Chris = jeepe114 (das the real thing, kids... if he's ever on it anymore, i dare you to IM him)
Me = CRAxYizme
Conversation 4: Stories
Plus + One-liners
SWEDISH FISH WHILE I WAS GONE
LLALLADLGUGUHH!!!ADAUUGH!!!!!!!!!
jeepe114: noooo@!!! i love swedish fish!!!
CRAxYizme: i love them WAY more
jeepe114: how bout this, u can have the red
ones and i get the rest
CRAxYizme: screw you
CRAxYizme: they're all red - the original kind
jeepe114: bleh!!!
jeepe114: get the assorted ones!
CRAxYizme: you get the assorted ones! may i
remind you, right now YOU don't have any at all
jeepe114: *sitcks tongue out*
CRAxYizme: mmm... red chewy confectioner
epipheny!
jeepe114: *rolls eyes and turns away from u*
CRAxYizme: *starts throwing little red swedish
fish at u, aiming for your ears*
jeepe114: *picks up a large stone and starts
tossing it from hand to hand*
CRAxYizme: *eyes widen; sits back in chair and
placidly pops red swedish fish in my mouth*
jeepe114: hehe
CRAxYizme: *enjoying their savory sweet
goodness so much i feel the need to make little moans
and fall to the floor*
jeepe114: *sits down on floor next to u and
raises eyebrow*
CRAxYizme: *shoves a swedish fish in your
mouth*
jeepe114: mmmm, yummy *smiles*
CRAxYizme: put down the rock now
jeepe114: *tosses it aside*
CRAxYizme: share *hands him the bag of swedish
fish, smiles back*
jeepe114: *yay*
CRAxYizme: haha
jeepe114: im so overjoyed, now i can
partake in sugarry excess!!!
CRAxYizme: damn.. you make me miss them
already
jeepe114: *hands back the bag*
CRAxYizme: *grins widely* thank you
CRAxYizme: *dumps half the bag in my lap, hands
it back*
jeepe114: lol
CRAxYizme: *starts making up a song that goes
something like "swedish fish rock my world; swedish
fish, you know they rock my world; they're fishes,
they're swedish, oh... swedish fish, they rock my
world away!"*
jeepe114: *rolls eyes again*
CRAxYizme: *pouts at you* i don't like people who
can't appreciate my spontaneity
jeepe114: im the epitome of spontinaeity,
*makes robot noises* RAAAHHRRR imma kill
u, im a robot!
CRAxYizme: *shrieks*
CRAxYizme: *in a desperate reaction, throws
swedish fish at your eyeballs*
jeepe114: ow hey!!!
CRAxYizme: *is actually sorry* *kisses your
eyeballs all better*
jeepe114: aww ok
...
CRAxYizme: *eats actual swedish fish and reads
online journal entries while our parable seems to
drive to a grinding halt*
jeepe114: lol, sorry i was gawking at my
magnificent.....
CRAxYizme: ERECTION. yah, i know
jeepe114: photography, yeah thats
it....*cough*
CRAxYizme: lmao
jeepe114: no really, i took some negatives of
random household objects
CRAxYizme: random household objects... like
erections
jeepe114: LOL
jeepe114: no of lamps and doors and
keyboards
CRAxYizme: bo-ring
jeepe114: ok, so i threw a couple boners in
there too
CRAxYizme: i'm glad
jeepe114: really? cuz i didnt
CRAxYizme: dammit!
CRAxYizme: why do you feel the need to trick me?
jeepe114: i tried taking one of my toes but i
got too aroused to operate the camera
CRAxYizme: LMAO
CRAxYizme: your erection just kept getting in the
way of the shot, i'm sure
jeepe114: yes, im THAT well-endowed that i
couldnt see my feet....most fat ppl have the
same complaint but no, its my cock once
again being inconvenient
CRAxYizme: bet your erection is just as sarcastic as
you are too
jeepe114: and just as spiteful
CRAxYizme: it gives bunny ears to your toe right
before you take the picture, just to piss you off
jeepe114: lol
CRAxYizme: haha.... piss
CRAxYizme: piss you off
CRAxYizme: your erection is hysterical
jeepe114: yeah i got the pun
CRAxYizme: what can i say? i'm a pundit
jeepe114: he's quite serious actually, he's got
a very dry sense of humor
CRAxYizme: i can see that
CRAxYizme: what else makes your erection a good
first date?
jeepe114: he has uncanny taste in flowers?
CRAxYizme: lol
jeepe114: and carries on a good
conversation
CRAxYizme: that so?
jeepe114: i guess, he typed it
CRAxYizme: lmao
pillowcase full of milk duds*
jeepe114: *cowers to floor* oh please dotn hit
me!!!
jeepe114: im frail!!!
CRAxYizme: that would hurt, wouldn't it?
jeepe114: *nods*
CRAxYizme: *camera angle zooms in stylistically
high with sinister effect, i whack you across the chest
with the deadly duds and quip "melts in your
mouth... not in your hand, bitch."
jeepe114: ooooof!!
jeepe114: so....wanna make out now?
jeepe114: j/k
jeepe114: hehe
CRAxYizme: *laughs as it comes across the screen
at sundance to art-school asshole applause*
CRAxYizme: ooh! that line fit perfectly into the
script!
jeepe114: *smiles*
CRAxYizme: then i'd say like "all right. first, let
me finish this hot chocoloate. you gotta do the
laundry too"
jeepe114: *brushes hair over my eyes*
CRAxYizme: "then i'll churn your butter, baby."
you: "have you been listening to that free blues
sampler cd again?" me: "...that's none of your
business"
jeepe114: i always get the crap jobs
CRAxYizme: (i'm listening to a 6$ blues cd right
now... worth every cent, mm hmm)
jeepe114: im listeing to my bro's gay video
game
jeepe114: grrr
CRAxYizme: *tsk tsk* your brother's stupid video
game
jeepe114: retarded
CRAxYizme: *tsk tsk* ... though that is more
effective
jeepe114: u politically correct twat
CRAxYizme: LOL
jeepe114: screw correctness
CRAxYizme: NOW i want to make out
jeepe114: lol
jeepe114: *rips me shirt off*...nah, its too cold
for that....*hurriedly puts it back on*
CRAxYizme: hey.. correcting is important
CRAxYizme: *eyes the milk dud pillowcase. racks
brain for dirty ideas* ...hmm..
jeepe114: *raises eyebrow*
CRAxYizme: *hesitatingly covers body in milk
duds. wrinkles nose* nah...
CRAxYizme: this sucks
jeepe114: *sits down and picks a couple off*
ehhh, i prefer whoppers
CRAxYizme: LOL
CRAxYizme: whoppers... that's hot
jeepe114: *spits a milk dud out* dammit!!! i
hate the messed up super hard ones!!!
CRAxYizme: *looks at you angrily* you're ruining
the moment.
jeepe114: sorry....*puts it back in my mouth*
CRAxYizme: *frustrated, stands up and begins
wiping off the sticky duds*
jeepe114: *sighs and lays facedown on bed*
CRAxYizme: *sigh, looks around room* maybe i
should just... take my clothes off or something.
*ponders this*
jeepe114: ugh i always ruin it
jeepe114: *sits up real quik* eh?
CRAxYizme: *pats your shoulder* it's okay. do
you want some hot chocolate?
jeepe114: yes!
CRAxYizme: okay. i'll make some more
jeepe114: *yay*
CRAxYizme: *pauses in the doorway* ...naked.
jeepe114: oooh
jeepe114: *takes my shirt and socks off and
follows u*
CRAxYizme: *calls over shoulder* clean up the
milk duds and put that pillowcase in the laundry!
jeepe114: right-o
CRAxYizme: (lol)
jeepe114: *walks out naked* im done w/ my
crap jobs
CRAxYizme: *opens cupboard* hey! there's only
two hot chocolates left! *disturbed* i only had three
cups this morning. did you have one?
jeepe114: ummm
jeepe114: u drank it?
CRAxYizme: ...oh yeah
CRAxYizme: ok, four cups
CRAxYizme: sorry... i know, i'm trying to limit it