SOME ONE LINERS TO OFFEND DAMN NEAR
EVERYONE....
How can you tell the Irish guy is in the hospital?
> > He's the one blowing the foam off of his bedpan
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Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby?
> > They named him Sum Ting Wong.
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What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
> > A speech impediment.
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What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half mast?
> > They're hiring.
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Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
> > Breasts don't have eyes.
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What do you call an Alabama farmer with a sheep under each arm?
> > A pimp.
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Why do drivers education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
> > Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.
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What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
> > A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage, along with a recipe.
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How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say f*ck?
> > Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!
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What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
> > A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..."
> > A southern fairytale begins 'Y'all ain't
gonna believe this shit...
THAT AIN'T NOTHIN'....CHECK THIS
OUT....
"I'M A HIGH STRUNG, POLITE $%#%$# WITH
MORALS!!!!"