Christmas Carols
for the
Psychiatrically Challenged

SCHIZOPHRENIA: Do you Hear What I Hear?

MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISORDER: We Three Queens Disoriented Are

DEMENTIA:I Think I'll Be Home for Christmas

NARCISSISTIC: Hark the Herald Angels Sing about Me

MANIC: Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Busses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and....

PARANOID: Santa Claus Is Coming to Get Me.

PERSONALITY DISORDER: You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll tell you Why.

DEPRESSION: Silent Anhedonia, Holy Anhedonia, All is Flat, All is Lonely.

OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DISORDER: Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell...(Better start again.)

PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE PERSONALITY: On the First Day of Christmas My True Love Gave to Me (and then took it all away).

BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER: Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire.

AND, OF COURSE......

FREAKNESS:
UHHHHHHHH.......Rudolph is comin' to town with jingle bells, not silver bells 'cause those belonged to Frosty who was roasting on an open fire while he was dreamin' of a white X-mas, so Red Nose was forced to go over the river and through the woods which resulted in the Chipmunks being run over by a reindeer, which pissed Santa off so Rudy got nuttin' for X-mas, which meant that Santa baby had no deerlights so we truly had a Silent night….and a Green X-mas
(not 'blue', cause Freaks don't like blue).
But, Chocolate is cool.

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