by his sunglasses. �Meaning?�
�Think about it.� Poo raised a hand and began pointing to each person in the Sky Runner as he mentioned them. �Jeff, the boy who�s presumably �infested� with Giygas; Ness, the wild card who was let into SANCTUARY at a moment�s notice; Professor Andonuts� personal assistant and bodyguard.� Suddenly his hands waved over Apple and Orange. �Two scientists to make it look official�� finally, he jabbed his thumb at Tony.
��and finally, one of his own men to baby-sit. He wanted to get rid of anyone who posed a threat to his plans.� He lowered his sunglasses and cast a piercing stare at the DREAMERS soldier. �Am I right?�
Again, Maxwell Labs at his most cunning. Need I say more?
Frank
The man in pink chuckled. �Looks like we got a couple of heroes here,� he said coyly. �We don�t have those in Onett anymore�you must be from out of town.�
�So what if I am?�
The leader of the gang glanced at his two henchmen and jerked his head towards Ness and Poo. Immediately the two scraggly teens let go of their prey, who took advantage of the situation and ran away as fast as her legs could carry her. The one in pink sheathed his knife in his buttoned-up jacket and adjusted his loosely-made tie
�I think we should teach you guys a lesson in Onett-style politeness,� he snickered. �Rule number one: never, ever, mess with the Sharks.�
What is Onett without Frank? Nothing, that's what.
Since ER is a more grown up version of the original game, Frank had to become more mature as well. Here, he's more than just a rowdy teenager; he's a criminal, a murderer, and it can be inferred from his fashion sense that he's also a pimp. Mugging people just happens to be his hobby.
In ER, Ness does not live in Onett. Therefore, he can't have beaten up Frank, which means Frank was free to take over the town a long time ago. However, he's still a doofus at heart, and without his gang to back him up he's nothing more than an annoying child who desperately wants to fit in and be cool. The short time he spends in SANCTUARY makes him grow up.
Poo's Past
There was a pause before Andonuts spoke once more. �You can�t save Dalaam, Kai. Not anymore. Please understand that.�
The agent�s penetrating gaze faltered. �I know.�
�Do you?� The Professor rose and hobbled over to his prot�g�. He placed his gnarled, bony hand on his shoulders. �Do you remember what you said to me the first time you were brought here, after Dalaam was destroyed?�
Poo nodded. �I said I would join you if I could help destroy Giygas.�
The Professor nodded. �You also said that you would destroy them the first chance you got. I know you have grown much stronger, but there is no way you can stand up to a force that powerful by yourself. Now please, promise me that you will never let your vendetta get in the way of your rational judgment.�
Poo looked into Andonuts� eyes.
When Poo was a child, his homeland of Dalaam was attacked by Giygas, leaving him as the sole survivor. It is not mentioned in the story, but the sudden appearance of his psychic powers are what saved him. The Dalaamese are actually descendants of an eastern-dwelling group of Scarabans in ER, which is why they have the same prophecies. Poo's vendetta against Giygas is what drives him, and it turned him into a loyal, hardworking protector for both Professor Andonuts and Paula, who he feels compelled to protect because of what happened to her during Operation Giant Step. When he witnesses a situation similar to that of his childhood in Onett, his rage flares up once again.
As the heir to the Dalaamese throne, Poo is able to wield the Jun Zhu Tan, the Sword of Kings. The blade channels PSI and is generally a very bad thing to have pointed at you when Poo is angry. I imagine it looks like the Green Destiny from Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, down to the sound it makes when held in the air. The name, Jun Zhu Tan was the closest I could get to "Sword of Kings", or something similar, in Chinese using an online translator.
The scene where Poo goes berserk on an entire city full of monsters was the only scene in the story where I allowed myself to break the so-called "wall of realism". The characters in ER were capable of doing extraordinary things, but they were not anim� stereotypes that could leap several meters into the air, punch through solid steel, and speak with their eyes closed. However, I allowed Poo this kind of behavior to demonstrate that he was mad, and he didn't take crap from anyone. To compensate for this I made sure that he wasn't as powerful when he was calm, even when faced with the apocalyptic events of the final chapter.
"I was with her!"
�Ness�you�re burning up! You overexerted yourself way too much back there.�
�I had to�� answered Ness with a wry chuckle. �I had to find Paula��
�Paula? You don�t mean the dream girl, do you?�
Another chuckle. �It�s been a while since you called her that.�
Jeff frowned and shook his head. �You really are messed up. I thought you had finally got over that whole deal with that dream.�
The chuckles stopped. A pang of fear hit the pit of Ness� stomach. �What�are you talking about?�
Towards the end of the story, during Operation Rainy Circle, Paula realizes her true identity, and decides to leave SANCTUARY because she realizes that she's the reason Giygas keeps attacking it -- to get to her. With her awakened powers, she fuses herself with the Devourer and retroactively erases any trace of her presence, even within the memory of the people close to her. The only reason Ness remembers her is because of his tremendous psychic power and his psychic affinity with Paula.
The Devourer itself was directly inspired by the Time Devourer of "Chrono Cross". I really like the idea of an all-powerful being whose only purpose in life is to destroy, mainly because it's nifty when the antagonist of a story is stripped of its personality and emotions -- it makes the author emphasize the protagonists' personalities more.
But I digress. The point is that I wanted to implement an earth-shattering plot point as far as stories of this type go -- and I daresay I succeeded. I also wanted to set up the events of Chapter 13 so that I could jump right in without having to do a lot of explaining first. I think it worked.
Agenda
Ness� eyes narrowed. �You can�t make me do anything to help you.�
Maxwell Labs chortled. �Oh, we�ll see about that. All I need is a tiny surge of psychic energy�once that happens, the system will take hold of you and do the rest on its own. Of course, it�ll kill you in the process, but that�s a small price to pay.� The commander paused for a second. �Funny, that�s the same thing I said to that girl when I last used this machine.�
That girl�was he talking about Paula?
�But that�s in the past.� Maxwell Labs disappeared from Ness� view once more. �After today, I�ll have destroyed it, every last bit. There won�t be anything left.�
�Are you talking about Giygas or SANCTUARY?�
Maxwell Labs was unable to answer that question.
Before Operation Rainy Circle, Maxwell Labs kept himself in check and made sure to be as cunning as possible so that his plans could be set in motion. However, by the time his plans reach fruition and he almost gets what he wants, he lets it all hang out psychologically. It is here that the reader finally realizes that Maxwell Labs "died" along with Ness' mother, and the only thing left is this inhuman...thing. Maxwell Labs, in fact, is as much a force of chaos as is Giygas. By this point it should be perfectly clear that he is, in essence though not in fact, a human Giygas. This plays into the philosophical background of the story, which I'll expound upon further down.
Operation Rainy Circle
A few seconds later several screens, showing different parts of the evacuation route, came into view, superimposed on the glass. Every single shot showed SANCTUARY agents falling to the ground, wriggling in pain and letting out screams of pure agony. Frank Fly, the one coordinating the evacuation and the only person unaffected by these mysterious symptoms, rushed to the person nearest him and knelt down. Ignoring his own vanity and personal grooming, he slipped off his pink jacket and used it to wipe off as much blood as he could while futilely trying to revive the injured young woman.
More evidence that psychics, and by extension humans, are linked to Giygas and not, as Professor Andonuts would argue, its antipodes. I don't have an exact explanation for why this is, in the sense that I don't have a concise explanation for the relationship between the two. The only thing I can say is that they are part of the same reality and the same way of viewing the world.
The Last Person You'd Expect
Maxwell Labs was about to erupt into another fit of laughter when the walls of the hangar were rocked by a loud explosion that obliterated one of the walls facing the outside. Most of the elites were caught by the debris, and anyone who wasn�t was forced to retreat just so they wouldn�t be trampled by the gargantuan Sky Runner that broke in and occupied half the hangar.
The front ramp came down quickly, revealing the lone form of Tony, the sole occupant of the mammoth transport. Before anyone could react he dashed forward, lobbing a grenade at the tall spire that powered Labs� terrible machine, and then took cover by diving to the floor. The machine was completely destroyed almost instantly by the explosive. Immediately thereafter Ness� body stopped convulsing and he began to regain control of his body.
Tony was written into ER to accomplish two things: one, to give some attention to a character that is often ignored and underestimated. Two, to prove that homosexuals can kick ass too.
Shigesato Itoi merely implied Tony's homosexuality in the original. I, on the other hand, make it very explicit: Tony openly manifests his interest in Jeff, first physically, then emotionally. Later on, he also proves to be a very good person to have in a fight, as he represents the pinnacle of DREAMERS' military training. Fortunately, Ness and the others help him see through his fanatical devotion for Maxwell Labs.
Tony, Orange, and Maxwell Labs are my three favorite characters in the story because they have the most interesting personalities. This particular scene, or rather, what comes shortly afterwards, are what made me glad to include them in the story in the first place.
Destruction
The last thought that went through Maxwell Labs� head was that of a woman that he loved a long time ago. The last thought that went through Professor Andonuts� head was that of hope, and the future he had imagined for his nephew. The last thing either of them heard was the sound of a girl crying softly.
The entire SANCTUARY base was consumed in one terrifying explosion. The Devourer, no matter how powerful, simply could not withstand an attack of that magnitude, and began to shriek in pain as parts of it dropped off and melted. The flames consumed it, dissolved it within them mercilessly, along with everything else that was nearby. If the Devourer felt fear, it was short-lived.
The small Sky Runner that was flying overhead shook violently from the shockwave produced by the blast. The Runner�s passengers could only look sadly as the blast consumed their former home, their former life.
The scene where Andonuts blows up the SANCTUARY base to kill the Devourer was lifted from "RahXephon," where the same thing happens only with a different monster and a different person pressing the button. Come to think of it, a great deal of ER's aesthetic was lifted straight from that series.
Apparition
�Paula��
Jeff and Poo heard Ness� voice and glanced over at him. It didn�t take long for them to follow Ness� gaze and spot what he was looking at. She was far away, floating in the sky like an angel, her pink dress and long hair billowing in the wind. It was hard to make out her shape in the distance, but she was definitely there, and she was definitely Paula.
�No way�� Jeff slipped off his glasses, rubbed his eyes, and placed the lenses back on. �Is that�?�
Despite appearances, Paula is not actually "there" when the others see her. She abandoned the Devourer before it was killed and went to Fourside, and the apparition that the others see is merely an echo of what was once there. Paula's physical form is gone by this point, as she has fused herself with Giygas because she believed it's what she had to do (she would later express her unwillingness to go through with this in the final chapter). The stress from the destruction of SANCTUARY weakened the minds of the others to the point that Ness' psychic powers were able to overwhelm Paula's mental seal, thus recovering everyone's memories.
She Lives
�Who�s out there? Who are you?� A delicate, feminine voice rang out from the same direction as the fire. A few others could be heard as well, but this one stood out more than the rest, particularly so for Ness.
�Tracy�� his voice didn�t work, but his lips mouthed the words. �Tracy�Tracy! Is that you!�
When Ness returns to Fourside, the place is a post-apocalyptic ruin. Most of it isn't even there anymore. Only a small group of humans was able to survive by hiding within the crumbling buildings and feeding off the (slowly rotting) food reserves found in abandoned stores and supermarkets. It is not a nice place to be, at all.
Fortunately for Ness, Tracy managed to survive the initial attack on Fourside and group together with other people, though it is plainly obvious that they can only survive in those conditions for a few more weeks before starving to death. Fourside is a colossal city, and there aren't any other major population centers around or near it, so traveling somewhere else is out of the question. All anyone can do is await death.
Unlike Tracy, Ness' father died during the events of the first chapter. I wasn't going to make this so initially, but when I was writing this chapter I thought: hey, we never see Ness' father in the game, why should this be any different?
Yes, I'm cruel and I like killing people off for dramatic effect. You don't have to tell me, I know.
Arrival
�Show me where you are!�
Immediately the Starmen retracted their tentacles and stood in silence. Ness� scream echoed through the encampment, reverberating through the Starmen�s metallic bodies and setting off a low hum. No one moved, not even him.
By the time he noticed the pink flaps of her dress, she was already walking amongst the Starmen with her eyes fixed on the ground. She was immaculate, clean, and almost unearthly compared to Ness� grimy clothes and battered body. The wind played with her hair and dress, but the air did not carry her smell towards him, because she had none. Jeff and Poo shifted their positions so as to stand by Ness on either side of him. The three of them waited until she had finished gliding past the Starmen to try and speak, but Paula hushed them immediately.
The reason it took me so long to finish ER was because I couldn't come up with an appropriate transition between the beginning of the twelfth chapter and all the stuff that happened at the end of it. In the beginning, Ness and crew would stumble upon a group of people who set up a primitive camp in the middle of the city and lived like savages, brandishing spears and wearing body armor like something out of Mad Max. They would all worship the color blue and be called Happy Happyists. Their meddling in all things PSI would 'summon' Giygas and set off the chain of events that make up the end of the story.
Luckily for me, I was able to realize in time that this idea was bunk. However, my failure to come up with something better meant that I couldn't really finish the story, thus the one-year hiatus before I went, "to hell with it" and just made Giygas pop in out of nowhere. Of course, I do have some dignity so I made it so that Giygas popped in as dramatically as I could. So far, I believe the second half of the twelfth chapter to be the most contrived in the story, but it sets up the final chapter and manages to not come off as entirely implausible, so I'm satisfied with it.
Battle
He was going to continue, but something smacked into his side and he fell to the floor. His rib cracked painfully and, despite the darkness that made it hard to see, he could tell that he was bleeding. Acting on instinct, he launched a wave of psycholuminescence that did nothing other than provoke a shriek of rage from Giygas. Something�a huge tentacle�tried to whip at him in response, and Ness knocked it away with telekinesis, but he miscalculated and the tip of the tentacle flew into the air, straight towards Paula, who merely stared at the projectile, knowing it wouldn�t harm her. She only flinched when the air around her was suddenly displaced and Agent Poo stood before her, deflecting the tentacle with a flick of his blade.
�You know, I�m supposed to be your bodyguard too,� he said, without facing her. �As well as the Professor, I mean.�
The final chapter takes place on a planetoid the size of the moon that is made up of concentrated Giygas. Paula's pseudo-consciousness gave it an atmosphere, and gravity, but that's it. The main characters are at the mercy of whatever's there.
The scene where Paula shows Ness and the others her past was planned as something really bloody and shocking; I was going to make it so that Paula manipulated corpses and rotting flesh as puppets, and made it appear that they were walking, talking people, only to have the illusion shatter. Ness and the others would watch in horror as Paula's parents, her house, and even the ground they were on magically transformed into pulsating, rotten flesh. In the end I decided against it.
This scene in particular is a take on the classic Japanese-RPG motif that everything is possible if your friends are with you. Essentially, Paula is convinced that she is a splinter of Giygas' being, and Ness proves her wrong by protecting her from the crossfire of his battle with Giygas, that is, protecting her from herself. Eventually Paula realizes that she is a real person, even if she's just a copy of someone else, and manages to break free.
Believe
�Ness�I�m so afraid��
Ness used his blood soaked hands to caress her cheek.
�Don�t be afraid. I believe in you, Paula�.�
His hand fell to the floor. Paula grabbed it and began shaking it, but Ness was too far gone. She grabbed him by the shoulders and buried her face in his chest until she felt she was pressing so hard she was hurting him. Then she got up and screamed.
The sky shattered. Light began pouring in as explosions rocked the core of the second moon. Paula produced as much psychic damage as she could before falling to the ground.
�Hey, look at that.�
Frank glanced upwards and was surprised to find that the second moon was lighting up.
Ness dies. As a matter of fact, so do Jeff, Paula, and Poo. They come back, certainly, but they do die at this point.
What happens here is that Paula breaks away from Giygas and destroys it outright. While this eliminates the threat of its power from the Earth, it doesn't solve the problem completely, as humanity is trapped in a reality where they need an antinomic force to balance it out. Humanity and Giygas are trapped in a cycle where they will repeatedly destroy themselves for all eternity, unless someone, namely Ness, puts a stop to it.
Revolution
The Passing of Time will shatter. The Nightmare Rock will reveal the Path of Light.
Two chunks of rock floated in front of him, blocking out the sun. Time froze for Ness, and he could see a clear path leading to Earth between those two rocks.
The sheer power of Ness� will propelled him towards the space between those two rocks and towards his home. While in motion he was overcome with a deep sense of peace. He could feel Paula, Jeff, and Poo trailing behind him. Every question he had ever asked himself suddenly had an answer, clear as spring water. He felt reborn. He felt that everything was reborn.
And then we will begin the Revolution.
It's amazing how much you can change a sentence just by adding a period to it in the middle.
The End...?
Jeff took off his glasses and looked at his reflection in the lenses. He was pleased to see that his eyes were bright blue again. �So this is what you call enlightenment,� he whispered to himself before putting the lenses back on.
Poo approached Ness from behind and put a hand on his shoulder. �They�re all here because of you,� he said. �You were the one who made all of this possible.�
�Maybe,� replied Ness. �But I wasn�t alone.� He tightened his grip on Paula. She hugged him back.
�What do we do now, Ness?� asked Paula.
The inherent philosophy that drives the story of ER is dischordianism. I won't go into detail, but essentially dischordianists argue that chaos and order are necessary parts of life and neither should be eliminated. However, there is such a thing as "constructive" order/disorder and "destructive" order/disorder. Humanity, by locking itself in a loop of infinite antagonism with Giygas, ushered itself down the path of "destructive" order and disorder, with Giygas as "destructive disorder" and humanity as "destructive order".
I snuck two musical references into the final chapter. The first one is when Ness says, "I believe in you," which to an "EB" fan should be readily recognizable as one of the lines in Pollyanna. The second is when the secondary characters are watching the second moon explode from Earth and Frank says, "This is the end...this is the end of the world." It's a reference to Apocalypse Please by Muse, which is like the final chapter of ER in musical form.
Anyway, back to the apocalypse. Paula destroys Giygas once and for all, and Ness' mind is freed from the confines of his body in a phenomenon similar to astral projection -- a normal person would have simply ceased to be during the explosion. He floats through outer space for a bit, until he reaches some sort of enlightened state and finds a way to "reset" the universe simply by altering the way he perceives reality. He revives all the people he has lost throughout the story, and also everyone who has ever been killed by Giygas, and wipes the Earth clean of the millennia-old conflict that begot the human race. Paula, Jeff, and Poo go through similar ordeals, but Ness is the one to do all the world-renewing things that the prophecy spoke of.
(Of course, Jeff is smarter so he assimilates all this information first. Go Jeff.)
I have conflicting feelings about the ending. On the one hand, there is another point in the story which I find more compelling (and I said as much earlier); on the other, the ending blows my mind and is the best one I have ever written, which isn't saying much, but hey. I'd say that the moment where Andonuts shoots Jeff is the coolest moment in the story, but the ending is the best.
The phrase "We don't have to think like that anymore," is probably my favorite line, though. It embodies the resolution of the philosophical conflict put forth by the story in a way that is both precise and open to interpretation. Humanity is now free of the shackles it put upon itself, ready to build a new reality where concepts like good, evil, civilization, progress, etc. don't exist. Essentially they have been placed in the Garden of Eden and given a clean slate. It doesn't even matter who did what anymore: everyone has limitless potential.
I've always wondered what Shigesato Itoi would have to say about the message ER so humbly tries to convey. Would he enjoy the story? Condemn it? Would he agree with my ideas? Or would he shoot me down for them?
I don't know. After all, I'm just an aspiring writer, trying to tell a decent story.
EFR
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