Autumn 2004
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This is temporary menu for the writing written in October 2004.
Later, I will add this into free writing menu.
Presentation Speech
Internet Fiction
Many Korean movies have been famous throughout the world and won prizes, such as ���ƽý�, ��ȭ��, ȭ����, or ������. It is certainly a great development from the past when Korean movie had to be protected with some regulations like the government appointed the quota for the number of showing of Korean movies. However, in these days, Korean movies seem to fall into a slump or even step backward.
There are many movies which were transformed from some books, like the most famous one, Harry Potter you all know. Yet, such movies hardly success because it is hard to portray within the limited screen every nuance and delicate atmosphere of the words in the book. Also readers can imagine from the stories because the image is not given from the book, but movie consists of images and therefore people passively follow the story and the impression is much less.
However, not all such movies are third rate class. I just want to focus on some recent movies which are based on the internet fiction.
Now, we live in an isolated place where even the internet does not work well, that we cannot catch up what is the most popular among the students in other normal high schools. However, when I first came here, last November, many of my friends enjoyed reading the fiction on the internet, whose authors are young, mostly students.
As more and more people like to read such a fiction, some publishers made the fiction into books. That means, now we have to pay money to read the fiction. And some directors made those into movies, also. �������� �����ϱ�, � �ź�, ����� �ΰ���, and �� ���� ���־���.
Well, movie makers have free to select the subject matter, but, the story of the internet fiction is not a good choice obviously. Fiction itself means ��not truth��, however, internet fiction is too far from the reality even though it is not a fantasy. Moreover, such a fake background is always similar. The male main character is always really handsome and trouble making. He is always a ��¯�� in the school, every girl likes him, isn��t interested in studying but fight, drive, and drink. AND he always falls in love with a girl who has nothing special: not pretty, not rich, not smart, and just a normal student but one of a few girls who are not interested in him. And the first meeting of them is always impossible in the reality. What an irony��
I don��t think the internet fiction itself is bad. In this presentation I will not argue about whether the internet fiction is one genre of the literature or not. But it surely lacks the message to the readers. It is for fun and leisure. The core of the internet fiction is the funny way characters talk, and delicate foreshadowing which is scarcely portrayed in the movie. Therefore, the movie even skipped the advantage of the internet fiction.
Recently, students command an overwhelming majority of moviegoers. Therefore, the attractive topic for the students can be a strong point. However, I think movie makers should consider once again the quality of the movie. People talk about some movies even a few years later, such as Titanic. But will anybody talk or remember about the movies based on the Internet fiction? I hope them to stop lower the quality of Korean movies.
Works Cited
Su-jeong, Hwang(Ȳ����). ��1318 focus of movies��(1318 Ÿ�� ��ȭ �պպ�)�� Seoul Newspaper 18 Nov. 2004
Hi-jong, Kang(������), Sun-sin, Kuk(������). ��Netizen as a culture producer(���ͳ� ��ȭ�ڵ� ������ �����ڷ� ���� ��Ƽ��)�� INews 29 Dec. 2003
Guiyeoni(�Ϳ���). Scent of an angel(õ���� ���) Bandi publication(�ݵ����ǻ�) 25 Aug. 2003
Yoon-se, Lee(������). To my boyfriend(�� ����ģ������) Hwangma(Ȳ��) 13 Dec. 2003
Pink. Brain Damage : Just Like Bullshits. 15 Nov. 2003.
< http://blog.empas.com/pinkface/1467526 >
djatkd degeneration of Korean with Guiyeoni (�Ϳ��Ͽ� �츮���� ����) 8 Dec. 2003.
< http://211.234.105.88/pages/data/1654/D2653543.html >
Pino-Entertainment(�dz뿣�����θ�Ʈ). IYAGIBADE(�̾߱�ٴ�-�Ϳ�����������)
< http://novel.iyagibada.com/guiyeoni >
Presentation Speech
About Economics : previous one before changing the topic into Internet Fiction
During my speech, I want to point out why we are studying now.
Few months ago, my roommates and I talked about that, and I could not argue against the result of studying is after all the wealth. We will earn money, if we success, but what else? I did not know the answer at that time.
However, by the viewpoint of economics, your success can precede contribution to others as well, even though you do not know them at all.
If there is economic hardship, government usually can use two possible solutions; demand side and supply side. Demand side solution surely worked in the Great Depression in America. Government or the central bank increased the money supply, or cut taxes. Then, there is affluent money in the pocket of people, and they buy more than before. Firms can produce more because they can sell everything they make. As total production increases the GDP, the standard of living, increases. Moreover, because firms need to produce more, more workers are employed which means lower unemployment rate.
However, it does not work well in the present, because nowadays, firms cannot increase their supply even though there is more demand, as they already use their ability to produce fully. In other words, more demand precedes just the higher price, because the supply is relatively less than demand.
Therefore, supply side solution is necessary. Anything which can lead more production will work such as new technology or idea. Hence, education, research, and development are emphasized. And what we will be able to do is also a production. We will work anyway in various fields, yet, we will produce something. I think it worth remembered because it gives a stronger motive to work and study more optimistically.
Not only economic problems, buy also other social issues can be handled if people have more money and our country gets rich.
Right now we are paying a very high tuition for the high school education here. However, some countries in Europe, students do not have to pay any for the education; therefore, whoever wants to learn can be in the classroom. I heard some of you volunteered for tutoring students in middle school, ��õ���б�. If the government can pay them enough to get a qualified education, why they need a volunteer from outside?
Also, there are some patients who have cancer, but cannot get medical treatment because of shortage of money. The point is that the disease becomes untreatable if they miss the proper time even though they earn money after all. So the disease like cancer should be cared by the government as I look at it.
There are many things to be cared and we can surely help it to some extent. It��s not just an affluent life of only myself after this hard life here I think. You can be productive as Mr. Johnson always stresses, and there will be some helpful contribution to the whole society although you cannot get to recognize them. Therefore, I wish you not to get too much stress here, or get pessimistic point of view toward the future.
Real Success from Satisfaction
2004 2nd semester term paper
second edition
How to achieve real success is finding out the true meaning of the word ��success.�� When the definition of a word is unknown, a dictionary is usually the first solution. Longman dictionary of contemporary English defines ��success�� as ��achieving something you have been trying to do, with a good result.�� No one might completely refute that this definition is wrong because such lexical definition is ��made as a formal written phrase used by officials�� wrote Randolph Quirk, the Professor the Lord Quirt, in the Preface corner of the dictionary. Therefore, the definition in dictionaries is for the purpose of teaching people to use vocabulary better by knowing the exact meaning. However, the true meaning of success in life is neither formal nor official, and can vary from person to person. Such an abstract word does not have a certain physical form; instead it is an image in everyone��s mind. Everyone can imagine their own image of success based on their own values or experiences. Therefore, all different images of the word success are right, based on each individual��s opinion.
My image of real success is the ability to be satisfied with one��s life at all times. A successful person hopes to be oneself once again if rebirth is given because he or she is fully satisfied and not envy others. Albert Schweitzer said, ��Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.�� No matter how hard or how destitute your life, you can achieve real success easily enough if you are satisfied in yourself. Surrounding environment, goals in one��s life, what presently is being done and what a person completes in the future all effects the definition of success. There is no absolute standard to evaluate how much one��s life is successful because everyone has different values and tastes. No one can say some goals are of greater value than others. Everyone can succeed to achieve his or her own different goals in different ways. Everyone achieves real success if they attain their goals and become to love and satisfied themselves.
My parents define success as a healthy family. They want everyone in my family to have a healthy condition, especially children. Hence, my parents will achieve a real success fully just if my siblings and I do not have any diseases, even though parents themselves are too tired or poor. It is their own aim, and any other does not have any right to say it is ridiculous, narrow-minded or useless. Mr. Johnson, my English teacher at my school, thinks success is the enlightenment of all mankind to reach one organic reality like heaven on the earth. Whether or not it seems to be impractical or just idealistic, his aim is his own measurement in realization of his success. In the novel called Of Mice and Men, the main characters, George and Lennie, have a wonderful so-called ��American Dream�� to seek for. They want to retrieve enough money to live without financial worries of an uncomfortable life. In contrast, in the novel of The Great Gatsby, protagonist Gatsby wants to marry Daisy but does not care much about his wealth. Therefore, everyone has different images of achieving success. People can succeed not because of an idea that someone can obtain an object and the others cannot, but success is based on the fact that one can fulfill their own goal and be able to love oneself and be satisfied with one��s life.
As each individual has different goals, each person uses different methods to succeed in achieving one��s goals. However, not all methods work for achieving the ��true�� value of success. The ways to achieve a goal is also important to succeed, because success itself does not come from only achieving one��s goal, but comes from being satisfied with oneself. Using immoral and wicked ways makes it nearly impossible to feel satisfaction toward oneself. For instance, a person��s goal may be to achieve physical wealth. That person then might try to achieve money, power, and reputation by all means which may include cheating, stealing, or lying. Such unjust ways are not a win-win game, but a zero-sum game; hence, there exist people who suffer from their trickery. Sneaky people might use sort of means and be able to achieve their goals: money, power, and reputation. Till then, they may think they are successful; however, they will feel guilty or sorry to those victims of their superficial success, that is, if they have the least bit of conscious. It could be possible to regret one��s actions at the time of death and want to rewind their lives to correct their mistakes that affected others in inappropriate ways. That is the worst case scenario in contrast to the previous example told in advance that a successful person is fully satisfied with one��s life and wants to live same again as oneself. As one��s aim is good for more people, it possibly leads to a more satisfaction and more real success. There is no criterion to appraise goals of different people, but there is certain moral criterion to evaluate some ways to achieve goals whether they are good enough to satisfy yourself and lead you to a real success.
To conclude, satisfaction is the most essential and important factor to success. Henry David Thoreau said, ��We were born to succeed, not to fail.�� As he has stated, all people have sufficient ability to succeed since all they need is just contentment in lives for a success. If trying hard to achieve goals by pleasing ways, everyone will see a beautiful successful life soon.
first edition
To discuss how to achieve real success, the meaning of ��success�� should be clear in advance. When the definition of a word is needed, a dictionary is usually the first solution. Longman dictionary of contemporary English defines a ��success�� as ��the achieving of something you have been trying to do, with a good result.�� No one might completely refute that this definition is wrong because such lexical definition is made as a formal written phrase used by officials, as Randolph Quirk, the Professor the Lord Quirt, wrote in the Preface corner of the dictionary. Therefore, the definition in dictionaries is for the purpose of teaching people to use the vocabulary better by knowing the exact meaning. However, the true meaning of success in life, neither necessarily formal nor official, can vary from person to person. Such an abstract word does not have a certain physical form; instead it is an image in everyone��s head. Therefore, all can imagine their own images of success based on their own values or experience, and then all different images\are right description of that word.
My image of a real success is the ability to be satisfied with one��s life all the time. More specifically, a successful person hopes to be oneself once again if rebirth is given because of love and satisfaction. Albert Schweitzer said, ��Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.�� No matter how hard or no matter how hard or no matter how destitute your life is, you can achieve a real success easily enough if you are yourself: what you are surrounded, what you are seeking for, what you are doing and what you are going to do. There is no absolute standard to evaluate how much one��s life is successful, because everyone has different values and tastes. No one can say some goals are of greater value than others; therefore, everyone can succeed to achieve his or her own different aim in different ways. But certainly, they all achieve a real success if they attain their goals and become love and satisfied in themselves.
My parents define a success as healthy family. They want everyone in my family not to have any problem, especially children. Hence, my parents will achieve a real success fully just if my siblings and I start a safe independent life on our own, even though parents themselves are too tired or poor. It is their own aim, and any other do not have any right say it is ridiculous, narrow-minded or useless; actually, what others gossip is not important at all in one��s achieving a real success. Mr. Johnson, who teaches me English in a school, thinks success is the enlightenment of all mankind to reach one organic reality like heaven on the earth. Whether or not it seems to be impractical or just idealistic, his aim is his own measurement in realization of his success. In the novel, of Mice and Men, main characters George and Lennie have a wonderful, so-called ��American Dream�� to seek for. They want to get enough money to live without worries for living. In contrast, in the novel of The Great Gatsby, protagonist Gatsby wants to marry Daisy but does not care much about his wealth. Therefore, everyone has different images of achieving a success, and everyone can succeed because it��s not that if one succeed to attain one thing, so the others cannot, but that if one fulfill own goal, and be able to love oneself and be satisfied with one��s life, one is successful.
As each has different goals, each uses different methods to succeed in achieving them. But, not all methods work for a ��real�� success. The ways to achieve the goal is also important to succeed, because success itself does not come from only achieving one��s goal, but come from being satisfied with oneself. Using immoral and wicked ways make nearly impossible to feel satisfaction toward oneself. For instance, some people��s goal is achieving a physical wealth. Then, some of the might try to achieve only money or reputation by all means including cheating, stealing, or lying. Such unjust ways are not a win-win game, but a zero-sum game; hence, there exist people who suffer from their trickery. Sneaky people might think they are successful reflecting collected black money; but they will feel guilty or feel sorry to those victims of their superficial success, if they have at least a little conscious. Possibly, they would regret at the time of death and want to rewind their lives not to disturb others. That is the worst case in contrast to the previous example told in advance that successful person wants to revive as oneself again. As one��s aim is good for more people, it leads to a more real success. No one can say one goal is better than others, but there is a certain moral criteria that some ways to achieve goals are harmful to other members of society, and such ways are unlikely to help giving satisfaction.
To sum up, satisfaction is the most essential and important factor to success. Henry David Thoreau said, ��We were born to succeed, not to fail.�� As he said, all people can succeed since they just have to get contentment in lives for a success. Trying hard to achieve their goals by pleasing ways is a direct way to achieve a real success.
Presidential Debate
I saw the presidential debate through the TV in Mr. Johnson's class. I wrote down instant feeling or comments while listening; therefore, it is not organized well. Moreover, both candidates talked about several different topics, leading this writing more scattered. If I have time later, I will organize this again and create my consistent and general idea toward the two, not one by one for each topic.
Mr. Bush stimulates ��Strong America�� very well to people. I think he may get votes from whom are full of pride of being Americans. He kept saying again and again ��We win!��
On the other hand, Mr. Kerry is more cautious. He looks around the world as a whole. He seems to consider ins and outs.
Which position is better for the president? Because I am not an American, buy a Korean, I prefer Mr. Kerry; however, it seems that I can��t make my decision easily if I��m American. Therefore, I don��t know who will be elected as president this November.
I didn��t know that the problem of North Korea is that much huge to foreign countries. It appears as the topic of debate between candidates for the president election of America. I was surprised they criticize each other very bitterly. A little more, they will fight��
Multinational talk vs. direct/bilingual talk - I could not understand the topic clearly.
I think I have to study further about politics to evaluate this issue. I��ve heard multinational talk is more beneficent to America to maintain its power or position to other countries; however, Mr. Kerry has some reasons for direct talk, which I couldn��t understand well��
I like Mr. Kerry��s way of talking. He has an accent and points out what is important or the most scorching.
Mr. Bush kept saying Mr. Kerry is inconsistent to be a leader and to solve the problems related to the war, terror, and fighting. Mr. President should be consistent to make others follow him.
Mr. Kerry maintained Mr. Bush made a wrong decision. He could fix it after all because of his position, but he certainly has to be more cautious. It is not the matter of inconsistency.
But, maybe too much of caution may force America to miss the right time during the country��s big emergency. And now is that, the war.
Mr. Kerry points out ��the truth�� I strongly agree to this one while I am not sure about the former one. Leaders should be based on the truth. They should have informed every true detail about the war if they want to send troops. Soldiers just know they work for America. What if they are not for America, but for just a few politicians? How can repay their safety or even their lives?
Economics - about Homelessness
Mr. Kerry suggest to decline money for war but help homelessness. In other words, he will support the stronger social welfare system. Certainly, such problem is more necessary to treat, more en��
Mr. Bush cannot ignore the world problem/ only because it��s not Americans;��
Why always America intervene others? Work as problem-solver in the world?
Well, actually America made any good to the world during his position��
National wealth is first, he said.
There are a lot of issues the president should solve or consider. What a head-breaking job it is! Most problems can��t be attained at the same time. One should be given up to earn others. Therefore, the president has to make choices which one he will give up and which one he will pursuit in order to develop the country. No one knows the exact answer, just guess, and the result of the election makes the history book each page. Think of Hitler.. One wrong leader sacrificed a lot of people�� Selecting readers is a very important job to our lives and to the history.
What should I or How can I do to know or guess wisely?
Frankly, I don��t know who will be better as a long run. But, I prefer Mr. Kerry right now. Because, his attitude seems somewhat more appropriate for the president. Mr. Bush seems a little silly comparing to Mr. Kerry.
Nuclear Pollution
Yes, as Mr. Kerry talked, nuclear pollution is a big big problem to the world, but, how can he remove them after all?
Oh, my god�� Mr. Bush said, America can make more nuclear weapons than North Korea. So what��? So, does he want to make nuclear weapons more? I cannot imagine what is in his head.
The main stream is war and terror throughout the debate. Yeah.. the biggest issue. Mr. Bush uses sentimental stimulus like shutdown by terrorisms and children��s deaths. However, what he chose, the war, leads more cruel results, only that it is not to Americans. And the position of the president needs rational objective point of view like what Mr. Kerry shows during the debate as I look at it.
I think the news announcer who develop the debate is also very good. I like him~
Equality in terms of education
: No job because of budget after education
They introduced different issues as telling their opinions about the question. Most social issues are interacting with each other. No one can solve the problems in society one by one, but altogether step by step. It��s harder�� how? One should have knowledge and straight mind throughout variety of subjects in society�� who? Maybe someone will be able to handle them successfully, but now we cannot know who will do it nor even there is one�� The somebody in the field which is the most emergent issue to us is appropriate for the president, maybe, I��m not sure. Which standard do I have to set to decide for the better president?
Foreign countries
security is the international world��s suggestion
Mr. Kerry will not give up any benefit for America ? how patriotic, but��
Government Debt ? retiree
He increased government debt because of the war. He will get money from younger to pay. Mr. Kerry said Mr. Bush��s plan is a ��disaster.�� He will not cur benefits�� but how?
Alan Greenspan,, I know him! ^^
He is working for middle class rather than the top people. Creating jobs! No countries lost jobs due to the war except this one��
Mr.Bush : tax cut is for middle class. Economic growth insists we have to keep taxes low.
Mr.Kerry : tax will burden middle more and lighted down the richer.
Illegal Immigration ? boarder line, technology
Minimum Wage
Mr. Kerry will increase, the last set minimum wage is 50 years before. The price becomes higher; therefore, present minimum wage is not reasonable to adopt. Many will be affected so more consumption with economic growth will follow the increased minimum wage. Actually, I cannot agree the relationship of cause and results��
Mr. Bush said due to the education system, poor people will not challenge. Kids just more shuffle with minimum wage law. To raise standard, no increase in minimum wage should be maintained.
Homosexuality
I could not listen to Mr. Bush��s opinion but Mr. Kerry��s only because that��s when the teacher turned on the TV. Mr. Kerry believes buy he cannot legislate everything he believes in.
��Faith without work is dead�� : what Mr.Kerry said and impressed me.
I don��t know why church is against Mr.Kerry
Economic Issue (again) - Health Care System
Maybe economic problems is the most concerned to normal people.
Mr. Bush : high techoolohy �� -> total 4 ways to help
Mr. Kerry : import drugs with tax will cause higher cost. Medicare belongs to people. Drug benefit will fall and insurance makes people related to medical company won��t like. But that��s not really because of reduced tax�� Health care for all Americans! And Free Trade!
Government doesn��t force you anything, but freedom to pay for money, for example, healthe care system. Government runs no program.
Well, what��s BA(or VA)? Maybe it��s a name of system for Medicare. I want to know.
Death of Salesman
Willy made his own world to forget about his depressing reality. As the reality and imagination differ more greatly, he became mentally strange more. That is not a proper way to solve the problem in reality; hence, he committed suicide which is the only way to terminate.
Question!
Why does he have to live in the imagination?
Does Willy himself lack of ability to success? Or the world is not appropriate for him?
Happy also lives in the imagination? Or he just wants to assure Willy when he hide the reality?
Hamlet
Question!
Why the background is not England but Denmark?
Is he right or is he crazy?It can be true that the spirit of father is an evil and Hamlet is being deceived.
The meaning of the setting : Another autumn afternoon at 4��o clock, and the sun is contemplating
To his mother; ��common�� - same word with two meanings
I want to see the play instead of a movie.
Frailty; seems to be appropriate for Hamlet, not for women.
He was afraid of death, while he still wanted to revenge; therefore, he cannot do anything but fall in a deep dilemma. He said he had loved Ophelia, buy he caused the direct reason for her to die.
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are dead
Question! only...
I cannot understand the reasoning of Rosencrantz or Guildenstern.
=> Why heads always appear whenever they throw coins�� What is he talking about that? Or is it illogical at all?
What��s the theme?
What did the author want to point through these two dumbs?
Is there any profound background for relationship with Hamlet?
Any other reason except Hamlet is famous play?
Respond to Seoyoung's presentation
Maybe, it can be prejudice against prisoners; hence, ����ö can be a great person.
I��ve always thought such prejudice is bad; however, right after I herd her comments about ����ö��s logical talking, I thought ridiculous��
��background��
Seoyoung said ����ö is always talking eloquently, persuasively, logically, that he caught her heart one day�� -_-;;; I do not know anything about the singer; however, Seoyoung said the singer was arrested twice because he ran away from the army and he drugged. He seems that he is not a honest person at all. Morality lacks, but he is humane,(humanity��) his characteristics are good��
I don��t know whether her presentation is illogical or I have wrong mind or concept//
class poetry
We wrote poems in Mr. Woo's class. And he typed every poem and handed out. Reading those poems, I realize everyone in Ivy 3 class is a great poet! I also want to write a good poem. But, it's hard... �̤�..
The Zephyr Song
I have a memory
of when I was young
Flying a zepher
All day long
If soared high
with dreams of hope
seeing it fly
gave my joy
It is autumn
The perfect season
for flying a zephyr
out in the playground
However I have none,
It makes me sad
It makes me want to
be five again
Rain gets me wet
Soaked soil watery soft
rain falls falls falls...
Water spreads spreads spreads...
Not only sol
the rain drowns
but also my pants it drowns
So lazy I am
that I don't wannt change cloths
So, oh, rain
please keep thyself away from me
No title...
Man with no inspiration
would fall in misery
Just like a poet
who lies on blanket
Reminiscence
Three months have been left behing
But still I can remember
That day of extreme grief,
All the pain I felt inside.
so many goodbyes
Leaving me dumb and unfeeling
But only for an instant, always forgot
Oh, how time flies!
She lets out a sigh,
Faded from everyone's memory
Don't worry dear, you'll still be remembered
Even if it is only by me, just by and by
Rainy Day
Everything comes down
making all the ground damp
With umbrella, colored brown.
passing by the road of crowd
Waiting for the bus to come
walking fast to be on time for the work,
waiting for traffic light to change
wondering for what he should do.
Everyone having thought of theirs,
A rainy day of a crowded street
ends...
No title...
Even though there is a board
Warning us of the speed limit,
No one keeps the limit.
Even though there is a board
Coercing not to throw the litter
Rubbish floating on the mat
September Rain
The hoar day abates
And feline eyes wet in drops
Open the iridescent gates
Swording the soaking treetops��
Gray veils have fated away_
Into the vast sea of today_
Feel your Rain
Speak not, with your beauteous voice
How the night fades and wind sleeps
Speak not, on this day of sad rain
Why an autumn approaches and the sun reddens
Stop trying to explain what��s around you
For you��ve got voice much pleasant, spirit emotional
Listen simply to the singings of the rain
Before air dries, with your heart so bright.
Once in a blue moon
As my summer was green, your autumn turns maroon
As stars brightened last night, the storm is most welcome
The melody of somewhere beyond the clouds
I hear, with joy; once in a bluest moon.
Raining love
We eat love to live
Get soaked in the rain
To absorb enough love from sky
To treat your terrible malnutrition
We need rain to live
Get soaked in the rain
No title..
Why, why, do neglect them?
To feel the freedom?
To blow out the boredom?
Ay, found it!
It��s because you just like it!
No title.. but it's about a boy in my class ^^
Now let me tell you a tale
About a gut named Dale
He was great with the girls
A romantist with words like pearls
Well Dale was a guy
Who was surprisingly shy
He��d do whatever a girl��d ask
No matte how heavy a task
Now a new girl entered his life
She was pretty much nice
He like her a lot
And agreed with her thoughts
Well Dale was doing everything for her
But it seems he wasn��t the type for her
She became interested in another buy
Who wasn��t that nice but altogether not shy
Dale was a silly little guy
Who was used like a black bow-tie
Used, used, used like a pencil
A ruler, eraser or even a stencil.
No title..
How much the world would be perfect
If turning time back is permitted.
What have I done in a year
Have left none to my dear
My dear, my dream
Which had been the purist of the purist
Is falling
We
Everyone��s smiling.
So brightly smiling.
Everyone seems so happy with each other.
Everyone��s so sweet
As though they will never let out anger.
Oh God, or Buddha, or allah,
Or whatever��s up there,
How I hate those smikles.
No one��s honest,
Although there are beautiful flowers
Dangling on their necks,
Inside writhes with balls of worms.
Gratitude outward
Is jealousy inward
Everyone��s like a comedian on TV.
They appear on TV with smiles.
But offstage, so anxious with their schedules.
They never show the smiles they used to show
When they were on air.
What Januses we are becoming!
If you despise me, why don��t�� you say so?
Come on.
Don��t just stand there smiling.
Is this really you?
Stab me, poison me, crush me, drown me,
Choke me with a live wire.
Anything you do, but
Please, please don��t just stand there smiling.
No title...
There are
Chaos in the streets
Chaos in the buildings
Chaos in people
Chaos in church
Chaos in houses
Chaos in fields
Chaos in the world
But
happiness in you
Hidden Beauty
Real beauty is hidden
Hidden beauty is real
Found
In the sparkling eyes
Of an hopeful Afghan child
Before another hard day.
Or,
On the other side of the world,
Among the graciousness
Of the richest man on Earth
On Christmas Eve.
Little Jesus,
Alive and well,
Create a hidden beauty in every heart
One who sees the real beauty
Is the happiest of all.
To be united once again
Worms and frogs on the road
Umbrellas slung onto the ground, whose owner never returns
Dingy muddy water on the stairs
And the traces on the soil
Though their reasons to be here are different
Their union seems so vague and irrelevant
They will come once and many time again
On a day like this.
The Easy World
Run, and
Fall down
It hurts
Run, and
Fall down
It hurts
Much more thin time
Cuz the world also
Run, and
Fall down
Toward me
And just like me
Take it easy
Make it easy
I can go there
With slow walking
Without falling down
And with the easy world
Just notes without any importance;; ^^
I wish I have 48 hours a day or I wish I can live without sleeping or I wish there is no class -_-;; or I wish I can get three day off.
Then I can make everything easy ^^* I want to love all. What the heck is this.. This seems the collection of illogical alphabets just like myself right now.
Poem..
It does not have a title yet, because I did not finish this poem. I was very impressed by something to write about a vague thing which I don't know exactly..
I��ve feared to share
My vulnality, my pain, or my sad memory.
Because others avoid any bad things
And I want to disturb none.
Yet
I��ve expected
Somebody will actually figure them out without telling
Somebody will certainly understand me without talking
As time passes,
Now I cannot talk any more, even though I want
Because I fear
I would fall down because of mental burden
While talking my rotten black hole
Now I need
Somebody who know my black secret
Only by nuance of words or slight difference in my eyecolor.
�� incomplete
Gandhi Discussion
After reading 'All men are brothers', a biography of Gandhi, we discussed about the contents. Some agree while others disagree with Gandhi. At that time, I suddenly want to write what is related to myself.
��I believe that you are there buy I can��t hear you.��
Religion seems to teach me toward the most desirable way. That is the perfect way to live as the puriest person�� is it really a right answer to lead my life? After the election for the member of the student council, I��ve strongly believed ��no enemy, no friends.�� Trying hard not to express this thought, I decide not to give up anything of mine to ��non-friends�� from now on. I realized that I cannot be liked by everyone. I just want to keep my precious friendship, and I don��t want to waste any effort nor time to non-friends. If I want to be liked by my friends, I have enemies, too. Dilemma, dilemma�� That��s not what I��ve thought as a right thing when I was a chilled, I mean younger. My best motto was ��Don��t tell anything disturbing others�� Then, I must conceal my thought which may contradict them. That��s good thing. That is a kind person. That��s what great leaders from the past always have emphasized. That��s what the religion, in my case Catholic, has told me to do so. Maybe I can succeed as following my thought; however, that��s just for my life. That��s not reasonable for me to stay here. I can live like that outside well enough, enjoy everything. What is right, what is wrong? I don��t know which one is better and which one is true�� I really really went somebody to tell me. I want the simple answer for my life even though it is impossible. Tell me Tell me I��m really depressed whenever I��m thinking about this.
If I have a plenty of time to think deeply, I may find the answer whether right or wrong, but at least pacifying one for myself. But, due to the mid-term test and many other thins to be considered, I skip this question which is rotten day by day. I fear one day, it explodes and there is no solution for it any more��
What am I going to do? I don��t know. I��m just following the schedule which KMLA gives. That��s not enough, or even harmful. I don��t know. I don��t know. I want the answer or helper.
I��ve always thought I��d already passed the age of puberty. But, maybe, now I��m experiencing it. I don��t know this either. What a fool��
I��m busy right now. I fear if I pass this time, I cannot catch up other friends later. So I cannot break and think over this question, and the question remains here maybe forever rotting and rotting��
After Mid-term in 2nd semester 2004
maybe.. vague gray.. unclear blackblue..
When I was in the middle school, I didnot have any specific dream or plan for future. At that time. I didn't even want to consider about it. I just did what my parents or teachers told me to do. I was very very obedient, as I look at it. I made no trouble at all. I never refused anything. Only, I sometimes do what I want in break time. But, that is when I had finished my duty, and no one interupped or blamed me in doing so. I had no worry nor plan. It was well-organized daily life. There was no exception and I thought it would remain.
Yet, here in KMLA, I want to fulfill my duty as well. However, I have failed again, again, and again. What I show my parents in these days is just disappointment, worries, and sighs. How bad daughter I am..
As a middle school student, I have self-confidence and self-respect. I thought I can live on two things even without money. Myself was so full of both of things, and they coplement each other well enough to lead and instigate me into the better place.
Now in KMLA, self-confidence is totally smashed whenever after I take tests. Every test gets rid of my self-confidence. Now remaining self-respect lingers in my mind. Self-respect alone only gives me more frustration, no help at all. Bigger and bigger gap etween self-confidence and self-respect falls me into an inescapable chaos. Sometimes I feel I just want to end up everything and go away where nothing exists.
It is strong urge for me to think about going out of this school. Because every time I took the tests, I feel this is not my place. My style seems not appropriate for this school and that is why I cannot be happy here. I am not good at English. In the limited time during the test, I always missed one or two words in the question, and solved the problems totally differently from the right answers. But, I did not realized I had misinterpret the question, I thought I got many questions right. But the results are always the opposite and more terrible emptiness attacks me. It is too demanding.. It seems no solution for this problem. Next time, I will make same mistakes again because English cannot be overcome in short time. This makes me tired and stressful, because there is no remaining hope.
What am I going to do? I don't know. I just want to end up.
I decide to give up my goal to some extent. Too high goals may make me more tired. I don't want it any more.. I will try hard to satisfy and not be disappointed by the high standard. Be myself. I will maintain myself. I will no longer follow any good models. I will just put my best effort and feel no regret at all. Then, I will go to the university which select me in this shape. I want to live easier life now. Don't remove my self-confidence any more, or I will lose self-respect also. I will find self-confidence again and my happy life as in the home, as in the past.
Tired Day : After mid-term and the trip to Mt.Kumkang
Already November.. Disgusting��
It��s been a year since I came here. I cannot believe it and I do not want to believe it either. I have done nothing in the past one year. I fear remaining 2 years will also pass without any success.
I don��t know why buy I have to admit that I have a lot of things to do even though it is only one week after the mid-term. Yesterday,,, it was deadly amazing to see books piled up on the desk, waiting to be opened. But, too many things discouraged me to start or even sit down in front of the desk. So I tried hard to concentrate by going to the library and the self-study room, yet no accomplishment after all.
And, today morning, more books are waiting! Perfectly defeated!!
Even worse, now I must pick up EVERY book on the shelf again because my dorm teacher will check CLEANING condition this afternoon. What a headache�� I should have finished yesterday desperately.
I am totally depressed. No more motivation for the life. If one bright spark is given to my mind, I will be able to start again, perhaps. But, today I just want to sleep whole day, forgetting about everything. Both my body and mind are soaked in black river.
Next period, I have to change my clothes for Kumdo, go up to the hills to the gymnasium, and join a league for the contest with this terribly tired body like a stone. Even right now, I want to sleep. Why am I writing this with no consequence nor organization? Frankly, this is not writing, but this is just an instant thinking roaming in my head right now. Well, maybe, I need some break time. Three days with nothing to be done. That is an only thing which I need and I want from the bottom of my heart.
Stupid poem
Your existence
Ruined him
That��s the most terrible
Among what I heard.
My existence
Ruined him
Then, I cannot help it
There is no solution
It was not me
That started such existence
I argued again and again
To defend myself
However, it is true
To see such a ruined boy
Is more than a torture
Always lingering around my head:
��maybe it��s his fault.��
��maybe it��s what the world did.��
��maybe it��s everyone��s��
Always final conclusion is:
��It was my fault. No excuse, stupid!��
I was blurred
Because of my silly trivial troubles
But after a long time
It became rather a clear image
Which can completely destroy
My 24 hours
If I do A, A is harmful
If I do B, B is devastating
~~~~~
And if I do Z, Z is disastrous.
Frustration
Total failure
Even worse,
I can��t hope to go back to the past
Because, still, I don��t know
What is better for me to do.
cafeteria-phobia
Too many people are going around in the meal time within a small area. Everyone keeps passing by with a formal greeting. I can feel that all of them are busy doing their own business. Completely no interest in others or anything else. Such a feeling has changed into an enormous stress that prevents me from going up to the cafeteria every meal time.
Well, maybe, everyone is same from the mourning to the evening; however, in the meal time, it becomes the most obvious. Why do their faces so frowning while eating? I really want to go home and eat with my family, talking about something happy and enjoyable.
In these days, I realized that eating gets rid of much of stress. As eating becomes a problem, there is no chance to laugh without worries.
One of my closed seniors first said I have an anthrophobia, but actually I really love to go amusement parks. Thus, I do not think I have one at all. Then, the senior said I have a ��sik-dang(cafeteria) phobia��. Because there is no certain proof for such a thin, I am not sure about that. Yet, I really want the cafeteria to be a happy place for me to eat with a smile.
Diet
Notes for Stephanie��s presentation
1. Food 2. Exercise
She introduced ��Food Diet�� especially.
1)Eating habits – 3 meals at a given time(regular eating)
2)Distribution of meals – breakfast > lunch > dinner
3)Cup of water before meal – to help digest better
4)Stop eating before you feel full completely
5)Warm water before going to the bed to help blood circulation(digestion)
6)Take time to eat(eat slowly) > able to stop eating before feeling full
2. Another king of ��Food diet�� – consuming/focusing one food
Ex) cocoa, water, coke, chocolate, citron, aloe, honey, milk, green tea.
�� I could not understand nor agree that cocoa and chocolate can work!
1)green tea
-good for beauty
-drink it like water
-5-6 cups of green tea a day
-Can get rid of flesh especially in stomach and thigh
2)coke
-cup of coke instead of dinner
-carbon dioxide makes you feel full and lack eating desire
3)chocolate
-consuming a little bit to make you feel : eating before your meal
-Getting rid of stress from the fact that you are on diet
-Sugar-less chocolate for a diet
# I still do not think that chocolate and coke are good. Because even though they make you feel full, they are not good for health and even harmful, especially eating those instead of meals.
Intermediate Value Theorem
Sincerely, I want to be their friends, yet they always ran away from me. Why do they hate me so much even though I did not do anything harmful? Instead I��ve tried hard to be familiar with them. In KMLA, there are so many things which deny to be with me. How sad life here it is..
I had a math class right before. Because of the pressure for the CR and vocabulary test, I slept from 10:00 PM yesterday. I hate them seriously.. And, due to enough sleeping, I was widely awake for 3 classes in a row in the morning, including World History. I felt some kind of pride~ I am not sleepy at all today. But, it becomes so amazing that I could not understand anything even though I did not sleep in the class. What a calculus.. T.T
Intermediate Value Theorem in terms of derivatives seems to be a wonderland last period, as well as the Java things. They always emit a great amount of bright amazement in every class. Its explanation is like a foreign languages from an isolated island located far away.
I want to end this heart-breaking and one-sided love at once, toward Java, Calculus, Physics, World History, and Time�� I cannot even remember all. Maybe they hate me because they want my whole love, but I have to be familiar with them all to survive here. Why cannot they understand me? How selfish! Will I give up but one or continue to strive to be a friend with all of them? I have no time to even consider that question.. Just,, let me in. I love you guys all, and please..
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