"The Cockatrice? I don't know, I've been putting that one off till I can think of a way to kill it."
"That's what I'm telling you Al. Will you listen to me for a second?"
In all of my journeys, I believe that Edwyn was the only one to ever call me � the great Warrior, Mage, Alchemist, and exceptionally famous Adventurer (a title that includes many more skills and titles than I will list) � the Glorious Lord Aleron Cadendain, "Al". But then again "glory" is a debatable thing, and I'm only a Lord in the minds of those who cannot imagine someone being rich and powerful without having been born into it. So I let folks call me what they like.
"Can't you count your money later? I'm saying I know how to kill the Cockatrice. Are you listening?"
"Yes."
In fact, I wasn't. We'd just returned from a particularly difficult adventure in which seven of ten adventurers had been killed either on the way to the dungeon, or in the dungeon, or on the way back. One man, Jeralagord, fell overboard and was swallowed by a sea monster; Ybaran was swallowed trying to save Jeralagord; Eoedrib located a hidden trap of spikes for us by falling into it, Yiretrem caught a round of poison darts triggered by clumsy Eoedrib; poor Sevela was mostly eaten by zombies, the rest of him became a zombie and had to be destroyed; Brirzar lost a hand to the blade of a skeletal warrior, Adrerra lost his head; and Lotheric, perhaps most pitiable of all, followed a wisp into the forest one step too far and I suppose his poor soul is still being tortured by it to this day. It was seven of eleven if you count me, but I don't count me because, due to my skill (I hope, and not merely some enchantment, though either way the effect is the same) I am never one of the ones who dies.
There was enough loot for the three survivors and I to each live out our days in comfort, or perhaps to finance another adventure (which, as a Professional Adventurer, is what I typically do with it). Legerdon The Warrior and Brirzar The Former Warrior were unable to enjoy their spoils at the moment for they were recovering from illness and injury, respectively, and were bedridden at my villa. Aside from me, Edwyn The Beast Tamer alone remained unscathed. His manner seemed rather hasty to me, and he was more interested in gold than most tamers, but he was also trustworthy and had proven his skill on the previous adventure. So we passed some time talking in the courtyard. He had taken notice of a few small, incredibly lifelike stone sculptures I had here and there. They were mostly small animals � a squirrel, some birds, and an owl or two � and all were intricately detailed.
"I can practically hear its voice!" He said, holding up a bird frozen in the midst of song. "What sculptor can carve such a thing?"
"None," I said. They were so lifelike, I explained, because they were once alive. That's how we got to talking about the Cockatrice. Usually, victorious adventurers take their money and depart, but he seemed rather uninterested in his gold at the moment. I really was quite busy counting mine.
"�So what do you think?"
"I don't know, I was thinking I might try some sort of mirror shield, something like that."
"What?" He looked confused.
"A mirror shield. You know, a shield that's mirrored � to reflect the creatures gaze back upon itself. I thought that might take care of it."
"What? No! That only works in stories. We need a real solution. We need a weasel." "Excuse me? Are we still talking about the Cockatrice?"
"Yes. And as everyone knows, the weasel is the natural enemy of the Cockatrice." "How can a weasel defeat a beast the size of the Cockatrice? He is nearly three times the height of a man."
"Well� I don't know. But the texts are very clear on this point � all I have to do is get us one, and we're set!"
At this point I became confused. "We? What do you mean?"
"Well you don't think I'm going after it by myself, do you? I'll provide the weasel, and you provide the rest of the�stuff, and he wont stand a chance!"
"And when were �we' planning to do this?"
"Right away. There's no reason to wait, after all, somebody else could think of this! Any tamer well versed in obscure animal lore could know this, and then we'd lose our chance."
"That wont be possible. I always take some time off after an adventure to rest up and plan for the next one. And I never take the same person on two adventures in a row � too much stress. I don't need my companions breaking down or losing their minds on me, you know."
"That's fine Al, but we really haven't got time for that. And I don't see any other tamers around here. Besides, I thought of it first. It wouldn't be fair to take someone else! Now you can plan while I'm off getting us a weasel. But that shouldn't take to long, so be quick about it." He seemed quite serious about this.
"I would like to get my hands on those statues. There are hundreds, maybe thousands near and presumably within the mouth of His cave, many greater and more impressive than these here. I have glimpsed them from a distance and they are works of art. I would like very much to add them to my collection.
But the two of us and a weasel against the Cockatrice? Edwyn, for a tamer I don't think you have a proper respect for this thing. It can kill an army with a glance � a glance . If I'm poisoned, Edwyn, I can cure myself; if I'm wounded I can heal myself. But if I'm turned to stone in an instant, what then? That's the end of it"
"But that's only if you make eye contact."
"Or if He touches or rends your flesh, I believe."
"We can avoid both of those things! Just don't look in his eye or let him gut you. Simple as that."
"It is rarely ever as simple as �that'. If I had a full compliment of ten and your weasel and a year to plan I would be hesitant about this. As is, I think this whole idea is out of the question."
"Why take along nine others we both know wont make it back anyway? We're obviously the best, you and I, and I'll accept only the very best weasel," He paused. "Al, if I didn't know any better, I'd say you were afraid."
"Go find a weasel," I said.
