| Chapter 37 Dr. McKenna walked into the waiting room to three sets of very worried eyes. "How is he?" Bob asked. "He made it through surgery. He's in recovery right now," he answered, "They were able to repair the damage, but he's lost a lot of blood. It will take him some time to regain his strength. Also, he re-broke the bone in his wrist. They have him in a modified brace. It keeps his wrist immobile, while leaving the area around his stitches bare." "Can we see him?" Diane asked. "Not yet. He'll probably be in recovery for a while, then we're gonna set him up in the psych ward so we can keep an eye on him. I'll let you see him after we get him settled, but that will probably be a few hours yet," Dr. McKenna said. Diane sighed and looked out the window. She wanted to see Nick, make sure for herself that he was alright. "Diane, I know you want to be with him right now, but I'm keeping his visitation limited for a reason," Dr. McKenna said, "I need to make sure that Nick isn't a harm to others or to himself before he's allowed to see anyone." "Nick would never hurt me," she said. "No, the Nick you know wouldn't. But the man laying in the recovery room right now isn't the Nick you know is he?" Dr. McKenna asked. Diane shook her head, a tear trailing down her cheek. "I can see how much you care for him, and I'll let you see him as soon as I can, but right now why don't you all go home. Get cleaned up and then come back. Maybe by then we'll have him moved," the doctor suggested. Bob walked over to Diane, "The doc's right. We don't want Nick seeing us like this." Diane looked down at her clothes, they were stained with Nick's blood. "Alright, but I don't want to take to long," she said. "We won't, I promise," Bob said. "And when you come back, have the nurse page me. I'd like to speak with each of you then about what happened," Dr. McKenna said as the three headed for the door. John visibly cringed before he got himself under control. He was not looking forward to that talk. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The ride back to Nick's house was completely silent. Each person was lost in their own grief. When they entered the house the smell was overpowering. The entire house reeked of blood. "God this is awful," Diane said. "Hon, why don't you go pack some clothes and come stay with me and the girls? I'll get a cleaning service in here in the morning to take care of all this," Bob suggested. Diane looked around, then nodded her head. "OK, just give me a minute and I'll be ready," she said, walking upstairs and going straight into her room. She didn't dare look in Nick's, knowing that if she did she'd break down. Bob and John waited downstairs. John gathered his things and headed to the door, "I'm gonna head on. I'll meet you guys back at the hospital." "Alright," Bob said, as he left. A moment later Diane came downstairs with an overnight bag. Bob took it from her as she let Misha in and put her leash on her. As they were walking through the kitchen, Diane saw Nick's computer sitting on the table. She stopped and picked it up, staring at it. Bob put his hand on her shoulder, "He'll get through this." She nodded, "I know he will, he has to." "Come on, by the time we get cleaned up and I argue with the guys some more it'll be time to go back to the hospital," he said. Diane smiled, "Yeah, Brian didn't take it to well huh?" Bob shook his head, "That would be an understatement." Diane tucked the little computer in her bag and they headed out the door. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ John walked into his house and headed straight for the shower. He tried not to think of anything, but the vision of Nick cutting his wrist right in front of him played over and over in his mind. It was as if Nick wanted him to see it, wanted him to feel sorry for what he'd put him through. And it worked. John felt miserable. He almost lost the one thing in the world that meant everything to him, all because he had pushed Nick to far. John took the soap and scrubbed his arms, trying to get the dried blood off them. I just have to back off until he's feeling better. That's it. This can still work, I just have to show him that I'm not the monster he thinks I am. I'm not that other guy that abused him all those years ago. He'll understand, he has to, John thought. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Diane listened as Bob tried to reason with Brian. He'd been talking to him for twenty minutes and wasn't any closer to convincing him to stay. "Brian, I understand how you feel, but you have to look at this from the docs point of view," Bob said. "Screw the doc, Bob," Brian said, "Nick is hurting. I need to be there for him." "Bri, maybe the docs right," Kevin said, "If you were Nick right now would you want to face everyone?" Brian sighed, "I hate this! I need to help him. I helped him through this once, I can do it again." "Brian, please do this for Nick," Diane said, "The doc knows what he's talking about. Just stay and when Nick wants to see everyone, we'll call." "Di, I feel awful. I shoulda been there, made him talk to me, something. But instead I sat here and let him shut me out," Brian said. "Bri, he did that to all of us. Even me," Diane told him, "Don't blame yourself for something that was out of your control." Brian sighed, "This never should've happened." "I know," she said, "The plane crash wasn't suppose to happen either, but it did. Nick will get through this, but we just gotta trust the doc on this one, alright?" Brian sighed heavily, "Alright, I'll stay here." "Thanks Bri," she said. "Just please let him know we love him, and call us to let us know how he's doing," Brian asked. "We will guys," Bob said. "Alright, we'll let you guys get back to Nick," Kevin said. "K, take care," Diane said. "You too little sis. Call if you need anything, even if it's just to talk, alright?" Kevin said. "I will," Diane said, "Love you guys." "You too," Brian said, as they hung up. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ John walked into the small office Dr. McKenna had at the hospital and sat down. He was nervous as hell about telling him what happened. He couldn't let himself get caught in a lie. He almost lost Nick once today, and he had to be extra careful not to screw up and get found out. "So, John is it?" Dr. McKenna asked. "Yes, John Martin," John said. "Tell me how you know Nick," the doctor asked. "I'm his speech therapist," John answered, "And friend." "I see, and you were with him when this episode started?" he asked. John nodded, "Yeah." "So tell me from the beginning what happened," Dr. McKenna said. "K, well, I got there around my usual time. Nick was sitting outside on the patio. Diane told me before she left that he seemed really down that day, so I went out and sat with him for a minute. We talked about how nice a day it was, you know, just small talk for a little bit. Then we went inside to get started. I was just pulling my cards out when I noticed Nick had this funny look on his face," John said. "Like what kind of look?" the doctor asked. "It was weird, like he was looking at me, but he wasn't seeing me. I don't really know how to describe it, almost like he thought I was someone else," John said. The doctor jotted down a few notes, "Alright, go on." "Well I asked him what was wrong, and he just stood there for a minute. I could tell he was getting upset, it looked like he was about to cry and he was shaking. Then he turned and ran up the stairs. I took off after him and about halfway up the stairs I grabbed his brace. But he was running so hard he just pulled his arm out of it and kept going. He ran into his room and locked himself in the bathroom. I tried yelling at him to open the door, but he wouldn't listen," John said. "Did he say anything while he was in there?" Dr. McKenna asked. "Yeah, he kept saying no, over and over. And I could hear him rummaging through the cabinets and drawers. I called Bob and told him what was going on and then went back and broke the door in," he said. "What made you do that, instead of waiting for his dad and Diane to get there?" Dr. McKenna asked. "I heard him breaking things, and I was afraid that he was hurting himself," John answered. "I see, so when you got into the bathroom, had Nick already cut himself?" the doctor asked. John shook his head, "No. He ... he was standing in the corner of the room, holding the blade to his wrist but he hadn't cut it yet. I tried to talk him out of it, but he kept looking at me with that strange look in his eyes, then he did it right in front of me." Dr. McKenna handed John a tissue. John took it, not even realizing he'd been crying, and wiped his eyes. He jotted a few more notes in Nick's chart and looked up at John, "So how did you keep him from cutting the other wrist?" "Um he was having trouble holding the blade in his hand and Bob and Diane got there. All three of us talked to him, asking him to let us help him. I think something clicked, cause he looked around like he wasn't sure how he'd gotten in there, then he saw what he'd done to himself and dropped the blade," John said. "So what you're saying is that you think Nick didn't know what he was doing?" the doctor asked. John shook his head, "I don't think so. He seemed to be somewhere else." "And you have no idea what could've triggered this?" Dr. McKenna asked. "No, not at all," John answered, "I mean I knew he was having problems, but I don't know what about. I didn't realize it was this bad." "Yes, well hopefully I can get to the root of his problems and help him," the doctor said. "I hope so too," John said, "Nick's a good kid, he deserves to be happy." The doctor looked at him, "So how are you doing? I know seeing a friend do this is hard." "I'm OK," John said, "I just wish I could've done something to stop him, but it all happened so fast." "Yes, well if you need to talk, my door is always open," Dr. McKenna offered. John smiled, "Thanks. Are we done then?" "Yes, thank you for talking to me," the doctor said. John stood to leave, "Sure, no problem." "Tell the others it won't be long and I'll let them in to see him. He's still asleep, but they can spend a few minutes with him," Dr. McKenna said. "Thanks, I'll tell them," John said, walking out of the room. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Diane waited nervously outside Nick's room. She wondered what was taking the doctor so long in there. She held Nick's computer in her hands, knowing he would need it when he woke up. Dr. McKenna came out into the hall, "Alright, you can all go in for a few minutes. He's still sleeping, and probably will be for the rest of the night." Bob took Diane's hand and together they walked into the room, followed by John and the doctor. Diane bit her lip as they approached the bed. Nick looked so pale, much whiter than the sheets. He had an IV and was hooked up to a heart monitor. She looked around the small room. There was practically no furniture in it, just the bed and the tray table. There was no window and the walls were covered in some sort of material, making them soft to the touch. There was a bathroom, but all the fixtures were heavy plastic. Dr. McKenna saw everyone looking around, "This room is designed not to have anything that someone could use to hurt themselves with. It is also monitored by a closed circuit camera system, so someone is watching him all the time." "How long will he be in here?" Bob asked. "Until I feel he no longer poses a threat to himself," the doctor answered. "How often can we see him?" Diane asked. The doctor sighed, "When he wakes up, I need to establish what state of mind he's in. Until then, I really can't say. If he still wants to hurt himself I won't allow anyone to see him. If he doesn't, it will be short visits with me or another attending psychiatrist present." "What about his seizures?" John asked. "We're medicating him through the IV," the doctor answered, "And leaving the restraints off." "Restraints?" Bob asked. "Yes, normally when someone comes in under these circumstances, we will restrain them until we can evaluate them. We can't do that with Nick because if he goes into a seizure they could hurt him," the doctor answered. "And someone will be here with him if he has one?" Diane asked. Dr. McKenna nodded, "He is being watched even as we speak. There's not a corner of this room they can't see, and if that happens, someone will be here in seconds." Diane felt a little relieved, but she still didn't like the idea of not being able to see him. "We will take good care of him," the doctor reassured them, "But I must ask you to say your goodnights." None of them wanted to leave him, but they did as the doctor asked. Each taking a moment to tell Nick they loved him before they walked out of the room. "Oh doc, I brought this," Diane said, handing the small computer to him. Dr. McKenna took it, "I'll make sure he gets it when he wakes up." "Thanks," she said, turning to walk down the hall with Bob. Dr. McKenna watched them walk down the hall and turn the corner, then he took the computer to the nurses station, letting them know that it was alright for Nick to have it once he woke up. He glanced at the clock on his way back to his office to wrap things up for the night, "Long day, and I have a feeling I'm in for a lot more once he wakes up." Chapter 38 |